Too cool for school

June 8, 2012Leave a comment

My sis is a rockin’! She is a superstar. She is fab.

Sarah got the writing gene in the family. My brother got the music gene. And I got the left-brained, analytical gene. But between the two of them, I have added some right-brained creativity to my world (I can draw a heck of a stick man). Back to my sis, Sarah. Did I tell you she’s a superstar…?

Maria idolizes her and when Sarah is in town, she begs to be with her. They do Stauf’s trips together, make collages, and take the pups on walks. Everyone sees Sarah in Maria – she definitely has Sarah’s independent streak and her contentment with alone time. I am hoping Maria laps up Sarah’s love of reading and writing as she heads into second grade. Maria has framed pictures of Sarah (and Sarah’s pups) on her bed stand and she asks questions about her randomly through the week. The other day she asked if Aunt Sarah liked first grade. I told Ri we’d have to ask her next time she was in town, and Ri chirped “is she coming soon?!” There is no doubt that Aunt Sarah is super cool in Ri’s eyes.

And she is even cooler in her big sister’s eyes with all that she is accomplishing. She recently wrote a post on turning thirty, and it allowed me to see a glimpse of the struggles that she is facing with being a traveler and being a married, mom-on-the-mind, thirty-year old woman. That she opens up to the world like she did in that piece and gives others the opportunity to ponder where they are, what they are doing, or simply get some enjoyment out of a good piece of writing, is, how can I word it? Super Cool. About a year ago, she started an on-line magazine, Vela, for creative non-fiction writing inspired by travel and women are the only authors. No small task but she did it. When I opened up Facebook this afternoon, she had posted that she was quoted in a Forbes article based on her role in Vela. Huh?! I love that I can randomly scan Facebook and find out my sis was interviewed by a Forbes writer. Gotta love that girl.

So, this post goes out to you, my little sis, for being one cool chick. Take refuge in the fact that you have an adoring niece who will probably be begging to live with you in the next five years, and a gushing big sis who thinks you are awesome!

Look at me!

June 8, 2012June 8, 2012Leave a comment

Mario begged to bring in donuts for his friends today. It’s Friday so I caved in and agreed. We biked down to Tim Horton’s and he ordered 20 timbits – all chocolate except one glazed “because Fiona only likes glazed.” He already knows how to impress the ladies.

He loves to bring the donuts because everyone swarms him. Jon and I are learning that he is bound to be the class clown with all of the antics that he engages in to get attention. Last night, he shrunk his head down into his shoulders to make it look like he had no neck because he was making fun of Jon’s lack of neck and we laughed hysterically. He kept doing it over and over basking in his glory of making us laugh. And when we stopped, he tried another antic to get us going again.

He loves attention, our boy. Whether it’s through donuts or acting crazy, he’ll find it.

To Swim or not to Swim

June 7, 20124 Comments

Maria cried and cried last night when we got home from work. She had gone to Swim Team practice earlier in the day and hated every second of it.

Why? Because “she just hates it. She’s bored. She came in last and she just doesn’t enjoy practice.”

Let’s parse out those reasons. The first one I tend to not give much credence to because she’s got to learn to give reasons why she doesn’t want to do something. The second – she’s bored – I also have trouble with. Life can be boring, girl. We have spoiled you by engaging in activities all the time and this is what happens.

The third one made me think and review my decision. I don’t want her to hate going to practice everyday and I don’t want her to feel self conscious about her swimming. Right now, she just enjoys being in the water and playing around and jumping off the diving board. I don’t want to push her away from that by forcing her into a sport she doesn’t want to participate in at this time. But I balance that with my strong desire to have her learn swim strokes and be a better swimmer. I could care less about the meets and competition. So which one weighs out the other?

One girlfriend said that her daughter hated it too and she told her daughter she could give swimming up but she had to take up at least one sport. Her daughter chose tennis and loved it. I am warming up to that idea with the thought that I’d still make Ri take individual swim lessons this Summer.

I am still conflicted though. I played piano for four years when I was ages 7-11 but then I begged to not practice anymore. I can’t remember how long or intensely I begged, but my parents agreed to let me stop. Now I wish they would have “made” me continue practicing. But maybe I would have rebelled if they made me keep it up at age 11 and run away and met up with bad seeds and gotten into prostitution and been killed…. It’s always easier to look at things in the past and think “if only.”

So, my gut tells me to keep her on Swim Team for two weeks. If she still hates it, then she can choose another activity. I think Jon is on board with the plan, too. Mario just thinks Maria is crazy – who wouldn’t want to compete?!

Waking happiness

June 5, 2012June 5, 2012Leave a comment

I woke up to a little hand laying on my head and a pair of sleepy blue eyes staring at me. I hesitantly got out of bed and tripped over a pair of five-pound weights. Ugh. Open your eyes, Mary.As I headed out for a run, I hoped not to wake the snoring Maria in her room.

When I got home, Mario gave me a kiss -peck goodbye and headed out with Jon to school. Jon told me he loved me. Maria laughed at my silly antics and rode her bike outside while waiting for Maggie.

I got ready for work – a task I had no desire to perform. I wanted to stay home and play with Ri and plant flowers and pick up Mario and chat with Jon.

But, alas, life is not perfect. So I continued on my task and headed to work knowing that I’d see my darlin’ crew in a mere eight hours.

And It’s One, Two, Three Strikes You’re Out

June 4, 2012June 8, 20123 Comments

Mario had his first tee-ball practice this afternoon. He was ecstatic. He has been dreaming of this practice for weeks.

Jon, Maria, Maggie and I all attended his first practice, and he loved us being there. He would flag us down and yell “watch me!” He started out throwing the ball with a friend and trying to catch the ball (tennis ball, thank goodness) with his glove. Then he moved onto the batting practice. He had to swing at the ball from a plastic tee. He cranked that part of the practice connecting with the ball each time. His partner was not such a quick study and whiffed the ball. Mario decided to put on his coaching hat and help him out. He approached the boy and asked to see his bat. He then got into position and showed him how to hold the bat and then how to swing. The boy took the bat back and swung to hit the ball. He connected, and Mario stood behind me nodding his head up and down in coach pride. It was hilariously sweet.

Next, he fielded grounders in the in-field. He did about as poorly as the other kids – we definitely need to work on catching with a glove. But he loved it. He kept wanting another grounder when he missed his but he soon learned the rules of practice – everyone gets a turn. Finally, they had to run laps around the bases. Mario loved this exercise, too. He tried to get to the front of the line each time they ran around, and on the last round, he asked if he could go one more time. What a munch.

Maria sat with a girlfriend who had brought her six-month old twins to practice. She played with one twin while my girlfriend held the other. She loves to watch babies – she picks hanging with the moms over her own friends. She is our old soul. But when she saw Mario rounding the bases, she quickly leapt up and ran over to third base to root him on with us. She yelled “go Mario – you are so fast” as he rounded the base. She stuck her arm out to deliver a high-five and he proudly slapped it as he whizzed by us.

Good Morning!

June 4, 2012June 4, 2012Leave a comment

Maria woke me up this morning at 6:20. She jumped out of our bed and shot into her room. She was dressed in 5 minutes and back in our room asking when Maggie would be over. Can we say excited?!

Maggie took Maria to the school that Maggie teaches at today. it was the last day of school for Maggie’s kiddies so they were making sundaes and watching movies. Maria was pumped. Jon said she sat on the front door steps for 10 minutes waiting for Maggie to pick her up. Doll baby girl.

Meanwhile, Mario climbed in bed with Jon and me while Maria got dressed. I tried to gently sneak out from under his arm but he quickly opened his eyes and asked “where are you going, mom?” I told him I was going for a run and I’d be back soon. He did what I knew he’d do – begged to go with me. And I responded the way I knew I’d respond – ok. So, he hopped in the stroller with the iPad and we were off. We had to make the Tim Horton’s stop to get Timbits but only after he ate a graham cracker with peanut butter so he had some nutrients swarming around his system.

We returned an hour later in order to miss seeing Maggie taking Maria for the day (Mario would have been so angry to not be included to the party). On the way down the street, Mario and I engaged in his favorite game. He says “You don’t love me mom!” and I respond “of course I love you goofy” while I reach down and tickle him. He loves this game and we play it all the way home. I pick him up out of the stroller to take him inside, and he gives me a huge bear hug as we walk in the back door and get ready for school.

A good start to the morning.

Distance really does make the heart grow fonder

June 3, 20122 Comments

Maria Grace stayed with Jon’s mom this entire week. We went up for Memorial Day on Monday and she just returned today. I swear she looks two years older. She got four inches cut off of her hair during her stay with Grandma. She greeted me with a huge hug and smile but when I asked her how her time was with Grandma and Alana, she responded “it was fine but I don’t want to talk about it.” Huh?! I asked her if something went wrong and she looked at me puzzled. “No, mom, I just don’t feel like talking about it.”

Ok. I am not ready for this response when just two weeks ago she would have went on and on about her time with Alana and her adventures with Grandma. Well, maybe I exaggerate a bit – she has never been that talkative about her days; but she used to at least summarize them for me! I let it go in order to just enjoy the moment with her – soak up her smile and her laugh. Mario yelled “Ria” when he saw her and gave her a huge hug that lasted 30 seconds. He had been asking when she’d be home for the last three days.

One of the first tasks that Maria set out to do when she walked in the house was write a letter to Ann Curry. Yes, the Today Show’s Ann Curry. Jon and I default to NBC News in the morning, and Maria enjoys watching it, too. She loves Ann Curry; she thinks she’s smart and stylish. Her letter told her as much and she also added a sentence stating that Ann Curry helps her learn more about the world. Precious. I had Maria write Ann Curry’s name and address on the front of the envelope with the hopes that it does not get pitched since it is clearly from a kid. We will keep our fingers crossed…!

Meanwhile, Mario and I wrestled. He made me grab his leg each time he started to turn the DVD dial and then after I grabbed it, he shocked me with the electric waves coming out of his fingers. I had to play dead for five seconds and then come back alive to do it all over again. He could have played that game with me for two hours but I could only handle about 15 minutes. I had to play a game of HeadBandz in order to get him off the wrestling kick, and then find his Spiderman costume for him to wear.

I got a massage in the mid-afternoon, which was a piece of heaven for an hour. Is there anything better than a scalp massage at 3 pm? And I could hire someone to rub my feet all day long and think it was money well spent. I lifted myself off the massage table afterwards, and had deep creases along my face and legs – a sign of a good massage. Jon decided to cook lemon chicken for dinner so we spent an hour preparing the chicken and the sides while the kids played on the computer and drew. It was a very strange yet wonderful experience for us. Strange to smell sweet aromas throughout the kitchen and wonderful to cook our own meal (the joke is that we have only used our pots and pans a handful of times since we were married in 2002).

The kids even liked it! And Maggie, hung over and all, enjoyed it, too. After dinner, we rode our bikes up to the mailbox to deliver Ann Curry’s letter (and a b-day card to Grandma Lolo) and chow on some Orange Leaf. Mario gave up on his bike at Stauf’s so I carried him the rest of the way (I am a sucker!). Jon played on his new scooter for a bit; Maggie texted her friends and engaged in time trials with the kids; and I cleaned up. A good ending to a long day. I am excited to have Maria back with us even if she doesn’t want to divulge her week to me. As long as I still get those hugs, I am ok.

Being conscious of treasures

June 1, 2012June 1, 2012Leave a comment

We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures. ~Thornton Wilder

I am making a conscious effort each day to step back at certain moments in time, be it with the kids or work colleagues or Jon or by myself, and appreciate the moment for what it offers to me. These small retreats build up, and by the time evening rolls in and I am putting on my pjs alongside Maria and Mario, I generally feel grateful for what life has offered me through the day (there are those rare evenings where even a day full of wonderful moments can be demolished by a child going through a temper tantrum).

There are tons of books and magazines and blog sites touting the benefits of gratitude but it’s not until you actually make that conscious effort of practicing it that it hits home. I feel more serene when I go to sleep, more hopeful during my day, more positive in my outlook. Overall, I guess I would say I am more “happy” – whatever that looks like. I simply feel more alive and more connected.

Today, I got to take a run in the morning for the first time in two weeks. Jon stayed with Mario while I ran through the neighborhood and lifted weights at the gym. Listening to NPR for 45 minutes was the best gift I could receive from Jon. On my run home, as I listened to Michael Jackson’s Beat It and looked at the gardens lining our street, I had one of those step-back moments. I felt an intense swelling of gratitude for Jon, and his selflessness in letting me get up in the mornings to do the thing I love to do. I also felt grateful for my legs – yeah, my legs! For allowing me to be able to run the distance I am able to run and let my mind drift as I listen to stories and news on NPR. It is such a treasure for me.

Later in the day, when I came home from work to find Mario and Jon already back from school, I felt that surge of gratitude rise again. Mario popped out of the family room with a whopping smile on his face telling me to close my eyes. When I opened, he had his home-made graduation cap on his head and the same smile across his face.

“I graduated today, mom!”

Some in his class graduated to Kindergarten today but they let all of the kids make caps (always politically correct). He was so proud of his creation. We took a bike ride later to get his haircut, and while on the bike, he asked me to sing to him. I sang him a rhyming song about how much I loved my boy cuz he was just like a toy, and his toes tasted like soy… (yeah, I know, pretty lame except to a four-year old), and he turned around laughing at me. It was the sweetest moment. I replay it in my head as I sit here tonight, and it still makes me smile as I think about it. When we got to the salon, he made me move away from him while the gal cut his hair because he wanted to be alone with her. He wanted to tell her how he wanted his hair. I sat in the seat up front the entire time without him ever calling out for me. When she finished, he got out of his chair, and walked over to me.

“What do you think, mom?”

“You look awesome, dude.”

He walked over to the mirror and put his hand through his hair, and nodded his head up and down. He knew he looked good. Man, I am grateful for that nut.

When we got home, Jon told me that he called Maria at Grandma Ionno’s house. Patty told him how Maria kept her and Joe laughing throughout the day with her quips. She was telling a story to Patty and Joe and Joe closed his eyes. She looked at Patty and said “I guess the story was a little long – no wonder Grandpa fell asleep!” That girl has got a personality to last a lifetime, and I am grateful beyond words to have her in my life (and I miss her like mad – get home, pumpkin girl!).

I am thankful for this consciousness of treasures I continue to sharpen in my daily life. Now, off to a good-night’s sleep.

Bugs and letters

May 31, 2012Leave a comment

Mario woke up crying on Tuesday morning at 1 am. We went to the bathroom since he was complaining of stomach pains but no luck there. A half hour later, we were back in there again but this time he threw up. And threw up more. And this was the rest of our night. He finally fell asleep at 5:30 am and slept for a good two hours (took me back to the days when he was nursing!).

We left for the doctor’s appointment at 11 am and by noon we were at Children’s Hospital. The doc was concerned that he had appendicitis. All I could think of was emergency surgery, no Jon, recovery time, would he make it through…. I kept a smile on for Mario, though, who was a trooper through the tests and probes. After five hours, we got the news.

He has gas.

Ok, he actually had a gastrointestinal virus that caused his stomach ache and gas but I find the gas prognosis much more comical. It’s one of those things where you never wish for a serious prognosis but you also think “I just sat in this ER for five hours to hear that he has gas?!”

We went home and watched more Ben Ten then I ever care to watch again and ate Popsicles. By Wednesday morning, he was up and running and back to his Mario self. Unfortunately, all of the cuddling the day before transferred the bug my way and I was twisting and turning in bed wanting to feel better.

I knew how much Mario wanted to go to Swim Team try outs though so I got my tired self up and took him. He had to kick on the kick board and float on his back. He had to swim the breaststroke and freestyle. He did really well and his “coach” for the day, Lauren, told him so. She also told him she would look for him next week at practice. He shyly looked away and said “ok.”

He jumped out of the pool and dried off. Then he looked up at me and said “Mom, I am going to make Lauren a card that says thank you for teaching me to swim … and I am going to give her three dollars”

Bless his little heart. He hates to give away any money so for him to give her three bucks means she made a heck of an impression on him.

When we got home, he had a card waiting for him from Maria.

I read it to him and he just stared at it. When he finally looked up, he said “I really miss Ria.” I asked if he wanted to send her a card at Grandma Ionno’s house but he declined. He was off and playing with his Omnitrix. One letter was good enough for him.

Memorial Day memories

May 29, 2012May 30, 20122 Comments

We spent Memorial Day without Jon but with his family. We met up with Patty and Joe at their new condo and Patrick, Carrie, Alana, and Gio joined up with us, too. The condo is perfect for family get togethers – it has a downstairs set up for the kids and big windows that allow you to see to the pond out back (and therefore relax in the AC while the kids play in the sun). Patty is very happy with the move, which makes it even more wonderful to visit. She already has it feeling like home, and the kids run around like they’ve been there for years.

We started the day off with a swim at the country club next to the condo. As Patty and I said together, they better be ready for this family! The pool was really deep – the lowest end was 4 feet – but it was great fun for the kids. Everyone can swim but Gio and they had a baby pool. Maria and Mario jumped off the diving board a lot – Maria did the mid-air splits and Mario did the cannonball.

I was exhausted to the point of not even wanting to move but being with the kids and having some wind hit us (at least it wasn’t 95 degrees) made me perk up. Patty had all of her new neighbors walking up and talking to her and Joe – she is already a social butterfly around the grounds! They enjoyed watching M&M jump off the diving board.

We stayed a good three hours before heading back to the condo. I appreciated the swimming after I looked at the food we were eating for dinner. Delicious steak, baked beans, and potato salad. Home made and all! I just ate and ate and just when I couldn’t eat any more, I ate cookies for dessert. Pure heaven.

The boys fished after dinner (Uncle Patrick caught a blue gill) and drank lemonade on the bank. What a good life. Maria and Alana played dress-up and sang BTR songs.

Mario and I took off at 7 or so. Maria got to stay with Grandma and Grandpa since she is out of school. She was so excited. Mario was mighty mad. But he was so tired from swimming like a fish that he soon got over it and snoozed in the back the entire ride home.

When I pulled up to the house at 8, I gently took him out of his seat and carried him to the bed. I laid him down softly with a smile on my face thinking about having a couple of hours of peace before bed. But as I moved away from the bed, he popped up and smiled “I was faking mom!”

Yeah, alone time was not in the cards for me this holiday weekend, but I wouldn’t have changed a thing.

"MOM!"

Adventures in the Life of a Working Mama

Category: Family