Tag: joy

Kid time part two

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So just when I thought Saturday was wonderful, Sunday provided just as much joy. I took Rocco out in the early morning to get a good run in the woods. When I came home, Mario asked if we could go to Stauf’s. A dream come true. Both kids willingly put on their gym shoes to walk up to the coffee shop with me.

We played our go-to card game – crazy eights- but with a twist to it. Maria came up with the idea that whoever lost the game would have to crawl on all fours down our street as we approached home. I mentioned that there would be two losers with the three of us playing and she made an executive decision that whoever had the most cards when one of us won would be the loser. Of course, that ended up being me. We then decided to play a game of war which we have not played in a long time. Maria came up with the penalty for losing that game as well. Whoever got out of cards first had to hop on one foot down our street. Mario ended up with that one.

Maria enjoyed shouting out commands to Mario and me as we performed our designated penalty move down the street. As soon as I tried to take a rest from walking on all fours, Maria would shout out “keep going, keep going!” When we finally arrived home, hips hurting, Maria and Mario asked if we could do a couple of the athletic challenges.

The first challenge involved shooting a basketball into the hoop blindfolded. Maria retrieved a sleeping mask from the house and gave it to Mario. She then held up four fingers to see if he could see or not (I don’t really understand why the kids do this seeing that Mario could just make up another number to act like he couldn’t see when he could, but I digress). She placed him at the distance of a free-throw line. He had 30 seconds to shoot as many baskets as he could. He, of course, was bragging that he would win this game for sure. He ended up making one basket in 30 seconds. I thought for sure I could handle it. Maria went next and also got one. I went last and ended up with only one as well. It is a lot harder than you think. We shot another round and each got two. Then on the final round, Mario ended up beating us with three. Bum.

Next came the dizzy run. Oh, how I hate activity that spins you around and around. I still have nightmares from Mario’s and my adventure at the Ohio State fair. He made me get on a round spaceship where we stand against the wall and the spaceship twirls around at top speed for what feels like seven years. I got off of that ride and could not function for 30 minutes. I literally laid on the concrete in the middle of the fairgrounds to try to get my composure back. This dizzy run game took me right back to that feeling.

Mario went first. He had to stand a plastic bat upright on the ground and place his head on top of it. Then he had to spin his body around it ten times. Then he had to throw the bat to the side and run down our driveway and back. How did Maria and I not think to put our video camera on?! It was hilarious. He ran directly over to the bushes on the side of the house and fell right into them. He tried to get himself up but was so discombobulated he couldn’t stand up. Finally he got himself up and ran all the way the other direction against the fence. It was hysterical. He finally was able to adjust himself so that he could run in a somewhat straight line to the end of the driveway and back. I was not looking forward to my turn.

Maria, however, was. She grabbed the bat and told me to start timing her. She went around and around with her head firmly on the top of the plastic bat and when I yelled 10, she began her run. She had a little bit more composure than Mario but still found herself running into the fence and then veering all the way over to the neighbors porch towards the end. She was a few seconds behind Mario by the time she reached the finish line.

I was up next. I warned the kids that I may pass out. I did my 10 spins, and lifted my head up. Shit. I felt like I was going to throw up while my head simultaneously exploded.

The kids enjoyed every minute of it.

After my ordeal, we agreed that we needed some AC time in the house before we engaged in any more athletic competitions. The kids read their books for 30 minutes without too much complaining. I went to Kroger’s to buy chicken and herbs for dinner. Maria had won the right to choose dinner and she wanted garlic crusted chicken with ceasar noodles. When I return from the store, the kids agreed to head to the pool for an hour before dinner.

When we arrived, Maria spotted five of her male classmates swimming in the pool. She refused to go in to the same area they were located. So, we ended up in the 7 foot area where I timed Maria and Maria as they competed to see who could touch the bottom of the pool the quickest. We went down the slides a couple of times and jumped off the diving board until the whistle blew for adults-only swim. Mario teased Maria and kept standing over her when she wanted to get out of the pool. He would push her back into the pool when she lifted up to get out. She is not a rule breaker, unlike her brother, so it stresses her out to remain in the pool when it’s for adults only. She about ripped Mario a new one when she finally got out of the pool.

Dinner turned out halfway decent for once. I actually followed the directions on how to make the chicken, which made it turn out pretty daggone good (the last time I tried to make garlic crusted chicken, I coated it in flour not reading the directions properly – needless to say, much of that chicken went to waste). We sat together as a family talking about random people and events. It was wonderful. These summer nights, prior to school starting and all of the activities around sports and homework, are to be cherished. I soaked it in as I mixed my noodles and chicken, and devoured a big bite of goodness.

Kid time

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This may go down as one of my most favorite days ever. I got in a sweaty, excruciating workout in the morning, and arrived home to two kids that were just waking up at 10 AM. Jon and I have been dreaming about our children waking up at a decent hour since they were infants. Ever since birth, they both woke up at the crack of dawn. But over the last week or so, they have been sleeping in. Mario slept in until 11 AM the other morning! It’s usually more like 9 AM but that still is still a wonderful gift to us. Of course, they will be going back to school in a month and have to start getting up at the butt- crack of dawn again:)

I made Mario some waffles and cleaned up the kitchen while Maria sauntered upstairs from her “dorm room” basement asking if we could play bananagrams. I have got her addicted to that game; she loves it because she’s gotten better and better. We begged Mario to play with us, and he finally agreed.

After bananagrams, Ri and I went for a quick run/walk in the woods. A few days ago, I made her go on a run/walk with me to try to get her ready for soccer conditioning. She had absolutely no desire to go. However, when we had run/walked our 2 miles and we’re heading home, she admitted that it wasn’t as bad as she thought it would be. She has gone on a run/walk with me every day since. Don’t get me wrong, I still have to beg her, but she will throw on her gym shoes and eventually talk to me during the trip. It is such a gift to “coach” her in running and spend tine with her outdoors. I know she doesn’t appreciate it as much as I do, but hopefully she will have fond memories when she gets older:) Isn’t that always how it works?

We browsed the Internet after we got home to see what we could do for the rest of the day. It looked like rain was coming in the late afternoon so we nixed the idea of heading to a waterpark. I wanted Darby Creek; the kids wanted ziplining. The only place that was close and halfway reasonable in cost was Camp Mary Orten – the ziplining place we went to about five years ago. Mario was so scared to zipline that he had to go with the instructor on every line except for the very last one. The instructor could not hold him because the line went too fast. I remember him begging and pleading to just give him one more minute before he had to go by himself. After five minutes, he finally did it, and loved it. Then, of course, after the very last line, he begged to do the course again by himself.

This time around, I could still see some nervousness in him, but he did all the lines on his own. He even showed off here and there by stepping his heels off the platform and looking down to the land far below. Maria, as always, was the complete daredevil ready and willing to do whatever stunt they suggested. She loved the trust fall zip line where you go backwards and can hold the rope really low so it feels like you are going to fall to the Earth. A nightmare for me but a pure Adrenalin rush for her. Mario loved the super fast zip line at the end of the course. He loved the speed. They both loved seeing my terrified face as I zipped through the forests. They thought my eyes were going to pop out of my face on the trust fall.

After ziplining, we stopped off at the house to throw on our swimsuits and headed straight to the pool to cool off. We made it right at 5 pm so we could get a full 45 minutes in before adult swim. Mario dunked Ri over and over and then insisted we play the color game (don’t ask). We jumped off the diving boards and went down the slides. It was heaven.

Then we hopped back in the car to drive home and order Chipotle for dinner – the kids’ one wish for the evening. After eating our Chipotle and watching the Office, we began our board game Olympics, which consisted of Bananagrams, Settlers of Catan, 2 games of Crazy Eights, and the Scrambled States of America. Ri won 3 and Mario won 2 (yes, I won none). Mario took it like a champ without ruining the night with a tantrum (Ri could have just as easily ruined the night with a tantrum if she had lost – she’s ms. competitive lately).

Ri held an award ceremony (I had to sit on the ground as the third place loser, Mario knelt as second place, and Ri stood as first place). We talked about what athletic events we would engage in the next day since Ri promised Mario we’d engage in athletic competition as well as board games competition. We topped the night off with the kids wrestling in the living room as I commentated on their different moves (one of their most enjoyable activities):) Nine times out of ten this ends poorly but they promised they wouldn’t get in a fight, and they actually came through with their promise. It ended in laughter, and all of us heading to our rooms for a sweet night’s sleep.

Pain is your professor

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Sometimes it just sucks being a mom.

Maria decided to go out for class president. She has been working on her speech and answering questions as to why she would want to be president for two weeks. A few evenings ago, she found out that the speeches were being made the next morning and that the four other classmates she was running against were bringing in donuts and candy. We made a last minute run to Big Lots to get Ziploc bags, tons of cookies, laffy taffy, and bubblegum.

Earlier in the evening, she printed out the names of all of the people in her class and made a tally of (1) who would vote for her; (2) who may vote for her but may vote for another classmate; and (3) who would not vote for her and would vote for another classmate. She chatted about her tally sheet with Jon the entire way to her PT appointment. He was impressed with her polling skills.

She also spoke to some of the girls in her class and determined that they would actually listen to the speeches and vote for the candidate who who would represent them the best. As for the boys, she determined that they would simply vote for whoever bribed them with the best treats. Hence, why she overloaded ziploc bags with cookies, laffy taffy, and gum.

We sat in the kitchen stuffing the bags while reviewing her speech and making tweaks to it. Her theme earlier in the week had been to ensure everyone felt safe at school. However, she changed her theme last minute because another girl had the same theme. I’m not sure if that girl had the theme long before Maria or Maria had it first but no matter what, I knew it was too late in the game to question her decision to change. Her new theme was that everyone should have a voice at school. She promised if she became president, she would make sure to listen to everyone and work on implementing classmates’ ideas to improve the school. She also talked about wanting their freshman year to be a lot of fun (because she has so much fun at school and wants to spread the joy). She only had under a minute to make her speech so she couldn’t get into too much detail. After numerous tweaks, she felt comfortable with it and rehearsed it several times to make sure it was under one minute. She ended her speech with a slogan she created while walking through Big Lots earlier in the evening: “Vote Maria, its a great idea!”

She snap chatted with her two girlfriends (heaven forbid they call each other) to confirm they would pass out bags with her during the morning before school.

I think she believed she would win. She seemed confident in the morning when she was making her breakfast. I told her she would do an amazing job and to just make sure she looked up from her paper and made eye contact with people. Jon and I both thought she had a good chance of winning as well.

I got a call from her an hour and a half later. I thought she was calling to tell me that she made it through her speech since the night before she had told Jon and I that she would not get the results until the day after her speech). When I clicked over from my other call to talk to her, all I heard were sobs.

My heart sank.

I thought she was going to tell me that she made a horrible speech but instead, she told me that she did not get the presidency. She could barely get out any other words to me. I tried to soothe her. I reiterated how proud her dad and I were for her running for the presidency and how this will make her stronger in the long run. I told her to be gracious to the winner. I reiterated again how proud we were of her throwing her hat in the ring. I did not want her to stop taking risks based on this loss.

I heard some girls’ voices in the background as I continued talking to her and realized she was standing in the bathroom stall. I asked if her friends were around her. She affirmed they were. I advised that she lean on them for support through the school day. She agreed. We both said “love you” and she hung up.

OK, my first instinct: slap all the kids who did not vote for her. Second instinct: tell her all the kids that did not vote for her are idiots. Third instinct: ask for a revote.

Fourth instinct: take a chill pill. Replay the Glennon Doyle podcast in your head.

Pain is your professor.

She will grow from this incident. It will make her more resilient and wise. There is conflict between the desire to protect your little one from pain and the desire to have your little one takes leaps and bounds while on this earth. But it is impossible to protect from pain so my role is to help her understand that pain is growth. Pain is not a bad thing. Pain is her professor.

Jon called me later in the day and told me that he had called Maria at lunchtime. Of course, I had tried to call her several times and she did not answer the phone. But when her dad calls…. She told him that she ended up in second place and that she would still be a representative on Council. He said that she sounded much better.

Of course she did. She is building that resilience.

Happy 14th birthday Ri!

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I thought 13 would kill me. I was wrong. 14 is taking me down. How has this munch been on this planet for 14 years?

This year has brought 8th grade and a continued desire for school to last all year-round. She loves it. Her favorite thing about Summer is back-to-school shopping. She’s a freak, as Mario points out. She loves being with her friends throughout the day; she loves the structure and routine; and she loves her teachers. What’s that I heard about the math teacher? He’s mean? Not in Maria’s eyes-she thinks he’s the bomb.com. There is nothing she she complains about when it comes to school.

This year brought basketball. It also brought soccer and softball but I mention basketball because she swore she would never play the sport again. But when friends call, she can’t help but answer. They needed one more person for the team, and she agreed even though she readily declares her hatred for the sport (she did manage to score a few baskets this year) It is clear that her main drive for being on a sports team is not to actually develop in the sport and become elite, but rather, to embolden her relationships with her girlfriends. I will never forget her response to a teammate who scored a soccer goal after Ri came out of the game. She jumped up and down and hugged her when she came in for water. She was genuinely happy for her and could care less that it was not her who scored. She’s a team player to the nth degree. Coaches love her for it and rely on her to keep the other girls in line (right or wrong). She’s the mother hen of the bunch in every sport.

She gets along with everyone. She sees the good in all of her classmates, and is always ready to stand up for them if someone questions them. She is able to hang out with a wide range of gals, and still prefers being with a big group rather than one friend. She wants to be the host with the most when she has friends over – an abundance of snacks and drinks and an assurance that each friend has a snack she enjoys. She will undoubtedly host some sweet parties. Being with friends was the only reason she walked to school every day!

She fell madly in love with Blake Shelton (she still adores Patrick Swayze but he got pushed to the side a bit). She only asked for VIP tickets to the Blake Shelton concert in Pittsburgh in February. She got more than she could imagine when he dedicated a song to her and threw her his guitar pick. That could have been not only a Christmas present but a birthday present, Easter present, and Fourth of July present!

She experienced Washington DC with her eighth-grade class. I will never forget her walking through the back door after Jon picked her up from the school at 10 PM at night. She was bawling and I ran towards the door to ask her what was wrong. She struggled to get out the words:

“I miss my friends so much. I just want to be back in DC. We will never have that time back again. I just want to be back there!”

Like I said, she loves big groups of people. She thrives in that atmosphere.

She got chosen to be on the student council this year and is applying to be student council president next year as a freshman. She sets her goals high. I love that she is not fearful of the risk of disappointment. She just dives in and goes for it. She certainly does not have any fear of getting up in front of her classmates.

She got asked to be a junior bridesmaid for my cousin’s wedding in July. If we weren’t convinced that she loves a good party with s Tom of people, we are now. She soaked in the frivolity of the two evening affair and fit in just perfectly with the 20 somethings (yikes!). She rode from the church to the reception hall in the party limousine with the wedding party, even:) She didn’t want Jon or I anywhere in site. This was her evening to shine and my god, she did!

This is the year that she has retreated down to the basement. She loves to sit on the gray couch with her computer on her lap and watch Grey’s Anatomy or the latest YouTube tutorial. She has taken to sleeping down there, and we are close to agreeing it can be her bedroom. She loves the privacy. We have a shower down there so she can get herself ready to go in the mornings without seeing any of us! She gets up before the crack of dawn unlike any of the rest of us and likes the hour and a half of time to do her thing. We still aren’t quite sure what “her thing” is that she does besides straightening her hair at times, hopefully doing her ankle exercises, getting clothes together for practice, and eating her bowl of cereal. And, of course, staring at her phone.

She is still smitten with her cousin, Elena. She will do anything for that girl, including taking a long walk because she wants to ride her bike to the pancake restaurant. She won’t do that for anybody else. Their relationship is as sweet as can be with Elena still calling Maria “Meemaw” and enbracing her fiercely when they see each other. Elena still has moments of frustration with Meemaw and Ri has times where she wishes she was back at home in her basement by herself, but inevitably, every time we leave her, Maria misses that little girl immensely.

Ri is heading to high school next year. How is that at all possible? I remember back to when she was 9 months old and clinging to me. All I could think was “one day she will be able to do things on her own, feed herself, get dressed…and I can have some time to myself.” Shit, what was I thinking? I want that 9 month-old back so badly just to be able to feel her cling, and smell her skin, and kiss all over her head and toes. However, I also want this teenage girl who is finding her voice and navigating her way through this crazy life.

She only has four more years with us and then she’s off to college (she has made it very clear she will be off to college) and I will not only miss her clinging but I will simply miss her face. It’s really hard to think about not seeing her every day. But, I’m jumping ahead. I need to absorb all things Maria while I have her here. And there is so much to absorb.

If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.

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Maria, Mario, and I took advantage of the 70° weather by throwing on our baseball mitts and tossing the ball in the front yard. We have enough space to stand 30 feet apart – enough distance for a decent throw but not so much that you can’t converse.

Maria talked about her birthday party – the hotel she wants to book, the restaurant she wants to eat at, the presents she’d love to get. Mario interrupted frequently asking her important questions like “what friends are you inviting” and “what day is your birthday?”

When Maria finished with her birthday party ideas, Mario began in on fifth grade camp. He was bummed he didn’t get a camp counselor he wanted but excited he got to be with his best friend, Owen. Maria gave him insight on activities he’d love and ones he’d hate. At first he didn’t want to hear them but then he got intrigued.

We laughed as Mario ran into a branch on our magnolia tree.

These are the moments I so love, and what I crave after a day at work. The connection lifts me up and energizes me. It’s such a simple act – tossing the ball from one glove to the next and chatting about our lives – that it doesn’t seem to correlate with the immense feeling of joy that overcomes me. It’s taken hard work and years of reflection to soak in those ordinary moments and feel the joy I do in them. I recently discovered a quote that I want to use for moments like these that will serve to further seal the joy in my heart. Kurt Vonnegut writes in one of his essays, quoting his uncle: “I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, ‘if this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.'”

“If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.”

Armpits

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One person’s sweat stains are another person’s armpit hair. Huh?

This is going to be my new idiom if someone confides in me about being embarrassed in a situation. My 14-year-old self came back in full force on Monday night when I attended Maria’s last dance club session. It all started with the parents being called out to the cafeteria floor to dance with their kids. The first dance involved some type of shuffle moving eight pieces to the right and then eight paces to the left and then kicking your legs and then swirling your hips. I, of course, got all into it (but without being over-the-top – sometimes I hoot and holler as I’m dancing). We ended the dance with a couple of fortnight dance moves, which the dance instructor found hilarious watching the parents perform. Something came over me and I was able to crank out the orange justice like a master. When the music stopped, the dance instructor spoke into his microphone:

“Ladies and gentlemen, this mom here in the green sweatshirt has done the best orange justice moves I have ever seen!”

Yes, he was talking about me, and Maria wanted to die. She put her hands against her face and shook her head. After the shuffle, the instructor placed the parents and kids into three big circles. He started the music and called out for a female or male student or female or male parent to go in the center of the circle and dance. He called a few students first and they went in the middle and did random moves that everyone else mimicked. Then he called for a female parent. Somebody pointed at one of the moms who is very timid. She shook her head no over and over again. My one girlfriend who loves to dance as much as I do whispered to me that we should go out and dance with her. Without hesitation, we both ran out to the dance floor and pulled her into the middle. We proceeded to do the Arnold dance moves and the Saturday Night Live move. Then we held our hands high in the sky and did some type of crazy jump step move. The dance instructor called out for a father to go in the middle of the circle so me and my girlfriend skipped back to our places on the outer rim of the circle. Maria winced when I stood next to her.

“What?”

“Mom, you have sweat stains in your arm pits and everyone saw them.”

My heart dropped to my knees. There I was standing at Golf Manor pool with my friends as my mom walked in wearing her string cotton bikini and sporting her 6 inch long armpit hair for all to see.

I left Maria’s side and jetted to the bathroom. Yep, sure enough, there were my big pit stains as I raised my hands overhead. That is what happens after 15 minutes of dancing. Hell, I probably had them after the first minute. I took off my green sweatshirt and wrapped it around my middle. I had a black long sleeve shirt on underneath which did not show the stains. I always come prepared. I left the bathroom and went back to the outer rim of the circle to stand by Maria. She looked appalled. I immediately felt it and left the circle to stand with Jon. After that dance scenario, the instructor told everyone to get ready for one more fast dance sequence. As Maria walked over towards Jon and I, she mouthed “go home.” Her words were a knife stabbing me in the heart. I was both hurt and pissed. Jon was just pissed. I told him we should leave, but he kept a level head and said that we were going to stay (but he was not going to talk to her the whole way home). We stood there glaring at her as she moved with her classmates to the music. She knew she had crossed the boundaries.

The instructor turned on one last piece of music – a slow song to end the night. Maria came over to Jon and I and asked if we would dance. Jon shook his head no. A few of my girlfriends were calling me onto the dance floor and in order to avoid a big scene, I walked over with Maria. We all danced together and made small talk but when music ended, I walked away.

I had told Maria that she would have to walk home with me since she didn’t walk to the dance, and I held her to it even though I was mad at her. She apologized over and over again as we walked towards the house. I didn’t accept her apology or deny it. I just listened to her and walked in silence. I knew I was heavily affected by the exchange based on my own experience with my mom when I was her age. Of course, I was also not happy with her conduct towards us, but I could understand it having once been a 14-year-old girl in a similar situation. I knew she did not intend to be mean spirited; she was just reacting in the moment with all of her friends by her. She has always been one that is quick to embarrassment by her family. I can’t blame her at times with how unfiltered we can be.

We went into our separate rooms once we got home. I turned on some music and folded laundry. About 20 minutes later, Maria peeked her head inside my bedroom. I knew right then and there that I needed to give her a hug. We embraced and I started crying. And crying. Maria sat me on the bed next to her and we talked. We talked about my experience with my mom. We talked about how embarrassed she gets at times over me and Jon. We laughed. We hugged again. Then Mario walked in and said something ridiculous, and we added him to our embrace.

We all walked downstairs to grab a snack before bed. Jon walked in from his office and stood stoic in front of Maria. She apologized for telling him to go home. He gave her some crap for a minute or two but then he apologized, too, for embarrassing her (according to Ri, he had talked with, and jabbed at, the boys in her class for too long of a period of time and ate pizza that was for the kids).

Mario enjoyed the whole show laid out in front of him. However, he will be in the same boat in two years when he does dance club. I’m going to make sure to wear a pastel shirt so that the sweat stains are everywhere.

Tender Mario moves

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I woke up the other morning to a horrible cough. This happens to me more often as I get older. I can’t catch my breath and as I try to take a deep inhale, I cough worse. Anyway, my coughing woke Mario up from his sleep (he had had a nightmare earlier in the evening and we allowed him to sleep in our bed). It was a good thing it did because it was 7 AM and a school day. Mario jumped out of bed to head into our bathroom to take a shower. I heard him turn on the water faucet, and opened one eye when I felt him standing next to me a second later. He whispered “here mom, take a drink.” It was such a tender gesture from him. I grabbed the cup and watched him head back into the bathroom.

I came home from work a few days ago and Mario popped up from the downstairs. He gave me a big hug and told me he did the dishes. I looked in the sink and sure enough, they were all washed and placed haphazardly in the plastic drainer on the left side of the sink. After Mario washes bowls, he places them right side up so the water remains in them. It drives me crazy but I won’t complain since he took the initiative to do the dishes in the first place.

We finally got to Dick’s Sporting Goods this weekend to get Mario a new pair of gym shoes. He is definitely his mother’s child when it comes to his love for gym shoes. His Adidas were completely worn down with a hole in the toe and huge rip in the heel lining. He eyed quite a few basketball shoes before he chose his black and gold LeBrons (he knew I could not say no to anything LeBron-related). After he got his shoes from the salesman, he led me over to the women’s running shoe area. He was set on getting me a pair as well. I told him that I was good to go and we were just there to get him shoes. But, he was adamant that he wanted me to be able to experience the joy of getting a new pair of shoes as well.

On Saturday morning, I was lifting weights at the gym when I saw Mario’s number pop up. I answered the phone and he asked where I was. I told him I was at the gym, and he told me that he would walk to Stauf’s with me when I got home. The offer to walk to Stauf’s with me is equivalent to an offer to give me $25K. I would take the walk and time at Stauf’s over cash any day.

Mario and I walked to school together last week. I dropped him off to the basketball game. We talked about his favorite songs and about his plan to watch a movie a week this Summer with his buddies. As we talked and walked, he reached for my hand and held as we continued our stroll down the street. No big gesture on his part – just a gentle embrace of his left hand with my right as he continued his conversation with me.

We were eating dinner the other night – Jon and Mario and I (Maria was at dance club) – and out of nowhere Mario blurted out “I have the best mom – she plays basketball with me and always has fun.” Then he continued to eat his pasta and talk about roller skating in gym class.

Come on Down!

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Yeah, that’s right. Jon and I got to be in the audience at The Price is Right. Now, let me clarify. We did not go to the Price is Right in California. We got to attend the traveling Price is Right right here in our hometown! Not quite the same as California but a decent imitation. I grew up on The Price is Right. I walked home from my grade school at lunch to watch the show. I’d heat up Mac-n-cheese in the stove and run upstairs to catch contestants spin the big wheel and bid in the showcase showdown. My memories of the show involve Bob Barker and the three models in their short dresses and perky smiles. I used to dream about being selected as a contestant, acting spastic as I won the bid, busting out the $1.00 on the Big Wheel, and winning the car in the showcase showdown. But those dreams ended at age 14 when I stopped watching the show; my high school was too far away to head home at lunch.

I quickly realized that I was an old school fan who loved the nostalgia of being a kid in the 80s just as much as I loved the show itself. It was a part of my childhood; a memory I enjoyed thinking about and reliving when I saw old clips on You Tube or when my kids asked what shows I liked as a kid. I came to this realization when I walked through the doors to register as a contestant and saw women in homemade Bob Barker T-shirts, men dressed in big wheel costumes, and couples dressed up as cartoon characters or Drew Carey and the Price is Right models. It was quite a sight to behold. They were serious, serious fans.

They would not allow me to register Jon as a contestant since you had to be there in person. Jon decided that he wanted to allow me to have all the glory and be the only one that registered with the chance to get on stage. I know in my heart of hearts, that if he would’ve registered, they would have pulled his name. He gets so lucky that way. And, he would’ve guessed all of the correct prices just like he did sitting next to me in the audience. But the line was 100 people deep when we got back to the Theatre, and we did not feel like waiting outside.

Jon bought premier seats for us. We were in the second row and could see the stage perfectly (we joked that we should’ve gotten the Price is Right seats for the John Cusack event and the John Cusack seats for the Price is Right). However, the front seats did mean that I got to see the big wheel when it came out in all of its glory. It did not disappoint with its colors and ding ding ding sounds as it spins; I remember vividly from all the years listening at home.

There was a gentleman sitting in the front row across the aisle from us who had Jon and I in stitches. He crossed his index and middle finger before every name that was called with the hopes that his name would be called. He laughed hysterically at everything, and was having the time of his life. He gave high-fives to all the contestants that “came on down” and yelled out prices to them with the hopes they would win big. He was all into it. I was hoping the host would bring him on stage just because he was so incredibly excited about the entire event but he never got up there.

Alas, my name never got called but it was still quite an experience for Jon and me. I am convinced it will be the one and only experience for us unless we end up out in California on the real show – but Bob Barker and the three models would need to come back, too.

We ended the night as winners, nonetheless. We devoured some White Castle hamburgers and onion chips on our way home.

Time together

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Christmas was on a Tuesday this year, which meant I got to torture the kids with my presence for four days straight. It made me feel totally loved when we woke up on Friday morning (the kids first day off), and Maria’s first question to me as I headed downstairs was “don’t you have to work today?” The inflection in her voice made it clear she was not asking, she was hoping. The kiddos know when I’m home there will be some walking involved with the day. And some reading. And maybe even a household task. There will also be game playing and frivolity but they focus on the former activities much more.

Maria got what she wanted – I did head to work – but not before I got a walk in with her beforehand:) She and I and Rocco took a walk to the woods. She shot some good pictures of the bare trees and little white mushrooms growing on dead branches. As much as she complains about the walk, I think she secretly likes to get out. Not for long, for sure, but 15 minutes does her well. And, 15 minutes for me with her or Mario makes my day. It’s grounds me and puts me in an upbeat mood as I head off to make the bacon.

Over the four day’s before Christmas, the kids humored me with my requests for walks to the woods. They even talked with me during our walks. I make it hard not to talk to me by coming up with new games to play or asking questions that I know will interest them (Maria – what’s new with Blake Shelton; Mario – how are the Rockets doing). I think if I had one last wish before I passed on, it would be to take a walk with my kids. I love having them near me and listening to their banter even if it’s about the Kardashians or Fortnite, My spirit is full after time with them.

We also got our fill of boardgames. I crushed the kids at Family Feud. To be fair, they don’t have years of experience like I do of watching the show from the ages of 9 to 14. I innately know what “the survey says.” I amazed my kids with my knowledge of “name six items a man thinks he can fix but usually can’t” (I think I got that answer correct due to being with Jon all these years versus my years of playing). We also got a brand new deck of “beat the parents” cards. Jon and I agreed to go against Ri and Mario, and got on a correct answer streak to win the game. Jon stood up and pointed his fingers at them and yelled “in your face”! (I wonder where they get their competitive nature)?! Of course, I was standing right behind him cheering him on.

We also made cookies and the kids decorated. gingerbread house (we got two but the first crumbled after Ri tried to glue it together rather than use icing). As I sat on the kitchen floor wrapping presents, I looked up at them consumed in decorating their gingerbread house – Ri with her tongue out pasting a Starburst on the house and Mario with lips sealed tight working on a row of Dot candies along the roof. Those moments are a sort of prayer for me. I am consumed with love and comfort.

We played mini-hoop basketball in Mario’s room. Mario loves to play mini hoop when it gets cold outside. We have about three steps to move before we hit the hoop but he doesn’t care. He likes to ram past me and make slamdunks. Maria begged to take him on, and he finally acquiesced. She simply pushed him with one hand until she reached the hoop and then gently placed the ball into it. She finally agreed to try some new moves, which led to a few pounces and bruises, but they ended the match shaking hands.

Christmas arrived on Tuesday and the kids were scattered around their cousins and other family members. There was no morning walk or mad game of Family Feud. But there was those few moments – when Ri came from behind to give me a bear hug, and Mario beamed when he talked about going to the UC Bearcat game with me, and both kids stared with those bold blue eyes into my camera as I flashed a holiday picture – when I felt at complete peace and as though nothing at all could be better.

Hip Hop Nutcracker

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As I scrolled through Facebook a couple of months ago, an ad for the Hip-Hop Nutcracker popped up. Since having kids, I have felt a tinge of jealousy towards families who post pictures of themselves all dressed up at the Nutcracker. Every year, I ponder the idea of dressing up and hitting that seasonal favorite. However, I never get around to it. December hits and it is a mad flurry of shopping, last-minute deadlines, parties, you name it. Besides, I did not think Mario or Maria would care for the show too much. It is long and neither of them enjoy watching ballet.

But when the Hip Hop Nutcracker ad came in view, I thought “this may be a possibility.” I have been struggling with things to do with the kids together. Mario loves movies; Maria does not. Maria loves to bake cookies; Mario does not. Neither off them ever want to take a walk with me! They have completely different interests now that they are older. But neither of them have had the chance to experience the Hip Hop Nutcracker so they couldn’t really say no to the invite in good faith. And besides, I did think Mario, at least, would enjoy it. He loves to watch old-school 80s rap videos with me and has quite a few hip-hop moves he has mastered. I wavered about whether Maria would enjoy it, on the other hand, since she was not a hip hop fan. How I gave birth to a child who loves country music is beyond me. After thinking about it some more, I decided that I would invite a few of Maria’s friends and their moms in order for Maria to have some girlfriends attend the show with her. Four other moms immediately responded that they would love to go with me.

We decided to go to Northstar for dinner before the show. I let Mario skip out on dinner with all of the women and girls and go to Subway with Jon instead. The North Star dinner was delicious, and I had a great time talking with fellow moms. Maria and her girlfriends sat at another table. They ordered smoothies and meals, and giggled most of the time. After dinner, they begged to have five dollars each to go across the street to a gourmet candy shop. Meanwhile, another mom and I stashed some giant, warm cookies to eat during the show.

After the girls spent what seemed like hours at the candy shop, we headed down to the Palace Theatre. One of the moms drove us, and somehow was able to get the very first parking spot in the parking garage. I will drive with her all the time with that luck. Mario met us at the front doors and we went up to our seats. But first, of course, I had to get the obligatory pictures.

The show began with the emcee and the DJ on the stage. The MC got the audience pumped up by rapping and playing old-school 80s jams. All of the moms stood up and hollered and danced for the first 20 minutes of the show to the embarrassment of all the teen girls in front of us. Maria and Mario kept looking at me with eyes blazing “sit down mom!” Mario tugged on me a few times but eventually they both gave up on their pleading because they knew I would not stop. As the show began, we settled down in our seats. I sat next to Mario and loved every second of it. The athleticism of the dancers was amazing. They also did a few dance moves that Mario does currently so that made us smile. Of course, when one of the dancers came out and spun on top of his head for a full 20 seconds, Mario looked at me and quipped “I could easily do that” (I did make him try it when we got home and although he could stand on his head, that was about the end of it.).

During intermission, I asked the girls how they liked it. They all smiled and said that it was good. I don’t know if they just knew that I am the one that got the event together so they did not want to disappoint me or whether they really liked it. Meanwhile, my daughter gave me the straight up truth. She did not really like the music but the show was “OK.” Mario told me that he was enjoying it. I don’t know if he truly liked it or whether he knew how excited I was about it so he did not want to burst my bubble. That kid loves to see me happy. During most of the show, he held my hand and waved it around when the emcee told us to dance. He’s my bud, for sure.

At the end, the emcee came out and let us engage in one more jam session before the end of the night. It was a blast. I think Maria and Mario may have been bored at times during the show but I think in the end when they were laying in their beds getting ready to sleep, they would say that it was a good time.