Tag: Preschool

Graduation

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My oldest child graduated. 

Maria celebrating her "diploma"

No, not from high school or college.  From pre-school.  Yes, you heard it right.  Pre-school. Other mothers are shaking their heads thinking about the time that Georgie or Mandy graduated from pre-school and how silly they felt making such a big deal over it but how they could not stop themselves either.  Women who are not mothers are shaking their heads and laughing hysterically at the insanity of hosting a graduation for a pre-schooler. 

I remember reading a passage out of Laurie Moore’s novel where the lead woman character was discussing her

Maria and one of her teachers

 wedding day.  She surmised that it is not the actual marriage that is so important – it is the memories and milestones you take from the event that mark your life and allow you to remember important times.  That is how I feel about Ri’s graduation.  It is not so much the graduation certificate but the memories of the event itself with Grandma and Grandpas there; Mario running around wanting to snatch a cookie; Maria excited and anxious to get her certificate and hug her teachers.   

Maria was radiant wearing her shimmery green dress and egyptian silver sandals.  She smiled and waved to us as she stood waiting for her graduation certificate.  All I could think about was “Is she really going to get taller, grow hair under her arms, get breasts, and eventually become an adult like me?  It seems impossible. Kindergarten is going to be a whirlwind for her at first – she tends to have a lot of her dad in her and one area that she really has him in her is when it comes to meeting new people.  She likes her small “posse” of friends and becomes very shy when others enter the mix.  If not shy, she becomes stand-offish and even rude.  So, kindergarten should be interesting.  She does have one friend from pre-school in her class so that will help.

Go Maria!

I gotta face the fact that she is starting school and with school comes cliques and heartbreaks and hurt feelings.  As my friend says to me when her daughter tells her that someone hurt her feelings at school “I just want to go up to that kid and tell her that if she hurts my little girl’s feelings, I am going to have to hurt her!”   But with school comes friendships and sisterhood and learning and interests, also.  Here’s to kindergarten and Maria finding a lot more in the latter category than in the former.  Go Maria!    

The Relief of a Good Drop-Off and Night with Family

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Sitting on our bed post ready for school

I took Mario into daycare today with Maria.  We had a pretty good morning with a healthy dose of tv, waffles, play, self dress, and more tv.  I got home from my run and the kids were already dressed so they got to watch another show while I showered.  Mario also scored a cereal bar on the way out the door since I did not know how much he ate for breakfast.  On the way to the car, we stopped and looked at Cy’s poop , which is always a source of amazement and disgust (“Mom, do you smell it?!”).  Maria was once fascinated about it but she has since “grown” out of that stage and now just rolls her eyes each time Mario points it out as if she is 13 years old dealing with her babyish 2-year-old brother.  Mario also got to open the car door himself and get in his car seat himself.  Some mornings he could care less if I help him and other mornings when I go to swoop him up into the seat, he screams and cries as if a horrific, disgusting sea monster had just grabbed him with its tentacles and taken him out to sea.  He flails his body and growls and cries “Nooooo!”  And he can never recover.  He gets so angry that he cannot let go of the emotion for a long while.  Much longer than the time it takes to daycare.  So, this was a good morning because he climbed in the seat himself.  We sang “Free to Be You and Me” all the way to school, which really put me in a pleasant mood since it brings back times of my childhood. 

We pulled into school and took our time getting out of the car (another necessity because any type of hurried behavior can set Mario over the edge, too).  I kept telling Mario about all the fun things they were going to do at school today like water play and telling time.  Maria even helped me out.  She can totally read when I need her to help me.  As we walked down the preschool hall, I chirped “everyone wants to be in Mr. Parks’ room!”  Maria looked at me and without hesitation exclaimed “I wish I could be in your classroom, Mario – that would be cool!” even though I know that she really would not want to be in that classroom.  That is my girl. 

We got some animals from Maria’s room that Mario loves to play with and took them to his room.  Finally, we waltzed down to Amanda’s room to say to his old teacher and then waltzed back to preschool.  After all of that, Mario stood in his classroom as I said goodbye and did not ball and wail and cry hysterically.  Yippee!  It only took an extra hour of time and nonstop codling.  We are set now! 

Seriously, though, I do think I would stand on my head on a bed of nails in order to see Mario happy in his preschool room.  It just makes my day so much easier.  I can get more done, my mood is up, my mind is uncluttered.   Jon has drop off duty tomorrow so hopefully it will go just as well.

The kiddies from our weekend get together where they learned how much fun the hose is to play with in this heat

We had a great night tonight with visiting brothers and sisters-in-law and nieces and nephews and cousins.  Maria’s two older cousins, Emi and Elly, are fantastic to have around because they are so good with Maria and Mario.  M&M adore them, too.  We also had Maria’s newest cousin over to the house, Dagmawit.  Jon’s brother, Kevin and his wife Margie adopted her from Ethiopia recently and it was her first time to visit us.  She is a gem of a kid.  She and Maria are very similar in personality – opinionated, direct, and strong-willed.  Maybe it has to do with their moms’ personalities! 

Mario in his dress, headband, make-up and shoes - What a trooper!

The girls dressed Mario up in girl clothes and smothered him in make-up.  Mario is the good sport through it all even modeling for us as he came outside.  Maria and Dagmawit got dolled up by Emi and Elly.  After dinner, they all threw on bathing suits and played in the baby pool with the hose.  The adults actually got to talk together for an hour without being interrupted every 15 seconds.  Very strange….

I love nights like tonight – surrounded by family, good food and drink, great conversation, laughter.  The night even ended well with Maria and Mario on my lap in the rocking chair making up stories about baby bunnies and giraffes who fall in love.  Life is good.

Awful Daycare Days

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Mario in his "old" toddler room

I took Mario to school this morning and this is what I got to hear:

“No, mommy, please don’t leave me here.”

“Mommy, let’s go home.”

“Mommy, please stay with me.”

Needless to say, when I walked out to my car, I was soaked from the tears streaming down my face.  Yes, that coming from a woman who prides herself on being strong and independent and fierce and tough.  One cry from my baby boy and I am shot.

Why can’t transitions from one classroom to another be less difficult?  Why can’t I have the kid that is always happy and content no matter where he is in the world?  I have a niece who seems to be like that.  She is always so excited to go to school. She loves her friends and her teachers.  She sits around on Sunday and talks about how excited she is for Monday morning.  Is there an “I love school” gene that I can extract from her to place into Maria and Mario? 

People tell me that the kids have too much fun at home and that is why they don’t like school.  Maybe they have a point since I am always doing things with them when I am home (they benefit from the guilty mom working outside of the home mom syndrome).  Maybe a little of their angst and crying is actually manipulation since they both know it breaks my heart to see them cry and I will usually give in on anything once they start it up.  No, it si more likely that they need to be with their mom more than they are and I am turning them into little monsters with ADHD and depression.  

Maria and her preschool friend

I have gone through this before with Maria.  She hated preschool when she first started and now she loves her girlfriends. She would probably still pick to be with me over going to school but once she is there, she has a good time.  Mario will get to that point to – I think…  He is an outgoing, fun-loving little guy and should be making lots of friends with his antics and collegiality.  But in the meantime, it breaks my heart to see him so sad when I leave. 

I did research on this issue (of course!) and almost every site mentioned that allowing your child to take a favorite toy or comfort item with them to school may assist with the transition.  They also mentioned having a “buddy” in the room from their old room may help.  I have been sending Mario in with his “blue blankie” and his “bink” everyday but I guess I do put them away immediately because I don’t want him walking around like Linus from Snoopy.  Maybe I could give him a picture of his mama and papa to put in his pocket and look at when he gets lonely.  It seems a little weird and egotistical though. Wait, I got it!! — I could just load his candy-loving self down with bags and bags of M&Ms everyday so he could concentrate on chowing those down until I returned.  He may get a tummy ache or a headache but then he could just sleep til I got there.  Yeah, I think I am onto something.   No, I think I am merely losing my mind with grief over my boy.  

In the end, he will survive.  He will grow up and be sitting at the kitchen table, age 16, and I will mention how I used to fret and worry about taking him to preschool each day and how he would cry for me and beg me to stay and wail until I gave him one more hug and kiss.  I will lean over to kiss his cheek and tell him I love him and he will push me away and snicker “Mom, those days are so, so gone.”   Yeah, that is when I will actually miss them.

Mario - already the teenager - sitting at the pool by himself eating Doritos

Growing Up

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My babies are growing up.  I remember when Maria was just a tiny 8 pound baby serious and somber. I remember when Mario was an 8 pound baby smiling and squirming everywhere.  And now here they are ages 5 and almost three.  Maria heading to kindergarten and Mario heading to preschool. 

Mario's picture on his door

Mario’s last “full” day in the toddler room was today; his teachers (who I adore) blew up a picture of him in his helmet to hang up on the door.  It included well wishes from them and the other toddlers.  Maria took one look at it and cooed at him “ahh, Mario, we love you – you are so cuuute!”  Amanda, the teacher who has been with him the longest, cried as we talked about his transition.  I am fairly calm about it at this stage but next week will likely throw me for a loop, especially if it is hard from him to transition.  I persevered through nearly three months of incessant crying each day I dropped him off until he finally got to the point of waving goodbye to me with a smile on his face.  I hope the same scenario will not occur again.  Maria is bummed he will not be in her room (even though she is only in her class another four weeks).  She wants to nurture him for as long as possible before she heads out to big K. 

Maria cuddling her borther after a swim

I will always remember an email that my dad sent to me a while back. I still have the email in my office to lift my spirits in time of need (and god knows there have been too many times lately!).  In part, he told me that he was incredibly happy that I was his oldest child because I was so good with my little sis and brother.  I feel the same way with Maria.  She is the best older sister a boy could have – funny, protective, daring, adventurous, warm, and generous. 

I think Mario will enjoy preschool – he adores learning and one of the preschool teachers is a science nut, which is right up Mario’s alley.  I think he will also continue his crazy antics and have all of his new friends in stitches within a couple of hours on his first day.  He is a born comedian. 

I think Maria will enjoy Kindergarten but I fear it may take her a little more time to get used to the new school, new friends, new teachers.  It took her some time to get used to the new friends at her current school.  She is very shy when she first meets kids her age and can be a little intimidating in her look (a total Jon characteristic!).  She gets nervous and withdrawn.  But, once she feels comfortable, she is just as crazy as her brother.  She is still into boys and boyfriends and dating.  It makes no sense to me.  Age 5.  How?  I struggle with whether to just forbid the talk in the house or to allow her to “let it out” with the hopes that she loses all interest by the age of 7.  Anyone had this issue and resolve it well?  Help a struggling mom out!

Maria "taking care of" her brother

There was a time years ago when I was complaining to a friend about how tired I was and irritable I was due to the lack of sleep from being up with a cranky, colicky Maria night after night.  My friend looked at me directly in the eyes and retorted “You will look back at these days and wonder how they darted by so fast.”  At the time, I wanted to smack her. Now, I see exactly what she meant.  I still remember those days of being so tired and irritable, and I am glad that I am not getting up every two hours with a crying baby.  But, they do seem like they were just here yesterday and old time has flown by past me shaking its head and sassing “told ya.”  Because of that, I am more conscious of my time with these babies.  I know the days of Mario lightly touching my cheek and whispering “I love you to the moon” are not going to last forever.  I understand that Maria’s wish to hang out with me every second of the day will not survive ten more years.  I want to embrace it while I can and hold it close to me.

M&M heading to school this summer