Canada or Bust

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“Should we take the kids to Toronto for the wedding?” 

“Would we drive?” 

“It will be too much to fly. It would be fun to see all of the Italian relatives.” 

“But we will be in a car for eight plus hours with the kids and your parents.” 

“Let’s flip a coin.” 

After much back and forth, we decided to go for it.  Pack the car up with lots of snacks and games and books and movies.  Pick up the in-laws in Marion, Ohio to head up to Toronto with us.  Make sure someone watches our pup for four days. Ensure the “out of office” is on our email.  Confirm Maria has her wedding dress she picked out from Target and her “high heels” that she demanded to where to the event.  

We picked the kids up early from school, which always results in exuberance and glee and spazzing out throughout the halls (teachers either love us or hate us based on our (or I should say mostly, my, “laissez faire” attitude with the children).  We headed up north to grandma and grandpa’s house, got on the road, and stopped within an hour to eat some Wendy’s fast food (yes, I enjoy my food stops!).  A few value meals and a round of frosty shakes and we were back in the car watching Pocahontas as we traveled towards Cleveland.  

About three hours later, 10:30 pm, we stopped at our hotel.  Maria and Mario were so excited about staying at a hotel that it took us an hour to get them to fall asleep.  Eventually, Mario ended up with me in my bed and Maria with Jon in his bed.  I don’t know which kid is worse to sleep with since Mario wakes up crying in the middle of the night not knowing where he is and Maria kicks around the bed all night.  

M&M trying to sleep on the floor but Mom's and Dad's beds were too tempting!

 

When we woke up on Friday morning, the first thing out of Maria’s mouth was “can we go to the pool?”  Mario chimed in with “yeah, let’s go NOW!”  We walked down to our breakfast buffet and each devoured vastly different breakfasts (Jon with his eggs and eggs and eggs; me with my numerous cereals and toast; Mario with his waffles and dabs of yogurt; and Maria with her hodge podge of waffles, various cereals in one bowl (her new favorite thing to do for breakfast), muffins, and toast).  After our meal, the kids and I jumped in our swim suits and headed to the hotel pool.  It was surprisingly warm.  We splashed around for an hour or so and then got the boot from dad and the in-laws who wanted to get on the road. 

The water babies

 

“Niagara Falls, here we come!”  

We all piled into the Yukon (which is a big automobile but with two kids, four adults and a good amount of luggage , food, and toys, it is cramped) and headed onward to Buffalo, New York.  We finally made it to the Falls (after swearing we were lost on a couple of occasions).  We decided not to park and walk to the Falls because of the rain and our desire to just get to Toronto (Maria later told her girlfriend who had gone to the Falls, too, that we just “drove by them.”  Lovely!).   

Although we could not stop at the Falls, we could stop for lunch!  We stopped at another Wendy’s along the Niagara strip and chowed down on nuggets, fries, and more frostys.  We jumped back in the truck, when within five minutes, we felt a drop on the right side of the car and a terrible grinding noise.  

“What the he–?” I whispered to Patty, Jon’s mom.  

Oh please  tell me that it is nothing and the noise will stop soon.  Yeah, wishful thinking.   

A flat tire due to a piece of aluminum lodged in the big ol’ Yukon tire.  

At least we were near a house with a gravel driveway.  We pulled over.  Jon and I tried to change the tire but that was quite the joke. The man who owned the house was in a mechanic’s suit and had a work van so I kept hoping he would pity us.  Jon and I had to look hilarious outside of the truck, combing through manual pages, sliding under the truck to try to find tools.  Finally, he came over to “see what we were up to” (a nice way of saying “you dumbasses, I want you off my property so I am gonna help you in whatever way I can).” 

Workin' on that tire!

 

He began to help us but Jon had already called Triple A to get a “professional” on the scene.  Luckily, the Triple A guy came in less than a half hour and had us fixed up in less than that time.  Meanwhile, Patty and I couldn’t help but roll about the whole event.  

“What’s next?!” 

Surprisingly, the trip was pretty quiet after that incident and we arrived at Philip and Lucy’s house (our cousins) at 5 or so.  Lucy had cooked for us (of course).  She had a salad with tomatoes that had been picked 6 months earlier!  Is that insane?  And they were delicious!  She also had pasta soup, bread, pizza, cheese, fried cheese dumplings, and chocolate chip cookies.  Ahh, heaven.  We ate and ate and ate.  Finally, we decided we had to hit the road for our hotel in order to get some sleep for the night.  

The hotel was very European in style with a crisp, white, modern lobby but very plain, sparse rooms with two beds, a tv and a bathroom.  Maria and Mario just wanted to know where the pool was located.  We jumped in our suits and headed down for a late night swim.  The pool was freezing!  Luckily, there was a tepid hot tub in the pool area, which Mario enjoyed thoroughly.  Jon sat in the hot tub with Mario for the most part, while I caught Maria jumping into the frozen pool.  We trekked it back upstairs to our room, got in our pjs, and goofed around the room until finally zonking out at 11:30.  That, to me, was the most memorable, wonderful time of the trip.  

The next morning, the kids and I went to the breakfast buffet bar, which was way too amazing for Maria and me.  We salivated with each step around the hotcakes, the donuts, the chocolate croissants, the bacon, the cereals.   Mario, on the other hand, could have cared less about it.  After stuffing ourselves, we headed to the pool (nothing better than being completely bloated from gorging on food and then stuffing yourself into a tight bathing suit).  Mario bolted to the tepid hot tub – he is so tiny and skinny that he immediately freezes when he gets into a pool that is not heated.  Of course, I made him get out of the tub every five minutes due to my fear that his organs would melt even though the water was tepid, and he sat on the top step the entire time kicking the water around.  Maria loved jumping in the water to me and then acting like I was her prince and we had just got married.  Yes, everything these days revolves around boyfriend and girlfriend and prince and princess – even swimming. 

We headed to the wedding that afternoon, which was beautiful, simple and very catholic.  After the wedding, the families hosted the guests in the downstairs of the church with prosciutto, olives, cheeses and bread.  Desserts and fruit, too.  We all chowed down only to be fed a seven course meal a few hours later at the reception.  Yes, these Italian weddings can pack on ten pounds in one day.  Maria fell back in love with her Italian cousin, 9 year-old Jean-Franco.  A couple of years ago they played around at another Italian wedding but he was younger then and a little more amenable to playing with a 3-year-old girl.  This time around, he is 9 and “mature” and she is just old enough at 5 to be “an annoying little girl” versus a cute little toddler.  However, she was still able to spend some time with him, lying her head on his arm while he played games on his i Touch (yeah, age 9).  As she confessed later to us in the car “that was my favorite part of the trip.”  Mario ran around like a mad man, sliding across the dance floor, making monster noises, and flirting with the hot Italian ladies.   

Maria dancing with her cousins

 

Mario passed out at 10:30 pm just like a frat boy who parties it up so hard through the night that he lays out flat in the middle of the room when it finally hits him.  Maria made it to her car seat but was out within five minutes.  It was actually snowing when we left the wedding (ahh, I miss that now that I am dealing with 87 degrees and humidity!). 

On Sunday, we promised we would get out quickly so we could deal with the traffic and we could get home at a reasonable time.  “Get out quickly” is not a term used in the Italian culture.  There was no way we were getting out of our cousins’ house without sitting down to a big ol’ Italian lunch of pasta, manicotti, shrimp, pizza.  I am not complaining by any stretch, however, because I enjoyed every minute of it, especially the act of just sitting around and talking, relaxing, catching up.  We don’t do that enough. 

Mario with his comfort items for the trip home (bink and blue blankie)

 

We took off around 1:3o with the stomachs full.  The ride home went amazingly well just like the ride to Canada.  The customs line was a little longer but we kept reading to the kids and singing songs and playing “three little pigs.” I was surprised at the amount of tv watching – I thought it would be on non-stop but we managed to only watch a video here or there.   Impressive! 

Maria passed out on Grandma

 

When we finally pulled into the neighborhood at 9:30 pm, we felt a sense of relief in being “back home” but also a sense of loss in leaving our gregarious, generous, warm family from up north.  If Maria has her way, we will be back up this Summer so she can again hang out with Jean-Franco because he is “sooooo cute!”

From Perfection to Grief to Perfection Again

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Maria starting the day with her yoga moves

We woke up this morning to a hazy, slightly chilly morning with no rain in sight and a double stroller screaming for a tour through the city.   Jon had gone East for one more try at turkey hunting, which left me for a second day of bliss with my darling children (Saturday had been filled with a three-hour b-day party at an indoor pool – fun for the kids, but afterwards every parent looked like they had gone through that negative gravity machine that Chevy Chase and Dan Akroyd were in for the movie Spies Like Us). 

I was not upset at Jon taking off for the day because it was going to be a gorgeous day, which inevitably lead to lots of bike rides, stroller rides, and walks.  Within an hour of waking, we were on the road in the double stroller with our stuffed monkey and dog, two blankets and obligatory binky ar we are going to get him off that thing by age 3 (it took Maria to 4 ½).  We headed down the road to Tim Horton’s for a breakfast of sugar and dough.  It was heaven. 

Mario enjoying his timbits!

 After breakfast, we headed across the road to a bike trail that we had not experienced because we typically headed down the opposite stretch of road.  The trail was gorgeous.  You felt like you were in a national forest at times with the tree cover and the rivers on both sides of you and the birds flying closely overhead singing their morning lullabies to you.  We stopped at a bank on the river to throw stones into the water (Mario could stay in that place for three hours and enjoy every second of it).  We also snagged some killer stones for our rock garden (Maria knows how much I love rocks and she presented me with a gorgeous red one wishing me a happy mother’s day (yes, she is still celebrating!)). 

We stopped on the way back to pick wild flowers and make a bouquet for grandma.  It was perfect.  We visited our friend Kim at the fire station and presented her with a few flowers, and then went home to get dressed (yes, the kiddies begged to stay in their nighties and I could not resist – they looked too precious on a Sunday morning). 

After a quick change, we hopped back outdoors and the kids jumped on their bikes to head to the little woods down the street (we went at Maria’s request – lately she has been wanting to take walks and hikes, which I immediately agree to in order to get her away from the tv and leapster).   Maria guided us through the woods to the fire station and back down to the park and back up to our bikes all the while finding us walking sticks and cool rocks. 

Maria and Mario enjoying their tree climbing

Mario loved climbing over the giant fallen tree trunks.  They both mentioned a few times while in the woods how they were “getting exercise” to keep them healthy (yes, my influence finally shines through!).  When we got back to our bikes, we were all drained and it was quite the chore to get home.  Maria ended up getting on Mario’s tiny toddler big wheel and Mario on Maria’s bike in order to keep them amused and doing something new.  We get home and all three of us plopped down on the front steps.

“What now?” I said to them.  “I am hungry.”

Maria seconded her hunger while Mario just stared at the ants crawling on the step below.  I suggested macaroni and cheese and Maria agreed at first.  Then, a few seconds later, she piped in with a question:

Mom, how about we get Jeni’s ice cream for lunch?” 

Normally, I would have been rationale and explained that lunch was a necessity before ice cream but it was Sunday, we were exhausted, and Jeni’s Dark Chocolate and Buckeye State ice creams sounded too tempting to nix.  So, off we were in the stroller to Jeni’s for our ice cream lunch.  While eating lunch, we decided the library was the next stop because we had run out of new books. 

The library slurped us up as always and we did not leave there until an hour and half later with new books in tow and a craft that Maria made me for Mom’s Day (yes, again!).  From the library, we walked to Giant Eagle for cheese, bananas, and squeeze yogurt (Mario’s new love – he chose the “I Carly” yogurt because “she is my girlfriend” – nice influence Maria!). 

We traveled back to the house after the grocery, and crashed on the couch with popcorn and a My Little Pony video (which was luckily only a half-hour ong).  I sat on the couch with Maria on one side and Mario on the other and felt that calm elation I get every once in a while when I have been through something great or I have heard a wonderful speech or I have finished an amazing book.  I was so pleased with life. 

Jon got home shortly thereafter, and I got packed up to head to Stauf’s for a bagel and coke and a little “me” time.  As I got my stuff together, Maria asked me to play barbies with her.  I told her I was going to meet a friend for coffee. 

She flipped out. 

She bawled.

 She went boneless.

 She sobbed. 

She screamed at me.  “I don’t like your friend, mom!”

What a grand send-off after a remarkable day. 

I tried to calm her down.  I hugged her.  I told her we’d go for a walk when I got home.  I told her I loved her to the moon.  Nothing worked.  She cried and begged to come with me. 

Ok, so do I take her?  I started to feel like I should or else she may feel like she has been abandoned or not loved?  But if I took her, she may never understand that her mother needs time with friends.  But she does see me go to work every day so she knows I have friends and activities outside of her.  But since I work every day, I should take her with me on the weekends.  And the voices continue and continue… 

I chose to leave and walk to Stauf’s.  It felt necessary to get away for a few minutes but the entire time I felt the pang of motherhood.  Did I scar Maria by leaving this afternoon?  Will she feel abandoned?  Will she be stronger because she knows mom can’t be there with her every second?  Will she be more independent now?    

An hour later, I walked up to the house and saw Maria in the side of the yard. 

“Mom! Can we go on a walk now?” 

M&M watching the circus horses coming down the street

Maria posing with the elephants

No grudge for leaving; no apparent scars; all smiles.  Ok, so maybe I do worry too much.  In any case, we are back to continuing our wonderful day.  Off to see the elephants and horses walking to the railroad from the circus!     

 

Maria’s 5th B-day

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Maria opening her Leapster b-day present

Maria turned 5 on May 2. It was official at 2:41 pm – I still remember laying on that hospital bed five years ago,seeing her head crown in the mirror, and getting that last burst of energy to push her out. And then … swoosh!  There she was…my daughter with her black hair and pug nose and tiny, sweet, doll-baby body.  And now here I was looking at that little munchball turning five.  My heart skipped beats throughout  the day thinking about her getting a year closer to teenage-hood.  Or, in looking back at that day, it could have been skipping due to the 21 kids we had running through our tiny house that afternoon.
  
I had been planning Maria’s soiree since she had decided to have her party at our house.  She wanted to invite all of her school friends, prior school friends, cousins, and neighborhood friends.  I had hoped that she would want it at a gym (like last year) or a pool – anywhere other than our tiny house!  But she is a home body, and she wanted it nowhere other than her own home.  And, she wanted a “girl” party with make-overs and nail polish and hair-dos.  But she also wanted to invite boys.

Maria taking charge at her b-day party

 
I spent hours perusing the internet for games and ideas for an at-home party.  It did not hit me until that day at how insane it was for me to research “how to have a party” for a five-year old.  Some of the sites were so intense that they had the party routine down to 15 minute increments (play hot potato from 1 to 1:15 and then move onto crafts  from 1:15 to 1:30 but don’t go to far over 1:30 because you will want to have room for the princess dance from 1:30 to 1:50…).  My psyche knew when to slow me down and I ended up picking only one game from my review of different sites and kept myself from going crazy by not trying to plan out every second of the day.
 
The kiddies and their parents began to arrive right at 2 pm.  Our humble 1200 square foot home remained in good spirits as people continued to step inside.  The girls bolted up to the bedroom for make-up and nails and hair.  I felt a little awkward at first because some kids did not know the others and some mothers the same,  Also, Maria immediately glued herself to certain girls and not others.  
 
“Come on, Ri, pay attention to all your guests.”
 
“I am mom!”
 
Eventually, I had that talk with my neurotic inner self and let go of my anxiety around everyone talking and knowing one another.  I just let it all be, and god, was it refreshing.  I found that as soon as I let it all go, I saw all the girls chatting and laughing; I saw parents engaging in lively conversation.  It really can come down to what colored glasses you choose to wear.     

Mario trying to break open the pinata

The boys of the group enjoyed the bouncy house that we had rented at the last-minute (a godsend!).  The weather held out for the first hour so the kids got to enjoy bouncin’ and running around the yard and the parents were able to head outside rather than squeeze in our kitchen and living room.  We even got to use the pinata I got from my Aunt Christina!  Of course, my dad and Jon had to get out their pocket knives and rip into the poor pinata in order to get it to open but we did make the kids close their eyes during that part!

  
Mario was the ultimate clingy son (he had stayed a couple of days with grandma and grandpa i. so he was wanting his mommy non-stop when he came home).  But once he saw the princess make-up, nails, and hair-dos happening upstairs, he became intrigued and went all out in goth black nail and toe polish and red lipstick smeared all over his lips, chin, and sides of his face).  We had princess tattoos for the girls and batman ones for the fellows – that was a hit that I did not expect (Mario still has his on his right arm after eight days). 
 
Maria became a tad overwhelmed toward the end of the party while opening her presents.  There were way too many gifts to open due to the amount of kids who came.  Next year, I have resolved to find a way to limit the gifts – maybe have families donate to their favorite cause or Maria’s favorite cause?  Who knows – I just don’t want to see 25 gifts in the living room for one little girl! 

Proud owner of a Barbie!

 
 Nonetheless, Maria was her sweet self and opened all of the presents and gave hugs and kisses to all of her friends (and very much enjoyed all of the presents that she got since the majority centered around barbies or make-up or princesses).  Of course, that was tempered after the party when I told her that she could not open a particular present until later.  She glared at me and said “I didn’t like my party, mom, and I don’t like you!”  Yeah, she is only 5.  I am in for it. 
 
But within 15 minutes she was back in my arms showing me her new musical jewelry box with the tiny fairy dancer – very similar to the one I used to have as a young girl – and I took full advantage of that moment with her knowing that it was too precious to take for granted.     
 
 
 

Maria blowing out those five magical candles and wishing for???

Sunday Run

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Maria hammin' it up

It was 10 am Sunday and we had played barbies, read books, ate cereal, and played “boathouse” when I decided to take a run.  NPR’s “Wait Wait, Don’t Tell Me” is on at 10 am on Sundays and I look forward to a 45 minute run while listening to that show.  Unfortunately, my children wanted nothing of the sort.  They both completely broke down when they saw me changing into my running gear.  

“No, mommy, please don’t run.  Please take us, mommy.”  

Mario enjoying his "horsey"

 

Maria chimed in “You told us no running today, mom.” 

To her credit, she is correct.  I usually say that on Saturday morning when I get up for my Saturday morning workout – “don’t worry, guys, I will not go tomorrow.”  Typically, it works out that I don’t go on Sundays but this was one Sunday that I could get out.  

Within 45 seconds, both of them had huge, heartbreaking tears running down their faces and were clinging to me as if it was my last day with them on Earth.  Jon kept pushing me to go and I wanted to so badly but…  I just couldn’t.  Call me weak, call me a sucker, call me a push-over.  I am probably all of them.  But, I could not leave them.  

So, they asked for it.  They got bundled up, I threw them in the stroller, and we were off.  When we first took off, I was hesitant to go too far because I had not run with them in the stroller for a while and my left IT band is killing me.  But, next thing I know, we are on the bike trail, playing the ABC game and looking at birds chirping up in still bare trees.  We strolled up to Route 33, which I thought would make them yell “That is enough mom” (it is about 2 miles from home) but instead they wanted more so we kept trekking.  We landed at Bicentennial Park with the statues that we used to visit when I worked downtown and they went to school downtown.  

Mario's serious pose

 

Maria remembered all of the statues, she remembered the “Dora Boat” (Santa Maria boat)’ she remembered going on the boat with her dad and me years ago and seeing different zoo animals they were displaying at the same time.  Her memory is amazing, but then again I guess she is only four (almost five!) and does not have nearly as much crud sitting in there as I do!  We played around, climbed on the statues, talked about which animal we would be if we had a choice, met a police officer passing by, and watched the geese and ducks in the river.  Finally, it was time to head back and I just kept praying that my right leg would hold up and that M&M would not pitch a fit half way back screaming that they were hungry or wanted to walk or needed water.  

To my surprise, we all made it.  We were about two blocks away when a clap of lightning stuck and little rain droplets starting falling on our heads.  

“Hurry Mom, we have to get home!  The rain is coming! Go faster!” 

We made it to the porch without getting soaked.  I got a round of “high-fives” when I get M&M out of the stroller and we headed into the house ready for lunch and a long, rainy-day nap.

I love you to my heart

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There are these transitory moments in my life when I feel an overwhelming surge of hope and love and joy and gratification.  They are beautiful, marvelous, even staggering moments that propel me forward and recharge my batteries when they start to drain from all the routine events of living. 

Sweet Mario

The other morning Jon was getting the kids out the door to head to daycare.  Mario typically wants me to walk him out and put him in his car seat but that morning I was not dressed to head outside and I was saying my goodbyes to Mario in the living room.  I reinforced how much fun daycare was, how Ms. Leslie and Ms. Amanda would take care of him, and how mom would take him on a bike ride when he got home. 

“Have a great day, ok buddy?” 

“Ok, mommy. I want to tell you something, mommy.”

“What is it Mario bo Bario?”

 “I love you to my heart, mommy.”

There it was – my few seconds of absolute bliss standing in front of my two-year old son hearing words of pure love directed at me.  Ahh, they hung in the air.  I snatched them up and gulped them down.  He proceeded to tell me “I am getting to be a big boy, mom.”  My heart ached with affection.  I scooped him up and gave him a bear of a hug, feeling his big boy breath against my ear, and appreciating his tender sweet baby self. 

My sleepy baby boy

      

Kindergarten Round-Up and the Certainty of Uncertainty

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Kindergarten Round Up for Maria

My baby girl,pumpkin seed, doll baby, mama chicka enthusiastically walked through the kindergarten doors last week for Kindergarten Round-Up day.  I ate up her excitement because I had been worried that she would be nervous or frightened about heading somewhere “new.”  However, she has been talking about getting “older” for two years now and dreaming about wearing make-up, having girlfriends to talk about boyfriends, going out to the movies and to dinner, talking on the telephone – you name it.  Not as though these events will occur at kindergarten (or grade school for that matter) but it gets her one step closer to it all. 

As she let go of my hand and headed into the monstrous, overpowering kindergarten classroom, I wondered what she would get out of the year to come. What habits would be formed?  Who would her role models be?  Would she make good friends with some great girls?  When would she have her first slumber party?  Would she have an interest in science or math?  Would she continue to be close with me? 

I was awakened from my daydreaming by a cheerful lady who asked me to come downstairs with the rest of the parents for a parent orientation by the principal.  The principal was energetic and funny and warm and endearing and quickly made me feel at ease with taking Maria to the school everyday in the Fall.  But because of that, I started thinking about me.  What would I do when Maria was in “school” (not just daycare) everyday and meeting friends and branching out on her own and not “needing” me anymore?  What would I do when I went in and jumped on her bed to kiss her one morning and she yelled “Mom, stop!”  What would I do when she did not beg to go everywhere with me, when she was content with eating dinner on her own or going to the park without me by her side?

I attended a lecture by James Hollis last night.  His lecture grabbed me several times.  But at one point he spoke about the need to be comfortable with ambiguity.  The more you crave certainty, the more you will lead yourself down a path of disappointment, doubt, and frustration.  Fifteen years ago, I would have never imagined I would have married my husband – I swore the first time I met him that he was not the right one.  Two years later, I looked at his big “claw” hands that had turned me off when we first met, and I could not imagine being with a man who did not have those strong, powerful hands to hold me, lift our children, mow our yard.  Six years ago, I was certain that I would not get pregnant.  Fertility did not work, my periods were wacky and non-existent at times, we already had a dog that needed attention.  But then, there she was.  Ms. Maria Grace tumbling around in my belly, poking her feet at my side, making me nauseous at the thought or toothpaste or Tums.  And Mr. Mario, two years later, making me crave sushi (and not being able to eat it) and creating waves across my belly for his older sis to feel.   Thank god there is not certainty in this world. 

As for Maria, I told her the other day that I am not sure what class will be like, I am not sure how many people will be in her class, I am not sure about what they do for recess.  Her response was “that’s ok, mom, I will find out when I go there.”  There ya have it – another lesson from my almost 5-year-old!

Sleeping Beauties

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We can spend forty-five minutes trying to get them to bed, absolutely exhausted and irritated at their hyperactivity and zeal at 9 pm at night (and with little to no naps!).  There comes that tipping point, like in the movie Terms of Endearment, when Debra Winger’s sons are walking out to the car with her and her interested man.  The sons try to ask her a question and she politely asks them to go to the car and wait for her.  They do not listen and ask again, and with a little more irritation in her voice she responds “go wait at the car hunny.”  They ask yet again and she finally bursts out “GO WAIT AT THE CAR HUNNY!”   

I remember laughing so hard at that scene when I was a teenager not having any clue that such a scene would be my life in my thirties with two kids.   Actually, I guess that scene does not occur very often… I think back to Debra Winger’s acting and wonder if it was that hard for her to act that scene out or whether she just imagined her own kids doing that and nature took over. 

I pulled a Debra Winger the other night with M&M when I was trying to get them to go down to sleep.  Maria had chosen a book to read, which we did as Mario ran around the room pointing guns at us and threatening us with his plastic sword.  Then it was Mario’s turn. 

“Get a book Mario, and then it is bedtime.”

He  continued to play Ninja.  

“Ok, bedtime, then.”

“No, Mommy.  Book.”

“Get your book, then, Mario.”

He continued to run around chasing Maria with his sword.

“Get your book, Mario,” I pronounced a little more emphatically.

He stayed the course of chasing Maria with his sword.

“Mario, GET YOUR BOOK OR ELSE BEDTIME NOW!”

He placed the sword down on the chair and got Clifford.   Maybe I just need to start at that tone right away?

After reading and rocking, I finally got to head downstairs for some peace.  I wrote, ate some ice cream, and trekked back upstairs to call it a night.  And what did I find? 

Mario sleeping with his two obligatory binkies

 

Those boisterous, high-energy children sleeping like little fairies in their beds.  Maria had even changed into one of my old silk nighties (that I got for my wedding!), which made me just want to eat her up.  It is funny how your mind lets all the irritations and anger slip away in one quick second after seeing little babes resting like this.  I guess it is nature’s way of protecting the young.  Make sure they look sweet and angelic shortly after their tirades so mom and dad stick around another day. 

Smart move.

My little fairy

Easter Madness

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M & M hit the Easter Egg Hunt

 

We started our Easter weekend with a trip to Grandview’s Wyman Woods for the annual Easter Egg Hunt on Saturday at 10:00 am.  We had some friends ready to “take us on” in the hunt so we had to prep ourselves up beforehand with stretches and lunges and body jabs.  We will do anything for chocolate, after all.  Especially chocolate easter bunnies with their cute little faces that you can bite off.  There had to be two hundred kids there, some dressed up in bunny ears or tails, some still in their pjs, some in their “Sunday best” to have their picture taken with the freak mammoth bunny in the corner of the park all dressed up in pink and white and bouncing around waving at the kids (and surely cussing every other second about how hot the damn outfit was or how obnoxious the kids are).  

The kids were very patient waiting behind the line while staring at all of the Oreo packages, Reese Peanut Butter Egg packages, and brightly colored eggs with loads of candy inside of them. Finally, the whistle blew and they were off.  Well, the four-year olds were off.  The hunt was for 2 to 4 year olds.  The 2 year olds seemed loss in a daze or a stupor.  “Why are all of these kids running around like maniacs picking litter off the ground?”  But, that was taken care of in a few seconds as all of the parents of these 2 year olds (including moi) started yelling at them: “Over here. Get this one. Hurry!”  

Mario digging in

 

You would have thought that a check for college tuition was in the egg rather than a hershey kiss.  Mario 

Ri enjoying that chocolate

 

managed to get a few eggs, which he proceeded to open and devour every piece of chocolate he found in them.  Bill, one of our friends, gently approached Mario and asked him for a piece of chocolate.  

“NO!” Mario yelled at him.  “This is my candy.”  

Maria, on the other hand, took two whole packages of Oreo cookies and gave one to Bill and another to Heather who had mentioned that she loved those cookies.  What a sweetheart – hopefully, Mario will learn from her!  

Both M & M made the wise choice of not seeing the Easter Bunny.  We went home and showed off our candy to dad who just shook his head knowing that belly aches were surely to come (and not just to the kids!).  Later that night, we visited Grandma and Grandpa Ionno and Jon’s brother and sister-in-law and their two boys.  Maria has a complete crush on both the boys and hung on them all night (they, in turn, played with her as much as they did not want to at times – god love ’em).  Mario enjoyed playing with the older boy’s nerf gun and pretending he was being shot (lovely boys).  Grandma Ionno made her killer cookies, as always.  Why is it so hard to just eat a couple?  I devoured a dozen through the evening alongside Maria who has inherited my love for eating.    

Off to the Hunt

 

On Sunday, we woke up to another egg hunt but this one at our very own house.  I set out the eggs while Jon held the hunters at bay upstairs.  M&M ran out in their pjs just as I remember doing as a little girl and as I remember Sarah doing as a young girl.  The enthusiasm and excitement I felt as a little girl on Easter morning came back watching Maria and Mario hunt around for their eggs.  I loved seeing their face beam as they found an egg.  Oh, the memories!  

Maria finding "My Little Pony!"

 

Mario showing it off

 

We then took off for Cincy at 9:30 am.  We first went to my cousin Kerry’s house.  She lives in northern Cincy with her husband and two kids.  They are fairly close in age to M&M with Anneliese being 6 and Ben being 2.  Maria idolizes Anneliese, and loves to go to her house because she has a kickin’ toy room.  Mario enjoys Ben’s ball collection, and he loved the sticks and trees in the backyard.  My uncle made the most incredible coffee cake for brunch and pecan chocolate pie.  He has the Menkedick sweet tooth just like me.  We envied their house because it has so much open space and light and an awesome family room in the basement.  Oh, what I would give for a family room!  Dad and Meg brought Duke along (their new dog), which caused much glee in M&M who have been waiting to meet him for a whole week (“it felt like a year, mom!”).  

Maria and Anneliese enjoying the swing

 

After eating way too much food (including insanely gorgeous red velvet cupcakes with cream cheese icing ala Meg-pie), we hopped in the truck to head to Grandma Heile’s house (now owned by my cousin Laura since Grandma died last Summer).  Maria was all excited because she had on a gorgeous Easter dress that she knew all of her girl cousins were adore (she loves dressing up for them because they ogle over her all day!).  Mario was excited because Robert and Cy, our high school boy cousins, would be there and he could stand in awe of them playing basketball and toss the ball with them.   Maria got the attention she expected and she even scored some potato salad from Aunt Jane (her absolute favorite food after pasta and meatballs!).  Mario got to throw the volleyball to us after each play (although he would only throw it to Robert most times).  

We had yet another Easter Egg hunt in the big side yard and 

The chosen few for the egg hunt

 

Baby Grace (my cousin Liz’s sweet baby daughter) got the $5 egg (it is tradition to put out one egg with $5 in it).  When Maria found out, she plopped down on the grass and pouted “I wanted that egg.”  I explained to her that it is fun to see Baby Grace get it; besides, she needs diapers and that will help buy them.  Somehow, that explanation resonated with her and she agreed it was best for Baby Grace to get the $5.  Anyway, it meant more candy for her!   

Maria nabbing the eggs

 

Speaking of candy, that is simply all Mario cared about and frantically opened his eggs yelling “Candy Party” each time more candy fell out.  I am surprised that he was not constipated for five days from all the chocolate he devoured.  

We left Laura’s house at 8:30 pm and headed back to Columbus.  The kids were nearly comatose in the backseat staring at the tv. I was picking through the Easter baskets unwrapping random candies and plopping them in my mouth until my belly did start to ache.  Jon drove us all home safely.  It was a busy, magical weekend. 

Mario basking in the chocolate

My blossoming feminist

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Maria relaxing at the doctor's office waiting for her female doctor

We read a book tonight called “Baby Wanna Be”, which is geared towards little babies but Mario still enjoys reading it.  Actually, I think he just knows that I will read it even after I have said “no more books” because it is a short read and easy to understand (hence, not a trillion questions coming at me with every page).  We flipped past the Babby Wanna Be Firefighter and Policeman pages and moved onto Babby Wanna Be Doctor and Nurse pages.  The doctor was a boy baby and the nurse was a girl baby.  I asked what Maria and Mario wanted to be when they got older.  Mario ignored me (he was too busy twirling around like a spinning top and shouting craziness) but Maria answered.  “Why is the doctor a boy and the nurse a girl?  I want to act like the nurse is a doctor and I want to be her.” 

Having fun at school

There it is!  All my years of instilling that feminist spirit in her has paid off in droves.  I have talked with her for years about the Gloria Steinem autograph I got for her when she was a young girl, and what Gloria Steinem did for women’s rights.  I have made sure to point out that women can do anything men can do (and usually better) especially when a picture shows only men (typically seen in books about astronauts, cowboys, sports figures).  I have reinforced that she is brilliant and caring and feisty and strong.  Now, this must be balanced with the comment she made last night while at Panera.  She saw a newspaper advertisement for a strip club of a woman with huge breasts cupping her hands over them and wearing little rhinestone underwear (yes, I now have to monitor the newspaper basket at Panera).  She held it up giggling and commented “This girl’s boobs are really big, and I love her underwear!”  She appreciates working hard and being smart but also having fun, I guess….??!  Of course, Mario’s response was to yell throughout Panera “Ria, show me those boobs again!”  Thank goodness it was packed with twenty-something college kids who were rolling in their seats over these antics.  

So, there you have it.  A proud moment for a mama whose own mama and stepmom and mom-in-law and little sister have ingrained in her the importance of independence and strength and determination and self-empowerment.  It is flowing right along to the next generation, thank goodness.

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Sweet Mario

Top Ten Things I love about my Mario…

10. Your persistence.  When you want something, you will engage in any antics to get it.  Unfortunately, your father and I and even your sister continue to give in to you every time you engage in these antics, be it crying hysterically; yelling madly; throwing your body down onto the floor in mad rage; or begging mercilessly.  I have told you “No more books” at night and then left the room reading five more.  You are good.

9.  Your compact little body. You hop around like a frog; climb up beds and chairs like a spider monkey; dart in and out of rooms like a harried mouse; and twists and turn like a wild snake.  You amaze me with your flexibility; neither your dad, Maria nor I can call flexibility our strong suit.  

8. The way your strong, sinewy legs wrap around my left hip when I reach down with one arm to pick you up just like a baby monkey with his mama.  You remind me of one of those tiny furry animals with a magnetic clip that you pinch and its arms and legs open up and attached to your shirt.  I always wanted one of those….

7. The way you say “thank you mommy” whenever I retrieve your binky for you, get you a glass of milk at bedtime, grab a toy that you cannot find.  You state it with such genuineness and kindness, which makes it even more ingratiating.  

6. Your unadulterated and pure excitement in being naked!  Whether it is running around Maria’s room after a bath, banging your fists in the air and yelling “Arggghhh” and “Naked” with a wicked smile on your face or taking your pants off upstairs while guests are over and slowly coming down the stairs to surprise us with your antic.

Fiesty Mario

5. Your response to me everyday I picked you up from daycare up until two weeks ago.  It was one of two: (a) “I cried mommy” to which I would respond by asking “how much, Mario?” and you replied “just a little” while you held up your thumb and forefinger close together or (b) “No cry, mommy!” with a look of pride.  Two weeks ago, you stopped crying at drop-off.  It is such an amazing and heart-calming change.  Now, as long as I give you lots of kisses, sit with you for a few minutes while you get your breakfast, and make a big ordeal about leaving “Bye, Mario, I will see you in a while, I love you so much, bye Mario and Mario’s friends, love you Mario, bye teachers, see you later….”  then you are fine.

4. How you love animals and nature.  You will stare at the trees until you spot a bird nest around town; you search for the kitty in the crafts and flower store every time we pass; you plead to pet every dog that passes us on the street; you consistently question Peepaw and MamaMeg about the blue birds and horses at their farm; you smell the flowers in the neighbor’s yard when we take our walks responding “Mommy, they smell so good”; and you pat and hug on Cy all the time calling him down the steps in the morning and directing him to sit so that you can give him a treat.

3. Your love for Stauf’s coffee shoppe. Not even being sick with a fever and aches can keep you from wanting to walk

Mario at Stauf's with his bran muffin

 up to Stauf’s for a muffin or bagel with cream cheese.  You people watch and talk to anyone nearby and smile in sweet content at me as you bite into that big heaping muffin or lick all of the cream cheese out of the container.

2. Your affinity for the outdoors. You want to be outside for as long as possible, often throwing a mad fit if we require you to come indoors.  You pick up sticks, dig in the dirt, play basketball, look for Cy’s poop (an activity that both you and your sister enjoy for some strange reason!), find big rocks, ride your bike.  You have a career in the Sierra Club, kid.

1. Your energy! You made it longer than Maria on New Year’s Eve, still dancing around when the ball dropped!  Sometimes I check your back to make sure there is no wind-up mechanism keeping you going.  You don’t sit still for more than a few minutes even when a good show is on the television.  You have to adjust in your seat, stand up and walk around, run in the kitchen to scare me.  Sorry, buddy, you undoubtedly have my ADD, and there is no doubt you are my son. 

I do have to add one more thing and that is your morning greetings.  When dad brings you into me while I lay in bad, you greet me with such enthusiasm and joy singing “Mommy!” and wrapping your arms around my torso.  What a perfect way to start the day.  I love you, little man.

Mario and momma