Homemade pizza with my girl

January 7, 2015January 7, 2015Leave a comment

I picked up my girl last night from her friend’s house at 6 pm. We were both starving. I asked her what she wanted for dinner and she responded “let’s go buy some healthy stuff at the store and cook.”
Pretty sad when your nine year old daughter needs to endorse such an idea.
We walked into Kroger’s as we goggled “healthy chicken recipes”. We were coming up with too healthy of recipes – salads and fruit – and we didn’t want to quite go to that extreme…. Then I saw Naan sitting on the shelf near the donuts.
Ahh, donuts….
But no, we need healthy.
I remembered my girlfriend heating up a homemade pizza with naan bread at work a couple of weeks ago.
“How about homemade pizza?” I asked Ri.
She was all in. And God love her – she agreed to broccoli and peppers and mushrooms on her pizza.
We gathered all of our ingredients and snagged a Luna bar on the way out to tide us over. Maria spread the pizza sauce and pesto on our naan. Then cheese. Then chicken and the veggies. Ri got out her mittens and slid the baking sheet into the oven. Ten minutes later, ta-da!

They tasted heavenly. Ri made a video as we ate about how good the pizza tasted. She wanted to send it to all her family to let them know how to make it (little does she know all her family knows; its her mom that is behind the eight ball a bit…!).

We finished our pizzas and walked upstairs to get in our pjs. I was darn proud of myself for cranking out a healthy, wholesome meal with my girl. Yea, Ri only had to wait nine and half years but it was worth it, baby!

Style vs. Cut

December 24, 2014December 24, 2014Leave a comment

Everyday over the last week I have felt like I have 30 tasks I need to accomplish. If I get one completed, I’m happy. So when I took Mario and Ri to Great Clips on Saturday for a haircut, I was pumped up because I was hitting two birds with one stone. One stop shopping baby.
But then Ri threw a curve ball on me. She brought up the bangs thing again. She’s been begging for short hair and bangs for months. I’ve been putting her off. For two reasons – I love her long hair and I keep forgetting to call a salon to get us in for a cut. The first reason is one that I told myself I have to get over. If Ri wants her hair short, I will have to life with it. Besides, how many times do I have to tell her to brush her hair during the week? She’s fine with it a tangled mess and it drives me nuts. The second reason should have rung like a church bell in my head when Ri begged me in front of the haircutter to let her get bangs and short hair. I’d told myself over and over before that day that there was no way I should allow Great Clips to give her bangs and a bob. But that “get ‘er done” personality wrestled its way in and knocked away common sense. Holy Sh–.
What a mistake that was.
Ri looked like Thor. Her bangs were chopped to mid-forehead and straight across with no style at all. Her thick head of hair shot out of her head like a big cone had been placed on her temples. I am not a vain person and could care less about looks so when I was aghast, I knew there were problems. It took all of Jon’s might not to cringe when she walked in the door. But Ri, my sweet little Ri, did not see her cut as horrid. She liked it. She had bangs, albeit crazy bangs that were short and flopped up on both sides, but bangs.
I tried to convince myself that Ri’s hair wasn’t that bad. Her bangs would grow eventually. We could tame her cone head. But by the end of the day I could not take it. I called a hair salon in Grandview and begged for an early morning appointment on Sunday. They had one available at 9:30 am. Hallelujah!
The stylist was a lifesaver. She had to cut Ri’s hair into a true bob – up to her ears – but it was an actual “style” versus just a “cut.”

I was so relieved when we left the salon – Ri’s hair looked presentable. I still love her long hair but it’s not about me – she loves her bob.

(She wouldn’t let me take a post-cut picture because she wanted to surprise everyone).
As for me, I learned my lesson and vowed to take a deep breath next time I felt rushed and on the war path to accomplish, accomplish, accomplish … at least when it comes to Ri’s hair.
Baby steps.
>

Watching Ms. Elena

December 18, 2014December 18, 2014Leave a comment

God bless it’s hard to watch a six month old baby! I forgot what those days were like with Ri and Mario – where they need pretty much constant attention and cry like banchees when their mama leaves. I was whooped after an hour and breathed a sigh of relief when I heard the front door open. Ri gave up after about 20 minutes and played video games with Mario. Smart girl. That actually helped me because Elena appreciated the quiet and sat with me for 20 minutes chowing on her sweet potatoes! But holy cow, it took my undivided attention to keep her happy.

Yes, the selfies actually helped. She likes looking at herself in the mirror. My only goal was to not have her crying when Sarah got home. I had to prove I was a worthy babysitter! Mission accomplished. Once Sarah walked in the door though she was a much happier camper.
And Ri was back in full-on mode following Sarah and Elena everywhere. Sar asked if Ri wanted to hold her in the Ergo Baby and Ri jumped at the chance. Did that work out good or what?!
>

She walked around with her for 25 minutes straight; Elena’s eyes fixated on the Christmas lights and objects throughout the house. And, of course, on her awesome older cousin. Now I know the magic bullet when we babysit her next time….
>

Trudging through with love

December 9, 2014December 9, 2014Leave a comment

I finally walk among the living today. It has been three weeks of coughing, fevers, headaches, stomachaches, nausea, fatigue, and grouchiness and I am so ready for my world to revert back to healthy bodies and laughter and positive spirits!
First, Mario got sick before Thanksgiving. If I don’t get the sickness he carries, I still get run down because I end up staying up with him half the night. Even if he’s not calling out for me, I lay awake because I can’t stand to hear him coughing. It was that hoarse, gagging cough he had and it sent chills up my spine to hear him. I’d go into his room and make him blow his nose and give him water and then rub his back to settle him down. I’d reach a time when he wasn’t hacking and think “yes, he’s asleep and well.” Then I’d climb back into bed and within 30 seconds he’d start hacking again. I’d toss and turn as Jon snored away beside me. How can he sleep so soundly?! I’d sit in bed both worried about Mario and pissed at Jon for being able to sleep (to give Jon credit, as soon as I nudged him and told him to get Mario water, he would). The mother gene kicks in full throttle when our babies are sick. I can’t rest peacefully unless they are. And when I don’t get 7 hours of sleep, I go downhill. And so I did. The day after Thanksgiving, I began to feel crappy. And just when I began to feel a bit better, Rocco got sick. He had the same hoarse cough as Mario but with one difference. He had gotten into the bag of turkey bones. So, at 2 am when he was wrenching in his crate, and Jon was snoring away, I awoke. Those mama genes in high alert even for my non-human baby. Poor pup had thrown up everywhere and continuously gagged. I found no turkey bones in his puke (what a life) so became increasingly concerned that one was stuck in his throat. Jon came down and we agreed I should take him to the ER (I’m better at hospitals is Jon’s reasoning for not going). So at 3:15 am, me and my pup drove to OSU Vet Hospital. At least it wasn’t too busy. Lots of dollars later, they diagnosed him with kennel cough and pneumonia and told me I could keep him at the hospital for a boat load of money or take him home and watch over him all day. By this time (7:30 am), I was exhausted, sick, and distressed. I decided if stay home to rest and watch over Rocco. But Monday was the day that all hell broke out at work and I was on phone calls all morning and afternoon. As I left to go to Ri’s geography bee, Rocco threw up blood. Are you kidding?!
So, I ran to her bee, watched her kill it, and then ran home to take Rocco back to OSU. Another chunk of cash later, they confirmed no turkey bone. Still just the kennel cough and pneumonia. The blood must have been from all the coughing. I got a handful of different meds and headed home at 8:30 pm. Jon could see how tired I was and told me to go to bed with the kids. He stayed downstairs with Rocco. I fell asleep before the kids and slept until 4:30 am when Rocco came upstairs to heave beside my pillow. At least I got 7 hours of sleep. It’s all I needed to feel somewhat revived and at least be able to make it through most of the day before wanting to crash.
But then Ri got sick. She was at a concert at Mershon Auditorium when I got the text from a mom friend. She reported she was hot and pale and miserable. Ugh.
Jon was in a meeting so didn’t answer my call. I had a meeting at 1 that I couldn’t miss and it was 11:30. I called the doctor and got her in at 12:15. Tried Jon again.
Voicemail.
I scooped up my coat and keys and drove to Mershon. My girlfriend brought her outside and she laid in the back moaning about her head.
Jon called.
He would meet me at the doctor so I could get back for my 1 pm meeting. This constant juggling and meeting and exchanging and dropping off is the sign of a true partnership and of true love. Jon and I may not see rainbows and stars every time we look into each others’ eyes but we do see deep devotion and love. We see perseverance and dedication and mutual struggle and joy. I watched him and Ri talking as I left the doctor’s office and felt such affection for him. I also wanted to pass out from exhaustion.
Ri was sick all weekend and therefore, Jon and I and the kids just chilled around the house all day Saturday and Sunday playing board games and watching football. It was wonderful and much needed for the body and mind.
Here’s to this upcoming holiday season being free of bacteria and viruses and full of the warmth and love that, thankfully, so beautifully fills our home and keeps us among the living – even when we are completely exhausted.

My caretaker

December 8, 2014December 8, 2014Leave a comment

I took Rocco for a run yesterday morning. Our regular Sunday trot together. The kids will allow me to do that on Sundays but no additional running or working out because it is our day to chill together. I got a call as I approached home. Ri chirped “when will you be home mom?”
I told her I was five minutes away and she hung up the phone on me. I came home to the spread pictured above.
“Mom, I know how you like to eat healthy so I made you eggs and your toast you love with just a little jelly and pineapple and yogurt. And guess what I put in your coffee?!”
Yep, she added my milk and cinnamon and sugar just the way I like it.” She is proving to be quite the caretaker, and gives me hope for when I’m 95 and finally in need of assistance.
In furtherance of her care taking duties, she also got on me this morning because she came downstairs and found an empty ice cream container that had not been opened when she went to bed last night.
“Mom! This is wrong! You ate the entire container of ice cream?!”
What could I say? I fessed up to her and admitted I did it.
“That is ridiculous,” she responded throwing the container away.
Who takes care of who in this family?! (I did make her dinner last night, though – so BAM!).
>

Calling it out

December 7, 2014December 7, 2014Leave a comment

My poor girl has been sick all weekend but she mustered up enough energy to help me buy gifts for colleagues on-line. During the process of trying to find personalized picture frames and ornaments, it struck home how she is so perceptive and aware at age 9.
The first moment was when we were looking at ornaments and flashing letters splashed across the screen informing us that we had 11 MORE HOURS to get free shipping on all our gifts.
“Mom! Hurry up and find your gifts! You don’t want to lose out on free shipping! It costs a lot to ship!
That’s my frugal girl.

The next moment was while we were looking at personalized frames for a friend and her wife who were recently married. All of the frames were titled with your typical middle class white names – “Jim and Nancy” and “Steve and Susie.” I was secretly smirking at the name choices and the pictures of the couples leaning against a tree laughing or embracing in front of an impeccable brick home. As I continued to look for a present-worthy frame, Ri remarked in a mocking tone “look at Jim and Nancy so quaint and happy.” Then she followed it right up with “all the couples here are a man and a woman; there aren’t any gay couples.”
Indeed, Ri, isn’t it a shame.
“But,” she concluded sarcastically, “they did include one African American couple in the mix….. Just sad.” She shook her head in disbelief.
I chuckled at her sarcasm and keen perception. But then I remembered that it wasn’t my girlfriend I was talking with, it was my nine year old daughter. I stared at her – as she continued to search for frames – in amazement and with pride over her ability to grasp how tilted this world can be in addition to her boldness in raising the issue.
After a half of an hour, we eventually found a wooden frame we likes. And we promptly replaced the names “Jim and Jennifer” with “Eunice and Marsha.”

Face Reality

October 31, 2014October 31, 2014Leave a comment

I came home ready to play around with the kiddos. They had friends over and I was gonna challenge them all to a game of Monopoly. I walked in the door and yelled hello. They came booking up the stairs from the basement to greet me. Mario and Rowan told me about their Beyblade challenges and Ri and Henley told me about the show they were watching. Rocco jumped all over me.
Then my phone rang.
Work needed me. “Can you send documents ASAP?”
I scurried around my email trying to find the documents. My computer was acting up, of course. I was getting irritated and pounding on the computer keys as if that would make the documents readily appear. The phone rang again. “Are you sending them?”
Arghhh. Twenty minutes later, I found them and angrily sent them off.
Meanwhile, the kids were sliding down the steps on their beanbags and spilling food everywhere. They were having a blast. I didn’t feel too bad that I had been pulled away for work since they were actually happy about it (another 20 minutes together!). But I did feel irritated and overwhelmed
In general. Then I stewed about the request for an hour afterward.
Jon told me to get over it – nice and simple. And he was right. And he’s a good example of how to get over it. He doesn’t stew. He let’s it go, turns on the game, and chills. I want to get there.
I don’t know how many times I’ve had to answer emails or a phone call after 5 pm. I can safely say a lot. So why am I getting so upset when I know it’s par for the course at times? I think it had to do with the house being a mess, my my expectations of coming home and having the kids swarm around me and all of us sing kumbya together, and the dog going nuts. In other words, living in a different reality. I should be grounded in the fact by now that the dog is gonna go nuts when I walk in the door, the house is gonna be a mess, and the kids are not gonna twirl me around in a circle singing “you are the best mom ever!”
As this article adeptly points out “Face Reality!” If I know that work may ring and interrupt my evening, then I can change my thinking from “dammit, the stupid phone!” to “I will take this call for 10 minutes and then be with the kids .”
At the same time, though, I need to keep some perspective and set limits to when I will and won’t answer work calls. If they call before 6:30 or after 9, I will respond. Anytime in between is dinner and kid time. An exception may be needed here and there but I think that is not unreasonable for the normal course.
I continue to appreciate it is all a learning process and will continue to be. A few years ago, I would have bawled my eyes out with a call like that coming through.
“That’s 20 minutes I didn’t get with my babies and they need me.”
Now, they don’t need me so much. They need their friends…and the computer…and Austin and Ally. It’s not quite as traumatic when the work phone rings and I need to get on it for a few minutes. And it’s also not as hard to let it go to voicemail at times – like when it’s 8 pm and I’ve just finished the dishes and feeding the kids and getting homework done and reading a story to them. I am getting better at turning that phone off when I need to – and doing something I want – even if it’s getting the mail, looking at the latest Title IX catalog and standing at the kitchen counter eating a handful of Cheez-Its.
.

Blessed

October 27, 2014October 27, 2014Leave a comment

There are days I feel so incredibly blessed to have my children in my life. And days, well, I really can’t fathom why I have been cursed with my hellions.
Yesterday was a day of blessing.
Jon and Mario headed out early for the Bengals game in Cincy. They went with one of Mario’s football team mates and his dad. Jon was excited to take him to his first pro game, and Mario was excited to hang with his dad all day.

We saw the boys off and then we headed around the streets of Grandview – Ri on her bike and me on my feet – to try to find a friend’s blue parrot who had escaped during the night out an open bedroom window.
We yelled “NoDo” throughout the neighborhood streets and squinted up at the old regal oaks trying to spot the bird among the colorful leaves. The baby blue of the sky contrasting with the deep brown branches and primary colored leaves left me in awe. I stopped Ri on her bike and pointed upwards.
“Isn’t it gorgeous?”
“NoDo!” She yelled for the twentieth time. Give this girl a task involving helping someone, and she is on it.
We thought we heard the parrot on a few occasions. We’d stop in our tracks. Ri would quietly dismount from her bike. We’d walk under the tree where the noises were heard and wait. We saw a blue jay, a chickadee, a bright red robin, but no parrot. We walked past the friend’s house and saw the empty bird cage on the porch – metal door swung open – food lying all around in a valiant effort to entice the lost bird back to its home.
We sighed.
Ri had soccer at 12:45 and Mama Meg and Peepaw were coming to watch so we had to hurry home to get Rocco for our Stauf’s trip. I love Stauf’s trips with my girl. Always laughter and darling comments. I told her to get her bike while I got Rocco and meet me out front. When I walked out the door, she was standing on the step with no bike.
“Whatcha doing?”
“I thought I’d walk with you, mom.”
I pretended to faint.
This girl does not like to walk anywhere. She will get on her scooter or her bike even if we are going around the block (she later told me that she wanted to make my day do she sucked up the walk).
We held hands as we walked up the street. I talked for Rocco half the time because she thinks it’s hilarious. She kept me entertained by adding her two cents.
She wanted to order our food and my coffee. She even brought me out a side of milk to add to my coffee and some cinnamon to sprinkle on too. She is a doll baby girl.
>

Rocco loves her to death, too because she gives him pieces of her bagel. He pushes his wet nose against her thigh and licks her hand constantly until he gets another nibble. Spoiled completely.
>

She wanted to hold Rocco’s leash on the way home. Don’t you know he stayed by her side and never pulled her once? She’s got him wrapped around her cream cheese finger.
Grandma Meg and Peepaw were at the house when we got home and we piled in the car to take Ri to her soccer game. They got to see my girl running the field and me screaming commands and encouragement to Ri and her team the entire game. I’m born to coach.
Afterwards, we went to Jason’s Deli for some lunch and free soft serve. Ri got her meatballa sub, which was yummy. Peepaw got two rounds of chocolate soft serve and that affirmed my close relation to him. We can’t resist our chocolate.
>

We worked on homework after Mama Meg and Peepaw left. That was even enjoyable as we worked on definitions together. Then we took Henley to Giant Eagle to grocery shop and get a gelato. Those two are hilarious together.
>

We ended the evening playing States of America and drinking hot chocolate. The boys sauntered in at 8 pm after having an awesome time at the Bengals game. Mario scored a football player’s glove as he and Jon took a picture after the game. That kid is just plain lucky. He gave Jon a huge hug before bed and told him sweetly “I love you dad!” I tucked Ri in and she gave me a hug I could not escape. She, too, whispered that she loved me. I held on tight around her torso and whispered “I love you too, doll baby” right in her precious ear.
>

Canine love, and baby too

October 8, 2014October 8, 2014Leave a comment

Ok, so this article explains why – 9 months pregnant – I was worried that I’d never love Maria as much as I loved my pup, Cy. And why, even when Ri was born, I sometimes felt a closer connection to Cy than to my newborn. Those first few months, all Ri did was cry and feed and poop. But then there was Cy who stared at me with sweet eyes, licked me, and jumped up and down every time I came near him.
I figured my feelings were all screwed because of hormones but this article confirms that dogs bring on the same positive, loving responses that children do. And I’m sure if the study would have went deeper, it may have found that your pup actually elicits more positive reaction from you when your child is a crying newborn and you are a first time mom…!
Now, I did eventually grow to wholeheartedly love and adore sweet Ri after I settled into the fact of being a mom to a human baby – not a canine one. She eventually looked up at me with adoring eyes and goo’d at me and I was forever gone – she had my heart over any four-legged creature (and yes, Mario, too).
Now, if I look at nine-year-old Ri or seven-year-old Mario and then at Rocco, I can confidently state that I am a thousand times more in love and dedicated to my human babies.
But I still do get a tingle in my soul when I walk in the house and Rocco comes rushing towards me with tail a waggin’ and tongue a lickin’. Especially when those human babes are fighting and screaming and carrying on like animals.

Learning a lesson

September 23, 2014September 23, 20143 Comments

Yes, this little angel racked up $45 worth of charges from iTunes on Sunday afternoon. I received an email yesterday confirming his multiple purchases of dragon gems – gems used to buy more animals in Dragonvale. He had asked me in the previous days if he could purchase them and I had agreed here and there to let buy some for $1.99. He also paid me $1.99 to buy some (and yes, the gems are used up in three seconds). He found out my password for iTunes a while back. Ri spilled the beans. But he has been very good about not buying anything unless he asks me first.
That little angelic voice inside his head must have turned evil on Sunday causing him to go on a gem shopping spree.
I called him after school and told him I knew about the purchases. He whispered sorry. I told him we’d talk more about it when I got home. He said ok and didn’t seen too worried. When I got home, he was playing on the computer. “Hi mom!” He seemed to have forgotten all about our conversation.
I went in and spoke with Jon. He and I walked into the kitchen and asked Mario why he bought the gems without asking me. He looked down and mouthed “sorry.” Jon opened up Mario’s wallet and took all $39 out if it. “No technology all week dude. And you still owe us $6.”
Mario bit at his lower lip. His eyes swelled with tears. He continued to look down or away from us so that we would not see him upset.
I asked Jon to go to the next room. I pleaded for Mario. “Let’s not take all his money. Let’s let him work to get it back at least….” What a wuss, I am. I even second-guessed taking away technology for the week. Thank god I have Jon to impose some much-needed discipline.
We walked back into the kitchen and Jon asked Mario what he thought his punishment should be. Mario didn’t know. Jon eventually sent him up to his room to clean it and told him that he needed to learn a lesson – that’s why he’d be banned from technology for the week and have to earn back some of his money by doing chores. Smart result and one I could not have instituted without Jon. I am so bad at punishing!
Mario went upstairs.
I went up later to check on him. I still felt bad for him even though I knew he knew that what he did was wrong. How did I become such a softie when I became a mom? I would have ripped into other people who took $45 from me!
He was lying in his bed staring at his blinds. I told him we loved him but he had to learn a lesson. He turned his head over my way and burst out crying. “But you took every last penny I had earned in my entire life!”
He turned back to the shades. Confirmation: if we want to teach Mario a lesson and make it stick – take away his money.
I left him alone and he eventually came downstairs. He walked past me as I tried to hug him so I kept doing the dishes.
“Can we play Old Maid” he asked softly.
Of course, I replied. And he and Ri and I played a hand. Then we went upstairs to get ready for bed. He got his wish to have a pillow fight (Ri and Mario both knocked me a good one). I read them Baby Brains (our new favorite book). Ri and I rubbed his back, and he fell to sleep.
He woke this morning as I was heading down the stairs to take a run. He asked to go with me. I reminded him that he could not play on technology (which I knew would be a deal-breaker). He asked if he could go downstairs and play Wii. I grabbed his arms as he jumped on my back for a piggy back ride.
I placed him on the couch and he turned on the Wii as I got my iPod to listen to NPR on my run. No tantrums about not being able to play on the computer. I even came home to a happy guy. He read off the vitamin percentages in Honey Nut Cherrios to me and then told me he loved me as he headed out the door standing close to his dad.
He must understand that discipline is not the end of the world … now, I just need to understand that….

;

"MOM!"

Adventures in the Life of a Working Mama

Tag: Motherhood