Reminder to Self: Take Vacation

April 7, 2012Leave a comment

Mission accomplished.

We took Naples for a ride this week, specifically the Ritz Carlton in Naples. Yeah, Maria and Mario in the Ritz Carlton. Very scary. We figured we’d be kicked out within 24 hours but surprisingly, I think management was ready to bring us back. Maria and Mario definitely added some life to the place with their unabashed commentary and their hilarious antics. Jon and I had our trepidation about the flights, the hotel, the itinerary day after day. But in the end, the trip could not have been more fantastic. The flights were a piece of cake. Maria is an executive in the making pulling her roller bag behind her with no problem at all. Mario is a hiker in the making throwing his roller bag/backpack onto his shoulders and carrying it through the airport. Jon and I could not stop watching them on the plane. They were so excited to look out the window and watch the plane ascend into the sky. And the amazement of being in the clouds! Jon and I found ourselves laughing every other minute at all of the little comments they made as we flew.

The hotel was decadent. We were on the 12th floor and our balcony provided a good view of the beach (the kids loved going out on the balcony but it freaked me out!). They also loved the bathroom because it had a tv in it. They realized that before Jon and I, and they locked themselves in the room one afternoon and watched Tom and Jerry. We didn’t realize it until we needed to go to the bathroom and after knocking and knocking, Maria opened the door and Mario was on the counter top hunched over with eyes glued on the tv. But other than those few episodes, the kids barely watched any tv on the trip.

The breakfast buffet reminded us of heaven. Pecan rolls, waffles with chocolate chips and whipped cream, omelettes, bacon, fruit loops, eggs benedict. Every morning, the kids would sit back in their chairs and say “this is the life.” Jon and I could not disagree.

We lived at the pool and the beach. Overall, the kids liked the pool better because it was not salty, you could see under the water, and it was less rough. Jon and I would have liked to be on the beach more, but they were pretty good about heading down to the ocean after an hour or so in the pool. Maria enjoyed the ocean more than Mario because she could go out farther in it. She also liked riding the waves. Mario would try to karate chop them as they broke; Maria would just move her body with them bobbing up and down. Our first morning, we went out into the ocean and as we stood in the water, a dolphin swam 50 feet in front of us and then another. We stood in awe – what a way to begin the trip. The pool provided much fun, especially for Mario. He dove to the bottom and swam all over. Jon and I could not believe that he was not fast asleep by 7 pm every night the way that he did cannonballs off the side and swam five feet under the water to touch the bottom. Maria enjoyed resting on the noodles, drifting around the pool. We came up with a game where we named an activity and then we all went under water to act it out. We picked apples from an apple tree, had a tea party, played baseball….

We broke up the morning and afternoon with lunch on the beach or in the pool area. Maria loved the beach restaurant because they served chicken strips, french fries, and a cookie! Jon fell in love with the grouper sandwich and I loved the chicken wrap. All for only $90! Yeah, that is right. Luckily, our package had a credit of $100 a day so the lunch was paid for in the end. If not, I would have had a coronary. It was a treat to have everything right at our fingertips – the pool, the towels, the food, the beach, the sand, the shells. In the evenings, we would head out for dinner to avoid paying $1000 for dinner at the hotel. We hit Buca De Beppo one night, and Mario choked on a piece of mozzarella cheese. Scared us half to death. Jon threw him my way after he hit his back a couple of times and Mario continued to choke. I stuck my finger down his throat and got the cheese out but I was a shaky mess afterwards. Maria did that to me when she was about a year old – we were in Krogers and she choked on a grape. Such a scary few seconds. Ugh! We hit Ruby Tuesday another night with all of the 70+ year olds. That was a trip. We had not been in one of those restaurants for quite some time, and remembered why afterwards.

On Tuesday, we traveled to the Everglades. We saw a slew of alligators off one of the roads recommended by the hotel for alligator sightseeing. The kids rolled down there windows to see them, and Maria kept yelling at Jon not to fall into the water. Mario dared Jon to get out of the car. Quite a difference in the reactions of these two! We took an air boat through mangroves hoping to find some alligators but didn’t see any on that trip. We caught an osprey on our return to the dock, though. After the air boat, we went to the Wooten’s, which we were told was a kids’ museum. It was really an alligator farm. In addition, it housed a turkey, bobcat, tiger, river otter, and turtles. It was a bit disturbing. The kids held a baby alligator, and Maria even kissed it. Mario lifted it up over his head and the caretaker grew concerned when the alligator began squirming (as did I!).

On the way to the farm, Maria had asked whether alligators crossed the road after we saw a sign for jaguar crossing. Jon and I laughed and told her that alligators probably don’t cross the roads. As we pulled out of the farm and traveled up 41, a five foot alligator waddled across the road in front of our car. Jon and I looked at each other and pointed him out to Ri. She proceeded to yell “I told you so! In your face!” Our sweet little 6 year old talking like a 14 year old. While she was yelling that at us, Mario was singing “I’m sexy and I know it” out the window. When we hit a more pedestrian area, he kept repeating “Where is a hot woman? Come to daddy!” Jon and I almost fell out of our seats. Where does he get these crazy sayings? I have never heard Jon talk this way and I don’t think he is bottling it up and going down Grandview Ave. shouting it out so I have no clue where it is from. All we can think is that it is innate in his little brain. God help us. We laughed so hard together in the car that day – it was wonderful.

We played putt-putt on Wednesday in the burning heat. We just had to break up the day at the pool because we were starting to get burnt even though we were lathering up on 50 sunscreen. Of course, it probably wasn’t the smartest move to head to outdoor putt-putt to get away but at least we could cover our shoulders with shirts. That is where we were all getting burnt. I remain the putt-putt queen but Jon gave me a run for my money. Maria and Mario both got two hole-in-ones, thank god. They would switched back and forth getting mad about not getting one when one of them got one.

In the evenings, we would head down to the beach for the sunset. It was cloudy all of the nights except one. That night was amazing. Maria and Jon stood in the water watching the bright red sun descending on the horizon, and Mario and I watched from the beach. It is those moments that rejuvenate me like a shock to the heart. Ahh, so this is what matters to me. Now I remember again. My family, laughter, time away. We all walked back up to the hotel room and as I stared at Maria and Mario ahead of us and Jon by my side I felt such joy and contentment. This is why vacations are needed. Re-start those engines.

We packed it all up on Thursday afternoon and hit the trinket shop to buy souvenirs. The flights home were uneventful. The kids fell straight to sleep on the second flight from Atlanta to Columbus. We arrived at 11:30 pm, and poor Maria had to wake up and walk the entire airport with us since Jon had to carry luggage and I had to carry Mario. She cried during most of the walk but she persevered and walked all the way to the car while sobbing “I just want my bed!” She is a trooper.

Mario woke up in our bed on Friday morning and asked whether it was a dream that he was in an airplane the night before. We chuckled and told him that he had fallen asleep and we carried home to the car and put him in his bed. As I unpacked our clothes, I caught myself wondering the same thing – was it all a dream now that we are back in our “routine?” No way – the sunsets, the pool-time, the beach, the dolphins, the car trips, the time together was all too real and too refreshing to ever be a dream.

Marietta or Bust

October 23, 20113 Comments

The fearless foursome on the bridge

Jon and I have not spent a weekend together in our new home. I was in Italy for the first two weekends and Jon was in Colorado for the third and what was supposed to be the fourth. However, he is such a good shot that he got his elk early and decided to head back on Wednesday so that he arrived back at the house on late Friday night. The original plan was that he would arrive home on Saturday late afternoon. Based on that plan, I had agreed to go to Marietta with Jon’s mom and dad, Maria and Mario, and Maria’s and Mario’s cousins, Alana and Giovanni. Patty and I are very similar in nature – we both talk a lot, are boisterous, and enjoy taking too much on! So, when Patty found out that Marietta had a Zombie Night on Saturday night, she figured why not round up the kids, go to the event and spend the night at a hotel. I liked the idea right away.

Of course, Jon got home on Friday night, which put a little damper in the plans since he was hoping to have us home with him for the weekend but I think he quickly got over any melancholy with the thought of having the house to himself for 24 hours. Patty arrived at the house around 11 am on Saturday and after shuffling kids and clothes and stuffed animals around, we were headed East to Marietta, Ohio where Patty grew up along the Ohio River. We arrived to the hotel after two and a half hours of Tom & Jerry and “the word game” where I give the girls a word and they need to write it in a sentence. Alana loved the game so much – she would craft a sentence quickly and then patiently wait for Maria and when they both recited their sentence, she would immediately beg for another word. Maria, on the other hand, played the game four or five times, and then finally said “Mom, you are acting like we are in school!” The girl needs her down time.

The upcoming cast of Jersey Shore II

The girls decided they wanted to sleep with me and the boys would sleep with Patty and Joe. We threw our clothes in the rooms and decided it was time for a swim. I love seeing the kids’ faces light up when you tell them that we can go swimming. Swimming in a hotel pool is like heaven for them and they get so excited and slap-happy whenever they know they are able to go. The only downside with this pool was that it did not have a hot tub for Mario. I was glad of this fact because I do not like him going in them (I know kids should not be in really hot ones – we have had mild ones in the past) and if I was not around, he would want to sit in one for an hour. Luckily, this hotel had a fairly warm pool so Mario was not purple when he came out. Patty and Joe went to Patty’s sister’s house to start the food while I took the kids to the pool. Mild chaos in the pool area but nothing I can’t handle; I don’t know how parents have four kids willingly though. I played around with the kids for a while and then let them play together (I am really trying to get Maria and Mario to play by themselves or with each other and not rely on me). Mario is so funny in the water – he goes like a madman swimming and splashing and jumping – and then he just completely peters out and wants to leave right away. The others just play around, lounge on the side, splash a bit, and could stay there all day.

Dancing with a young zombie

After the pool, we headed over to Patty’s sisters’ house, Aunt Mae (Mario loves Aunt Mae because that is the name of Peter Parker’s aunt). She lives right on the river and her house also ended up being the center stage for the zombie contest. The stage set up right outside of her house so we got to see zombies parading the street all night long. Patty and I were not sure whether the kids had to dress as zombies or whether they could enter the contest in their other costumes since we had never experienced a zombie fest before but it ends up they would have looked very out-of-place as an angel, a groovy 70s girl, a pirate and a transformer (unless they would have put fake blood all over them and tore their clothes up). Everyone dressed up in some zombie fashion. Alana begged to put fake blood on her and ragged clothes. Patty drew red lipstick on all of their faces but we could not find any old clothes that fit. Maria immediately asked to have the lipstick taken off. “It looks really dumb, mom.” When Alana started dragging her foot down the street and tucking her arm into her shirt in order to look more like a zombie, Maria rolled her eyes at me and whispered “we look dumb trying to act like zombies when we don’t have real costumes.” That is a huge difference between Maria and Alana: Alana very much acts like a 6-year-old girl – playful and silly whereas Maria very much acts like a 40-year-old executive woman – serious and direct.

The claw woman

Dinner reminded me of my Grandma Heile’s house. We had pulled beef, cole slaw, baked beans, green beans and cookies. People also brought chips and brownies and cupcakes. This is a very bad scenario for Maria and me. We both like to graze at these “buffet” like events. And graze Maria did. She ate two meatball sandwiches, beef, baked beans, chips, cookies and cupcakes. By 7:30 she was complaining of a hurt tummy and asking to lay down. She was knocked out at 8 pm. I took the remaining crew out to the stage to dance to lots of 80’s music. They were hysterical dancing. Mario acted like he had a microphone in his hand and he sang made-up words to the songs. Alana danced like she was on Dancing with the Stars, and Giovanni went from one side of the stage to the next hopping and bouncing. They loved looking at all of the costumes. There was one girl who had claws for hands with really long fingernails. THey intrigued Mario who kept swearing to me that they were her real hands. I should have known when he had me look at her for the tenth time that he would have nightmares about them that night….

We finally called it a night at 9:30 pm and left for the hotel. Maria never quite got out of her slumber and Mario was pretty tired when we got into bed (Alana was going to sleep with us but decided last-minute she couldn’t bear to be without Grandma). We watched one show and fell asleep for about an hour before Maria woke up with a belly ache and Mario woke up with the claws in his head. It was a restless night. But the morning brought a buffet breakfast downstairs in the hotel and we got our energy back in us for another round of swimming (Maria and I paced ourselves with a half of a waffle, cereal, and hash browns).

The crew with grandma and grandpa

This swimming episode was a little more chaotic because I got under water with them, threw them, and let them play “beauty shop” with my hair (much pulling and water splashing). But, what our trips for if not to hear the laughter of children happy to be able to do whatever they want to the adult in the water?! We swam for nearly an hour and half and then forced ourselves out to get showers and head back to Mae’s. It was a splendid day outside at 64 degrees and the leaves changing colors to vibrant reds and yellows and oranges. The kids and I did another walk over the bridge to the other side of the river and got sticks to pretend we were fishing off the dock (we had taken a walk on Saturday, too, which was so wonderful up until the time that Mario looked at me with that “I just pooped” look on his face and we had to do an emergency throw away of his undies as well as a poop under the bridge). The kids found a platform to climb, also, and they acted out a play about a girl who wants a car and her mom refuses to get her one. Hilarious.

Cheesing it up on their platform

We hit the road back to Columbus around 3 pm – close to four hours after I thought we would take off. But it was well worth it between the zombies, hanging out with family we rarely see, watching the kids enjoy the hotel and the pool, spending time with Patty and maybe best of all, taking in the beauty of Marietta’s changing leaves and old bridges and wide river. I felt ready to move and walk and hike with the gorgeous outdoors. When we got home tonight, Mario begged me to sleep with him. I gave in and rubber his back and Maria’s legs for a while. At one point, I mentioned that I wished we were back in Marietta. Mario shot up and said “Why, mom?” I answered that I liked waking up to no schedule, seeing the river, hanging out with grandma and grandpa and all of the kids. He looked at me quizzically and then responded “But why would you like Marietta – there aren’t any pigs or baby monkies?” He knows those are my favorite animals but to put those two together cracked me and Maria up. A good way to end the weekend.

Mario turns 4!

September 5, 2011Leave a comment

Mario when he was a "little" boy at age 3 (proud of his fish)!

Mario Joseph turned 4 today. Well, technically, he is four at 9:52 pm, the exact time he shot out of me and entered this crazy, wonderful world. When he woke this morning, he did not make a big deal about his birthday. He snuggled up next to me on the edge of the bed as he does nearly every morning I am not up already and out on a run. He even gave me the Mario “rub” this morning. One of my favorite things. He gently rubs his hand over my face and in my hair without saying a word but with all of the care and love he can muster. I feel it everywhere. Maria woke up not long after Mario scooted into bed (she had been snuggled up with me since 5 am) and, of course, she pronounced to us all in her Maria tone “IT’S MARIO’S BIRTHDAY FOLKS!” And the day began.

Some of the Heile clan

Maria played with Mario for a bit in her room while Jon and I recovered from the night before. We had gone down to Cincy for a pool party at Aunt Susie’s and Uncle Ken’s house. We stayed in the pool most of the day and night with the kids jumping to us and all of the cousins goofing around with us and the kids. Maria and Mario are spoiled beyond words down there with all of my “little” cousins (now ages 14 through 27) playing with them incessantly and paying every bit of attention to them. Maria enjoyed jumping into the pool and then planting herself on a pink raft to sunbathe. She also loved paying “mom” to Gracie who let her indulge in the fantasy for a while until Maria accidentally slipped off the edge and dunked her. Mario enjoyed swimming like a fish and planting himself under water while he pumped his water gun full of water only to pop up out of the water to soak an unlucky soul. He would kick his feet the entire time under water to keep him from sinking and when he rose up he would do the same to keep him afloat. As Jon stated, the boy is like a navy seal. He went non-stop all night long and didn’t fall asleep until we were 10 miles outside of Columbus (Maria was out within 10 miles of Cincinnati).

The aunts spoiled him with presents again this year. I purposely did not want to announce his birthday for the pool party because I did not want people to feel they had to get gifts. But I should have known these aunts of mine would have done so any way. He landed some awesome books, a spiderman dry erase board, a spiderman pez candy container, transformers, and a spiderman closet show holder with a mirror. He stared in that mirror for three minutes fixing his spiked pool hair much to everyone’s delight. Maria even scored some presents. She got some sweet books and pez container and Nerds (her favorite – she is her Aunt Sarah’s niece)! She also got time with her favorite boy cousins, Robert and Cy. It is a joy to see the kids so alive and happy with their aunts and uncles and cousins – it reminds me of the fun I had as a kid with that crazy Heile clan.

When Jon and I finally got out of bed (at a still early 7:35), Maria begged for us to give Mario his presents. She is always taking care of him. We agreed to let him open a few (he surprisingly was not begging at all to open them). She wanted him to open the Incredible Hulk I bought for him but agreed to allow Maria to give him. She also wanted to give him the toy gun we bought for him because she knew he would be so excited. She has inherited the joy I get from watching people express happiness through a beautiful card, a song, or a new toy. Mario opened his $1 spiderman book first and tossed it aside. Next present, please. I have got to train him to be more appreciative of his gifts no matter if he likes them or not. The gun came next and he liked that one a little more but still wanted the next one. It is as if he can’t assess if he truly likes a gift until he looks at them all. The hulk was the finale and it was anti-climactic. He looked at it and said “OH, the hulk. I wanted the smaller one.” Maria looked at him and said “You just broke my heart, Mario.” Mario looked at me and I had my “You should apologize” look on my face and he looked back at Maria and said “this is awesome, Ri!” And after the initial thrill of opening the presents, it was awesome because he played with the hulk and his gun all morning.

We hit Tim Horton’s after the present ceremony for Mario’s timbits. Next we headed to the river to pick out rocks to paint later in the day because we knew rain was coming. FInally, we headed to the new house to see Jason painting and run around the basement. We read Berenstein Bear s as we walked place to place in the stroller. The kids favorite is “No More TV” and “No More Junk Food.” We got home right when the rain came so they hopped in the bathtub. We finally got out the bath crayons that we had to stash for the last month as we showed our house. I thought it would be a good sign to the gods if I let them draw on the tub today because our buyer has until Wednesday to agree to purchase or to walk away and I know he is going to purchase which would mean no more showings and no more sparkling clean house every single day.

: Filled with hot dogs

After our bath, we hit Dirty Franks for some hot dogs and viewing of all the crazy rock stars painted on the walls. After stuffing ourselves with dogs, we headed home to paint rocks and listen to music. I actually found some Children’s Tunes to play for them but after the first few songs, they said “Mom, what about putting on “Baby Got Back?” They are doomed! After rocks, we played school with Maria teaching us how to share and giving us papers to take to our parents for volunteering for the school party. I asked Mario if he liked his parents and he shook his head “yes.” Maria asked him what were the names of his parents. He smiled and answered “Mary and Jon, but I like to call them mom and dad.” What a 4-year-old doll.

Summer’s Last Hoorah

September 3, 2011September 3, 2011Leave a comment

I could not believe my eyes when I saw 98 degrees beaming from the Barnes and Noble sign outside of my office. Isn’t it September? I tried to walk very slowly to a meeting out of my office about five blocks away in order to avoid serious sweat pores falling down my face but it did not work. When I arrived, it looked as though someone had stopped me at the door and thrown a bucket of water on my face. My hair was dripping – really, dripping! And people who don’t sweat just look at me like I am a disgusting, inhumane creature. I don’t like people who do not sweat; they are odd and should be feared.

Silly faces at the pool

When I got back to the office at 3, I realized I had no more meetings and I had cranked out some good work during the week. So, I made the executive decision to meet up with the kids at the pool. I biked home, changed out of my soaking wet dress, and threw on the bathing suit that I had not worn in weeks. When I got to the pool, I peaked in to see Maria holding Zach’s hand leading him to the edge of the pool and Mario jumping in while making a karate-like chop in the air. Ahh, my children. I jumped in with them without any begging on their part; I was ready to get cooled down. The water was cool, and it felt heavenly. Mario jumped into me while Maria acted like Zach was her dog and she made him paddle to her. Megan divulged that while they were sitting during rest time, she listened to Maria and Zach. They spent the entire time discussing their wedding and how many dogs they were going to own, and cats, and fish. Then they moved on to kids. They agreed to three kids. Pretty practical. Megan said they should consider living on a farm if they have a lot of animals, and they both thought that was a grand idea. They talk about their wedding and marriage a lot when they are together. They act like a married couple often, too. Maria tries to get Zach to do something and he refuses; she struts away. They both play alone for a while and then eventually forget they were fighting and resume life as usual.

Maria and Zach

Tonight, Zach got angry because he wanted to go to the yogurt shop and not the ice cream store. When his mom and dad did not give in to him, he pouted the entire time and ignored Maria. Maria tried to hug him and he pulled away. She turned away from all of us and huffed away. I explained to her that she needed to ignore Zach because he was in a bad mood, and she turned to me and explained “I am mad at Zach. I have a right to be mad because he is being a jerk.” How could I argue with that one?! Mario, meanwhile, is completely oblivious to it all. He is way too mesmerized with the sword and shield he found at Zach’s house. He hides behind poles and jumps out with his sword in the air and shield by his chest. A natural warrior.

Sweet Gal Cousins

August 1, 2011Leave a comment

Some of the cousins on Easter

I have the greatest cousins. I am the oldest child to the oldest sister of the Heile family so I have eleven years over my eldest cousin. Then it gradually increases in years up to 25 or so. We all have our idiosyncracies and varied beliefs and traditions but despite all of this, most of us are pretty tight knit, especially the gals. Laura, my oldest cousin and Maggie, born five or so years later, have both graced Jon and I with their presence in Columbus at some time over the last few years. Laura lived up here for a couple of years and Maggie lived up here throughout college and now during grad school.

Laura is forthright and imperturbable. She can party like a LA girl but can also sit around the house all afternoon play fighting with Mario or braiding Maria’s hair. She has an answer to any question. I can ask a question about a kind of plant and she will chime in with a quick answer and then ask about how to handle an ice cream brain freeze and she is just as quick with a response. I envy her straight-forwardness and ability to tell it like it is. I have always tread away from correcting people when they are wrong about something, e.g., Person: “George Bush was a democrat.” Me: “Really? Ok.” Conversation continues. I feel like any correction – even if it would benefit the person in the end – would be taken too harshly so I avoid it. A trait I want to work on because I know the value of constructive feedback. On the other hand, if someone told Laura that Bush was a democrat, she would not hesitate to tell that someone that Bush was a republican. On the same note, I know I can go to Laura for a straight answer if I just got my hair done and I am hesitant about whether it looks whacked or not. She will tell me straight up I need to head back to the salon.

Mag and Laura and the kids

Maggie is a good-hearted, all-american college gal. She is a lot like her mama, my Aunt Julie. She has the same mannerisms (e.g., biting her cheek and nails) and traditions (e.g., smacking your butt really hard in jest). She does not take any grief from Maria or Mario – if they give her lip, she addresses it. If they hit, she disciplines. If they ask her to get them something, she tells them to walk over themselves. Give these kids of mine a week with her and they would be whooped into shape. But she also shows them love and tenderness and has taught Maria a very important fact about boys. “Always date someone who is also your friend.” Maria took that one to heart.

Laura and Maggie came by on Saturday after their night out on campus and we went to the pool. Maria got to show off jumping off the high dive and Mario got to show off by doing power rangers’ moves off the low dive. Maria hung with her girl cousins and role models while I made sure Mario kept his paws off the girls at the low dive (he tried to squeeze them). Laura and Maggie had a diving board contest during adult swim with Maria rating their jumps – I think Maggie pulled it out. When we got home, Laura braided Maria’s hair in the cutest style ever. Maria looked like a young teen model – scary. They also spiked Mario’s hair up to the sky, which he loved. We walked to the yogurt shop for some yummy dessert and watched Maria do her runway catwalks for us. She loved the attention and time with them.

I missed them when they left Saturday evening. I love their influence on the kids, especially Maria. And I love the girl power they bring with them when we are together.

Moments

July 12, 2011Leave a comment

Moments from this past weekend:

Mario running and jumping into the pool, arms crossed in a rapper style pose, rising up with those green goggles sucked onto his face and smile as wide as the ocean;

Maria climbing up the ladder to the high dive, walking confidently to the edge, looking down at me and the water, smiling and jumping in with feet planted firmly down to hit the water first (avoiding that belly flop she initially landed)

Maria on the playground swing, hair shooting everywhere and face filled with exhilaration as the chains untwist while she flies high in the sky

Mario scaling the outside of the plastic slide like a mountain climber

Maria showing her cousin around our potential new house like it was ours already, pointing out all of her favorite spots including her attic bedroom.

Mario and Maria dancing around in the fountains at the Scioto Mile

Mario raising his hand to the tour guide at the Santa Maria after she explained how they trapped rats in a wood box, emptied them in the ocean, and then used the wood box again to trap more rats. The tour guide called on him and Mario explained “I have a book at home that Mommy reads called Michael Recycle. We recycle, too.”

The pride in seeing my teachings come alive in Mario as he yells at a driver that beeped at us “We are not killing animals and polluting – we are walking not driving!”

Maria performing her rap with arms cocked up and head moving side-to-side rapper-style “This isn’t the doghouse, this is the kitty litter house” and Jon and I cracking up at personality on that girl. We see Baby Maria Slick coming to record stores soon.

Watching Maria race up the street on her bicycle begging to go all the way to Giant Eagle without me and Mario (“I am almost 7 now mom; I don’t need you anymore = I can do it by myself.”)

Mario taking down his shorts and undies on the side of the porch and peeing in the bushes (“Mom, boys are allowed to go pee outside in the woods.”)

Maria crawling into bed with me at 5 am and cuddling up against me with her cold feet and wrapped around my legs and her sweet breath against my neck

Feeling Mario rub my arm as we lay together at bedtime and waking up to see his little mouth barely open in such a deep glorious sleep.

Anna Quindlen comes to life

June 25, 20111 Comment

Maria jumped off the high dive this afternoon. No floaties on her arms. No cajoling by her friends or lifeguards. Just pure desire and courage. She has always enjoyed the water but never had much of an interest in swimming or jumping. Her idea of swimming is laying your body in the water, head pointed to the sky, eyes closed, and chillin’. Recently, that idea has been flipped on its head. Maria has warped into a water monster. She loves to jump off the edge of the pool and swim to me. About two weeks ago, she tried out the low dive. I had to wait at the edge of the pool in order to help her swim over after she jumped but she did it. This week, while with our sitter, Megan, she went off the low dive and swam all by herself to the edge. It is like we are watching a caterpillar blossom into a butterfly. Then, today, she dove off the high dive! Tomorrow, I am worried she will be driving.

I was so ecstatic about Maria’s diving feat that I called Jon in Baltimore to tell him. He experienced the same awe that I had earlier. A few minutes into the conversation he lightly mentioned that “Maria is just like the daughter in that article you love.” His connection both impressed me (oh, he does listen to me!) and left me speechless. We hung up and I googled Anna Quindlen’s “I\’ll Never Stop Saying Maria. I read this when I was pregnant with Maria Grace. At the time, Jon and I had not decided on a girl’s name . We had Sophia and Grace in mind but neither of them made us too excited. After I read this article, Maria entered into the mix. The article described a love one mother had for her courageous, authentic daughter who dove off the diving board at age 3 and barreled off a cliff into the Caribbean at age 5. I remember telling Jon how much that line itself and the article in general struck me as I was getting ready to have a daughter. Anna Quindlen summed up the conflicting emotions of having a daughter well – trepidation along side hope and joy for the future (both hers and your own).

As I re-read the article, sentences brought tears to my eyes.

“If I were pressed for one word to describe my only daughter, it would be courageous.”

“She’s an authentic human being in a way I was not at 16, less good girl, more real person.”

“She makes me believe in evolution.”

“Being her mother is like playing basketball with a crack player (and she is that); she raises the level of the game of life by just showing up.”

These short quotes do no justice to the endearing article – a mother of a daughter just needs to read it herself. It moves you. It is an amazing sensation to experience your daughter getting older and taking chances, branching out, weighing risks and benefits. Our influence on her is transparent but she is forming her own little will and beliefs and it is both wrenching at times and absolutely exhilarating.

Mario and Gio

June 12, 2011Leave a comment

Maria and her cousin Alana hit the farm together for a few days this week. I was left with Mr. Mario all to myself. I decided mid-week that it was a perfect time for me to have Giovanni, Alana’s little brother, over for a play date. I had never had Mario and Giovanni together for two reasons: (1) Maria and Alana are at an age where I can take them to a movie or a school play and they can play up in Maria’s room for hours and (2) Mario and Gio are at ages (3 and 4) where they don’t quite play together well yet and they are, how to say this nicely, hyper, manic, spastic creatures.

The boys heading to the pool

Giovanni’s mom dropped him off to me at 4 pm. We decided to go to the pool first. I had told Mario that Gio may be a little scared of the pool since he does not swim as much as Mario. The entire trip down to the pool, Mario kept telling Gio not to be scared of the deep end because it is easy to swim in deep water with water wings. Gio responded that he did not have wings like Mario. Mario shrugged his shoulders and sighed “oh, that’s too bad.” Nothing like the empathy that his big sis would have had – she would have demanded that we head to Target to get wings for him. Mario, he is still learning this trait.

The two boys had a great time at the poolbut they barely spoke. Gio held on to the ladder at the side of the pool while Mario jumped into the water like a skydiver out of a plane. After a while, Gio caught sight of how awesome the water wings were, and asked Mario to use them. After a little bit of cajoling, he agreed. Gio loved them. He walked all over the pool confidently. Meanwhile, Mario ate a piece of pizza on his towel. His new thing is to spread out his beach towel so that all sides are completely flat and then lay on it with his hands under his head like a little superstar. During adult swim, the boys jumped in the baby pool together but went there separate ways. Such different behaviors than Maria and Alana when they are together. They typically stick side-by-side unless there is a fight happening (which can be rather often). But the boys were fine heading their separate ways and not engaging until it was time to leave.

Playing at the park

We left the pool and stopped off at the playground. Mario climbed up the ladder and slid down the slide while Gio watched. Mario prodded him to go down the slide but Gio declared “no, way, I am a scaredy cat!” Mario responded that he is “not scared of anything” as he slid down the slide. Mr. Macho he is. Giovanni climbed up the steps and went down the small slide and played on the swings. Mario stuck with the fireman pole and the big slide. When we got home, I had to clean up Cy’s hair in the kitchen so I left them to their own devices. I wondered how they would play. Within about three minutes I heard a loud bang and lots of laughter. Thirty seconds later another bang and laughter and screams. Giovanni held a plastic golf bag and Mario smashed a golf club against it. They thought it was hilarious. Next, they moved onto musical instruments with Giovanni playing the piano (“playing” is a loose term) and Mario rockin’ the guitar. After ten minutes, they moved onto throwing pillows and random little objects around the living room floor and bellowing manly roars. And there you have it. Take me back to the cave men days. This is what two testosterone little Italian boys gets ya. But they were happy and that is all that mattered. If I could manage the destruction, these two enjoyed each others’ company.

The cousins splashing it up on Memorial Day

In the end, Maria and Alana are probably easier to watch over but there is a lot less bickering with the boys. I just have to watch that the boys don’t destroy every breakable object in the house.

As they buckled their car seats, Giovanni asked if they could watch Tom & Jerry. Before I could answer, Mario said “Mom, I will watch Tom & Jerry because Giovanni is our guest and I should let him pick.” I think there was some self-interest in his statement but it was at least a step towards sharing. As I got the movie out, Giovanni looked at Mario and declared “You are my best friend, Mario.” Mario smiled and replied “You are my best friend, Giovanni.”

When Mario woke up the next morning, he begged to have Giovanni over again for a play date. I told him it was a school day. He proceeded to revert to his cave man behavior seen the day before – yelling and stomping around the house. He even declared that he wished I had never been born. I told him that would mean that he would never have been born. “Fine!” was his response. He went on to tell me that he was going to take away all my pretty dresses (fine with me – I don’t wear them!) and he was going to live somewhere else. It was a good prep session for the teenage years. Of course, because Mario has the ability to go from angel to devil in two seconds flat, he walked up to me three minutes after this tirade and held his arms up for me to hold him. “I love you, Mom.”

Ahh, the joy of boys, or rather, kids.

Taking the Plunge

June 1, 2011Leave a comment

Maria and Mario took the plunge today. Maria had taken it on Saturday and Mario was determined to follow.

On Saturday, one of Maria’s friends bragged about going off the low diving board. I could tell that Maria was thinking about it when he walked away. I asked her if she wanted to give it a try, and to my surprise, she said “yes.” She is such an enigma. She does not want to swim much or put too much effort in splashing around with her brother but she decides to plunge off the low dive. She has some daredevil in her. I had to swim over to the edge of the low dive on her first jump because she was nervous of the height. The lifeguard yelled at me about staying at the ladder so the next jump I had to stay a little farther away (although I ended up disobeying the lifeguard and getting pretty close to her again). Today, she braved it and jumped with me hanging on to the ladder at the side of the pool. I had to swim out to help her get her bearings but she did it all by herself!

Mario shook and shivered while he stood one foot from the edge of the low dive board. I had to literally stand under the board to get him to jump. Luckily, the kids and adults were super patient and waited while Mario debated jumping off for three minutes. When he finally decided to jump, he held his arms out and jumped feet first into the water. Perfect! He was charged up when he rose up from the dive shaking his head and smiling hard. His next jump was not as pretty – he did a 90% belly flop. When he rose up, that big smile was a grimace and he turned to me to say “My tummy hurts.”

After the belly flop, we took a break from the diving board and played in the water. We played shark and beauty parlor (Mario dunks me to do my hair and Maria applies my makeup). Mario went to the baby pool while Maria and I ate cheez-its. Mario met a few friends in the pool and began playing splashing games. He dove in the water face first with his darlin’ goggles on and shot up out of the water yelling “Did you see that mom?!”

He was a complete pill to try to get to leave. Last year, he was begging to go after 20 minutes because he was so cold. This year, I have a feeling he has taken a different turn. Granted, it was 90 degrees today and the water was comfortable – not freezing like a lot of days last year so we’ll see once this hot streak ends. On the stroller ride home, Mario stared out into space. I asked what was wrong, and he didn’t respond right away. After a few seconds, he finally replied “Mom, I just wish I could be at the pool right now.” Maria, being the diplomatic one, told him that we would head back this week and have a lot of fun but that we had to head over to Aunt Carrie and Uncle Patrick’s house now. Mario turned to her and said “Ok, Ri” and Maria patted his head. Ahh, I could eat these two babes up at times like those.

Chillin’ at the Creek

May 28, 2011Leave a comment

We woke up last Sunday morning and engaged in an old ritual – donuts from Tim Horton’s. The kids were able to wear only their nighties as we strolled down to the donut shop. They have not been able to do that for eight months. We decided as we chowed down on our timbits that we would head to Battelle Darby Creek in the afternoon. The kids went there with their Peepaw earlier in the week and loved it.

Lookin' good for the creek

As soon as we got home, Maria and I stuffed our backpacks full of random eats, water, and towels. The kids wore their bathing suits under their clothes with the hopes we could get into the creek. With all of the rain, I was worried that it would be too swollen and rushing. With sunglasses and sunscreen on, we hopped in the car and headed west. The creek was only 20 minutes away and as we pulled up, Maria shouted “this is where we parked with Peepaw.” My dad knew she would remember everything when I asked him for directions, where to park, and where to enter.

We hit the Overlook Trail first because it was only about 600 feet total in length. We learned about the glaciers that used to inhabit this part of Ohio and how they created the valley we saw below. Later in the trip, Maria asked “can we see the glaciers?” Our next trail expanded further. While we headed down the wood steps,

Throwing rocks and watching for water snakes!

Maria yelped. She was just ahead of me and Mario was ahead of her. When I glanced down at her, I saw a dark-colored snake slithering over the side of the step to the woods. Mario was so upset he did not spot it. Unfortunately for him, he does not have quite the eagle eyes that Maria has inherited from her dad. I congratulated Maria on her keen eyesight and she smiled at me. But when we got to a little pool of water, she refused to put her feet in for fear that a water snake would “kill her.” Everywhere she stepped, she looked around her to ensure there were no snakes slithering her way. Mario was hilarious trying to calm her down “Maria, mommy will protect you.” “Maria, you don’t have to be scared; just throw a rock at a snake and it will go away.” “Hold my hand Maria, I have you.”

Maria braving the waters and Mario being way too daring!

I started to fret at the thought of having her be too scared to ever want to go in the woods again. One of my favorite activities with the kids and that darn snake would ruin it. But, my girl came through after we left the pool of water. We went back to put on our shoes and clothes and keep down the trail. Maria complained of being hungry and not wanting to see a snake but then we found a small hill that led to a gentle opening to the creek. A family stood in the water. Mario threw off his shoes, and ran down the hill to the water. He picked up a stick and stood calf high in the creek. Maria hesitated, and I held my breath, but then she walked down the hill and stood in the water with Mario. There were two girls and a boy in the water with their mom and dad and the two girls were sitting on rocks in the water and laying on their bellies letting the creek water push them around. That is all Maria needed. She moved closer to them and tried it out, too. Before I knew it, I was warning her to not go too deep. She was cured of her water snake fear. Mario spent the entire time using his stick as a sword and a water splashing tool. Happily, he did not use it to hit anyone in the family next to us.

Self-timed shot after chowing on lunch

After 30 minutes in the creek, we stepped out to eat lunch on the hillside. If I was a poet, I would have had everything I needed to write a famous poem while sitting at lunch with the kids. As we ate our pretzels and cereal bars and cheese and crackers, a Mexican mother and four young kids arrived and jumped into the creek. They exhibited pure, unadulterated joy as they splashed around in the water and the mom laughed while taking pictures and talking in Spanish to them. Joy is universal. A centipede moseyed up the tree in front of us – Maria, of course, pointed him out to us. “Really?” I thought as I laughed about how perfect the day was turning out to be.

We were pretty exhausted when we walked out to the car (after a jaunt on the playground that has a small climbing wall – both kids scaled it like pros). Mario wanted a movie but the movie he had chosen for the ride out to the creek was horrid – massive killing and blood. I guess we didn’t read the rating on the movie box even though it was a PG movie and still contained all of that nastiness. Mario was livid when I took it out on the ride over; Maria felt so bad she told me she would close her eyes and sing so that Mario could watch it. Instead, she got to hear Mario cry and scream for 10 minutes until I said “Look at the cows out the window” and that little mind went from pissed off to amazed at the sight of bovine grazing in the field.

Ahh, picture perfect babes.

I really wanted a McDonald’s diet cooke and small fries and quiet for a half hour so I went all out and stopped at Giant Eagle to see if they had a movie to buy (yes, desperation!). Besides, we needed a new movie to add to our repertoire. Of course, they had nothing less than $24,99 and as much as I was tempted to go for it, my practical, money-conscious self could not do it. On the way out, we saw a Red Box Video. We see people at those boxes in Grandview all the time but we had never made the dive to do it ourselves. We went for it and rented Toy Story 3 for $1.00. By the time we got in the car, buckled up, and turned it on, Mario was passed out. Maria hung in there with me but sat quietly watching the movie while I enjoyed the quiet ride home with my salty french fries.

What a marvelous, awesome afternoon. I have thought about that afternoon almost every day this week, especially when I started to get irritated with a colleague or a work situation. I remember Maria lying on her belly in the water or Mario trying to skip a rock and they at the least made me smile and at times, even helped produce a significant attitude adjustment on my part. Nourishing moments for the soul.

"MOM!"

Adventures in the Life of a Working Mama

Tag: Swimming