Cake Walk 2014

April 5, 2014Leave a comment

Cake Walk 2014 kicked my butt. I don’t know if it was the opening and closing of the festivities or the loud band music and even louder kids, or the chocolate cake we devoured once home.
Maria went with her friend, Kathryn since she had a play date with her after school. This year she continued to step one foot closer to teenage-hood. She came to see Mario and me only a few times and it was only to ask for money and water. She hung out with one group of girls for a minute and then others the next. I likes seeing that.

Then she found our next door neighbor who is Grandview’s baton twirler and stood with her to try to learn how to twirl. She must have stood up there for 30 minutes.
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Meanwhile, I should have left at 8:30 to head up to the event with Mario because he would have never known what time it started. I gotta take advantage of his youth while I am able. And all he wanted to do was play the kids games and all I wanted to do was try to win a cake. Guess who won?
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He played the golf game again and again. Then he moved onto the football game where the volunteer was absent. All the kindergarten boys were loving the freedom of that. Soon a volunteer showed up so we moved to the lollipop game. Such anxiety each time he pulled a sucker out to see if it had a blue tip or not. He moved to the treasure chest and scored these dandies.
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Then we hit the baseball pitch. He was allowed to stand on the line closest to the catcher but refused. He wanted to stand where the older kids had to stand. And don’t you know he got a strike on his first pitch.
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Ri kept trying to win a cake but to no avail. I finally got Mario to head down with me and try to win. After three more hole-in-one attempts, he finally followed.
There was Ri standing in line with Kathryn and Evie. She smiled when she saw me and waved (at least I still get that). Mario and I went to another line and danced to the music as the band played. The music stopped, we sat in our chairs and hoped. Unfortunately, our numbers weren’t called. Mario got livid last year when this happened but this year he brushed it off. We stayed for the band’s last tune and although we didn’t win a cake, we bought a sweet blue one in the form if a mustache that Kathryn and her mom had made. And we dug in at 10 pm when we finally got home.
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Hamsters, pups, oh my…

April 2, 20142 Comments

I could offer Maria and Mario a round trip vacation to the Bahamas, a trip to Disney, or a new bike, and they’d still pick a trip to Petland over all of them. They have loved that store since they were toddlers. They find so much joy when they walk in the door between the dwarf hamsters (Mario’s favorite), the pups (Ri’s favorite), kittens, bunnies, and gerbils. We made a trip up there on Sunday morning because we had to buy party supplies for Sarah’s shower at Party City, which is right next door. Ri has a future in party planning, for sure. She worked on invites at the house and when we got to Party City she immediately moved to the decorations aisle to coordinate themes. We would have spent $500 on decor if she had her way. She couldn’t stop herself: “this is adorable; we need these steamers; these games are a must….” Meanwhile, Mario found himself some killer gold glasses. He wanted gold glitter to spray in his hair but I refused.
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A piece of bubble gum made up for the glitter. We delivered our bundle of party goods to the car and headed into Petland. Ri darted for the pups and Mario rushed to the dwarf hamsters. He yelled for me to come over to him “mom, there are six of them and they are sooo cute!” He could stand there all day and pick them up, put them in their wheel, pick them up again, put them in their wheel again….I was tempted to buy one but realized I was reliving my childhood and my love for hamsters (supposedly I was allergic and therefore had to give away my hamster after days of nurturing it, and yes, there were years of counseling over that). But now that I’m the one that would have to clean the cage, I don’t have as much of a desire for one. I told Mario he already had fish to love. His response: “As soon as my fish die, I want this hamster.”
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Those fish of his need to watch out. Ri found herself a little chow puppy and loved on it. However, when I commented on how cute it was, she promptly replied “not half as cute as our Rocco.” She is loyal to the bone.
She and Mario had a blast with the pups. One little sprite fella wouldn’t stop biting Mario’s shoelaces and jeans. Mario loved it and purposely darted all over the space to play with it. He was belly laughing so hard I thought he’d hyper-ventilate.
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It’s great to know that we can find so much happiness in such a tangible trip. And one day, when fish have traveled to another place, we may have a hamster in the house.>

Legos and Baggie books

March 17, 2014March 17, 2014Leave a comment

I refused to allow the kids on the computer Saturday morning so they roped me into playing Legos with them. Quite an experience.
Mario created flying men who could wield a giant axe mid-air to cut off peoples’ heads. Lovely.
Maria created a trailer to carry horses and several townspeople to Texas. (Non-sarcastic) lovely.
Maria and I were finally able to get Mario to calm his violent men down and hop on the trailer. Then she surprised him and made the trailer fly! Mario was impressed.
He follows her lead more than he will ever admit. For example, she created a “blender” on her trailer for the people to make smoothies. Within two minutes, he was building a similar blender and explaining how people can make smoothies. Ri looked at me and smiled. She knows her influence.
After an hour or so, they begged to play Minecraft for a few minutes. I agreed only if Mario read a Baggie book to us.
Mario whined a bit but then gave in to the pressure and sat next to Ri and read. He is doing so well with sounding out his words. He does really good looking at the pictures to figure out the words, too. Sweet story about that: in one of Mario’s books, there was a picture of a dog running with his owner everywhere. A boy asks “can I take your dog on a walk?” A girl responds “No, take the dog for a run!” She looks angry in the picture even though it’s clear that is not the intent. When Mario read that last sentence, he read it angrily. I asked him why he used that tone. He responded “look how angry that girl looks – that is how she would talk.” Very analytical thinking out of that boy.
He was close to finishing his baggy book when he hit a hard word: “skipping”. He tried a few attempts when Ri stepped in and gave a hint.
“How does “sk” sound?”
Mario couldn’t quite get it.
“What do you do with rocks at the river?”
“Skip!”
“Good job buddy! Now what does “ing” sound like?”
“Oh, skipping!”
God, I love seeing those exchanges! How darling. Makes my heart flip-flip.

Pinch me

March 9, 2014March 9, 2014Leave a comment

Pinch me.

My life is ridiculously good.

Sweet, generous, loving kids.

Hilarious, caring hubby.

Warm, ever-present family.

True friends.

Great colleagues.

I am very lucky. Most days I stop myself ten times over and process this fact. Is it my culture transformation work I did at the university? Is it that I’m getting older and with that gaining a fuller picture of what it means to be happy? Is it that all the self-help books I read in my 30’s have finally hit home?

My weekends with the kids rarely disappoint. They are at ages now where they are able to play on their own or with each other but they also still want to hang with me and go to the park or take a bike ride. It’s perfect: I can get fully caffeinated, brush up on world events by reading my Times, and then later engage in a full-blown pillow fight.
And I love how their minds are developing; it leads to really awesome questions ranging from the benign – how are sidewalk made – to the sublime – why do we go to war. Mario points out things he sees in books we read together that I would never notice. Ri continues to practice the art of compassion by never judging others – the other day I about cussed out a young guy who cut in front of me in line at Kroger’s and she pulled me aside and whispered “mom, he may have somewhere really important to be.”

Yesterday was another day where I stopped myself over and over amazed at how wonderful I had it. The day brought wonderful near-Spring weather. The girls took a bike ride while I walked Rocco. We got a picture on the same rock we took a picture on when Rocco was a pup. Ri was very excited about that!

Mario met us at the park and the kids decided it was time for Rocco to adventure down a slide. Their eyes about popped out of their heads when he did it.

I love this picture of the kids running with Rocco. It’s a perfect depiction of the joy of warm weather.

And this is the perfect depiction of Ri laughing hysterically as she tries to catch up with Rocco!

Love love love these beginning days of Spring.
Next up, a trip to the river where Ri and Mario and I used to go on Sundays to collect rocks. It was closed for a year to create a bike path and I was anxious to see what the trail looked like. We piled in Stephanie’s van with the pup sitting next to Ri and the boys carrying their weapons (in case we encountered zombies) and headed down the street. We parked at the gas station and unloaded. What a sight.

The bank where we used to collect and throw rocks was still ready for us. But it was rather insane trying to make sure the kids didn’t fall (there were huge boulders lined up where there used to be gravel). Rocco added to the insanity by trying to jump in the river; Mario screamed like a maniac for me to hold his leash because “he didn’t want his dog to die!” So, I held him as he pulled me all over the rocks while I held Paxton to ensure he didn’t fall. Good workout.
The kids found great hide-outs made of sticks and leaves (I didn’t inform them that homeless folks probably used these “shelters” because I didn’t quite know how Steph would react but I did feel compelled to talk to M&M later that evening to help them appreciate the struggle all people face at times). The boys played capture and the girls played dorm room (whatever that is).

The kids found a big rock pile on our way out and I asked them to pose as savages. All complied except Mario who continued to laugh like a hyena!

In order to get them to leave, I had to promise them a snack at the gas station. They booked it after that promise. The boys got chocolate donuts (they slipped me one in thanks) and the girls got ice cream cones. They were happy as heck driving home.
We ended the night watching my girlfriend’s kids. A six week old and two year old who I had never met… Huh. I was a bit worried. But it ended up being absolutely joyous. Ri was excited all day to hold the six week old, Emerson Lois. She kept asking “when will it be 5:30?!” Mario kept telling me he didn’t want to babysit. But when they dropped off Miles, Mario took to him like sugar. He threw the ball with him and led him around his room to play. It was precious. And Miles couldn’t be more chill of a kid. He just followed Mario and played with whatever Mario gave him. He never cried once (kudos go all to Mario!).

He taught him how to crawl up the stairs so he wouldn’t fall down and how to beg for (and receive) a cookie. He was so compassionate and sweet with him. Warmed my heart.

And Ri was, as I knew she would be, a doll with Emerson. She laid with her and held her and couldn’t wait to change her diaper. Emerson is a real life baby doll!

Emerson pitched a little fit at one point and I had to put her in her seat while I got Miles’ dinner. The next thing I knew, Ri had her quiet by rocking her back and forth. She also had picked up the mom talent of multi-tasking as she rocked the baby and read a magazine – love it!

I sat at the kitchen table when my girlfriend left with her kids and my kids and Jon had gone to sleep and felt engulfed with gratitude. Another day full of laughter and sunshine and good kids and nature and a tired pup and chocolate donuts. Really, it doesn’t get any better.

Cancun 2014

March 5, 2014March 5, 2014Leave a comment

I never thought I’d complain about the heat after the Winter we have had this year. But I returned from my morning run in Cancun sweating and feeling nauseous because of the sun beaming down on me. I think my body was in shock after running in 5 degree weather the last two months. But that was the only hot weather complaint I had while on our annual Cancun vacation with Jon’s work folks.
We left on Wednesday morning at 4:30 am (I braved 10 degree weather in shorts with the excitement of landing in 80 degree weather). We arrived at the hotel at 11 am, did our Chevy Chase Vacation head bobbing on the balcony of our room while taking in the ocean, and headed down to swim. We had a blast playing in the waves. Meanwhile, Ri called us four times in a row to tell us how much she missed us. Mario was perfectly content with Grandma Ionno but Ri missed having us around her. We better take that in while we can because I have a feeling that may not continue in a couple of years.
We hung out a good deal with Jon’s friend Craig and his wife Julie. Julie and I tease Jon and Craig about their bromance but it is quite darling. They told Julie and me that they take care of one another – when one is having a bad day, the other lifts him up. And when Craig heard Jon ordering a coke at McDonald’s one morning, he counseled him on making better choices. Precious. Julie talked to me about Pure Barre and how much she loved it. I think that will be my new adventure in exercise…. They are a sweet couple and we all laughed a lot when we were together.

Jon and I engaged in our normal routine: I get up and workout, we meet for the killer breakfast buffet (Ri would adore it), we jump in the ocean and swim, we get massages, we jump back in the ocean, we eat dinner, we crash. Not a bad life. I even swam with a shark this year! I didn’t mean to by any means…. I was looking for shells a ways down the beach and stood up to find a three foot shark swimming by me. I froze and let him continue to circle me and when he moved away a third time, I darted onto the beach. I couldn’t wait to tell Jon and Mario! And Jon experienced a first at the beach, too. He got a pedicure! His feet were baby soft and he had to admit he loved it. I imagine he will be sneaking away at lunch to get one every three weeks. He did have to endure his guy friends giving him grief about his robe though. The front desk lady gave him a super short one to wear even after he asked for another. When he walked into the waiting area, his buddy Phil shook his head and said “Jon, you just made my day.” His other friend told him that the robe looked like it would fit his twelve year old daughter. Nothin’ like guy friends to calm your anxiety. When we got up to the room, there was a present laying there for Jon – a toddler-size robe compliments of “The Guys”. We laughed for ten minutes straight.
Jon’s boss, Jim tried to teach us to body surf to no avail. The man is like balsa wood the way he rides a wave nearly into shore. Jon and I made it about five feet from where the wave crested.
We missed hanging with Dave and Jen and Joe and Lydia – our Michigan buddies. Our schedules never lined up except when Jen and I got to dance to our Violent Femmes song in the pool Friday night. We are gonna need some time on Dave’s boat this Summer….

Patty cranked out four straight days with the kiddos, god love her! Maria got strept throat on Thursday. She called us up barely able to speak but mustering up the words to tell us that “this is the time when she most needs her parents near her.” Talk about knowing how to give a guilt trip…! When we arrived home on Saturday night (a day early between Ri’s strept and the snowmageddon predicted for Sunday), these posters were hanging:

I love how this one has our ages.

And this one poses questions to us (answers: I’d rather eat with Michael Jackson and Jon would rather eat a snail).
We got the most warm and welcoming hugs from the munchos when we stepped in the door (we need to leave more often).
And Rocco was in heaven with his doggy pals at the farm. As Jorge commented “Rocco likes Winter.”

All is back to normal again: kids, Rocco, 48 year old dad and 42 year old mom are back at home together waiting for Spring to come.

Spring is coming…

February 23, 2014February 23, 2014Leave a comment

Yesterday ranks at the top of my list for awesome Winter days because it delivered hope that Spring will be coming shortly. We got up to 50 degrees!
I got in a long run in the morning and then came home to the kids playing the card game, War. Mario had all the aces and was whooping on Ri. Thank god Ri is a good sport and can laugh it all off. Every time Mario won, she’d growl at him and he would laugh hysterically. That was more fun than the actual card game.

After War, they built a fort on our bed and played together while I cleaned up the downstairs. Then Mario rode bikes with Quinn while Ri and I took Rocco for a walk. Ri broke out her bike for the walk, too. The first bike rides of the year! Whoo-hoo! Spring is coming.

Rocco followed her like a bodyguard on the walk. It was Girl Scout cookie pick-up day so we headed over to Kimberly’s to pick up Maria’s 207 cookies. she rocked it out this year! The entire car trunk was full of boxes of Samoas, Thin Mints, Do Si Dos, and Trefoils. If we got stranded, we’d be fine for 3 months.
We came home and unloaded them in the garage and then started on our way. Mario decided he wanted to help us, too. So there we were just like a couple of months ago when we went out to sell the cookies – all three of us and Rocco walking door to door and enjoying each other’s company. I just adore these kiddos. We passed out the initial round to six houses and then needed a pb&j break. After chowing on some lunch, we headed out again (sans Mario who decided he needed done dad time). This is how the stroller looked as we headed out on our next delivery.

Ri was a trooper – she made it to every house. I was so proud of her! She would calculate how much people owed before she walked up to the door and always say “thank you.” What a good business woman.
As a treat, I allowed her to take Rocco to the doggie wash. We’ve passed it a hundred times on our walk and wanted to take Rocco but never got around to it. Rocco, we found out, would have rather kept it that way. He was not fond of the water or the shampoo. I had to hold him tight the entire time. Ri wanted go help wash him but Mario declined because it would have meant he got a little wet (he can’t stand for his clothes to get wet).

He had to spend 45 minutes under the dryer. We left so we didn’t have to see the torture. I am sure he was like “seriously, people?!” But look at how darling he looked afterwards!

Love love love the day. I am so grateful for sweet kids, a supportive hubby, a running partner pup, and an incredible family. And for Spring coming….

Future careers

February 19, 2014February 19, 2014Leave a comment

It came to me last night. Maria is going to be a lawyer and Mario is going to be an actor.

I took the kids upstairs last night to get them ready for bed. On the way up, I asked Mario if he gave Grandma and Peepaw a kiss and hug when they left that afternoon. He looked away from me as he muttered the word “yeah” and I could see a little grin. I repeated my question and asked him to tell me the truth. He looked at me and explained that he forgot. As he explained, he tried to jump from the bed to hug me. I stepped back and told him “no playing” until we talked. He fell to the ground and looked up at me with pathetic, watery eyes and cried “I can’t believe you wouldn’t hug me. My own mother wouldn’t hug me!”
Maria swooped in like Superwoman and started at me.
“Mom, how could you be so mean to Mario? All he wanted was to see his mom when he got home and you won’t even hug him?!”
I explained to Ms. Justice that I just wanted Mario to understand that he needs to appreciate all he gets from his family and make sure he says thank you to people. Maria started it up again:
“He did say thank you, mom. He even hugged them earlier in the day. But he couldn’t kiss them because they left too quickly. He would have ran out and grabbed them if he knew they were leaving but he was upstairs cleaning his room for you.”
I knew that was an exaggeration, which Maria has gotten very good at lately. Adding one little, additional fact to seal the deal. Meanwhile, Mario stood to the side of the room looking completely dejected. I walked up to him and said “I love you pumpkin. I just want you to appreciate all you have. Now give me a hug.” As I reached out to wrap my arms around him, he backed away. I could see him start to smile but he held it back.
“I won’t hug you now. You wouldn’t even let me hug you earlier so I won’t hug you now.”
He looked away towards the wall and I am almost sure he was smiling. He does this so I will keep going after him and beg him to let me hug him.
When I walked away, he faked a little, muffled cry. I walked back and wrapped my arms around him. He wiggled around. I continued to hug him and kiss him. He finally gave in and let me hug him without restraint. He eventually looked up at me, brushed the hair out of my face, looked at me with a serious look, and said “love you, mom” just like actors I used to watch on the Guiding Light soap opera.
Maria joined in the hug. As she leaned over me, she explained “we just want to be perfect for you and that’s hard to do all the time so you need to understand that and not get so upset.” Just like a trial advocate who taught me in law school.
Heaven help me.

Woman’s Best Friend

February 17, 2014February 17, 2014Leave a comment

This bundle of love was my running/walking partner all weekend. The kids have been loving life in Disneyworld between buffet meals, 70 degree weather, animated character greetings, and cool rides. Meanwhile, Rocco and I have been working it out in all this snow. We went for a total of 26 miles together over Saturday and Sunday – a marathon!
I realized how much I absorb when I run with the pup versus when I run alone. With the pup, I have no iPod. I am forced to concentrate on the trees, birds, clouds, yards. I think about writing that letter to my sis I’ve been wanting to write. I consider taking those hip-hop classes I always wanted to try. I smile at the fat robin trying to get her grip on the tiny branch bending to hold her. I am grateful for my folks and the lessons they have taught me. I appreciate all that I have been given and respectful of how fleeting it all is….

And then Rocco finds a stick and I get jerked to the right as he stops dead cold in the snow to chew away at it.

I prod him along and he eventually rips off a small piece of the stick to chew as we carry on. He loves to run ahead of me and I don’t mind it because he makes me keep a pace. However, my dog trainer and hubby continue to razz me about making him heel. What I really enjoy is taking him to the woods by our house. It is about a quarter to half mile loop. I can typically let Rocco off his leash because the only other visitors have dogs who run off-leash as well. I have been training Rocco to heel when I first let him off leash or when we are approaching the bridge and I can’t see who may be up ahead. He’s doing better each day with it. But I love when I finally say “OK” to him and he is able to run free. He runs with such force – like a stallion – and he seems overjoyed with his ears flapping.

And then he stops when he no longer sees me and waits for me to catch up. Such a gentleman. Then he lifts up his leg and pees on new territory. Such a gentleman. I love having a pup back in my life.
Ri and Mario have grown attached to him. Mario loves to wrestle with him and try to grab toys from his mouth. The last thing our trainer would recommend but it’s sweet to watch a boy and his dog play so hard (plus, Mario and Rocco get worn out, which is a blessing). Ri just loves to cuddle with him which is fairly hard to do because he is a bit of a loner when he decides to rest. But he has warmed up to Ri and often gives her kisses our of the blue.
I hope this little bundle of fur is able to see the kids off to college. I certainly don’t think we’ll have any trouble keeping him in shape after our runs this weekend.

G for Grumpy

February 12, 2014February 12, 2014Leave a comment

I walked in the door this morning after hitting the gym and found this precious sight. Mario was reading his baggie book out loud while Ri listened. He struggled with the word “grumpy”. He saw the expression on the boy’s face in the book and took a stab at the word.
“He is ‘angry.”
Maria gently corrected him.
“Good try little buddy. It’s not ‘angry.’ It starts with a ‘g.’ Try it again.”
“Oh, grumpy!” Mario exclaimed. He must have recalled reading that word with his teacher earlier.
Maria praised him.
He completed the book and asked me to sign his paper. Maria spoke up.
“I already completed it, Mom. You just need to sign your name.”
I looked at the paper. It had the book’s title on it, the date, and then the words “Mario did amazing!” in the Comments section. I felt a burst of happiness at the entire sight, and knew my Wednesday would be wonderful.

Olympic joy

February 9, 2014February 9, 2014Leave a comment

We were all watching the Opening Ceremony of the Olympics on Friday night. Even Rocco. The ballet piece was fabulous and I commented how I wish I would have continued to practice ballet when I was young.

“Why?” Maria asked.

“Because I could have been a famous ballerina and you could have seen me perform all over the world.”

Maria turned around from her perch on my lap and sweetly said “then you wouldn’t be the mom you are today.”
Mario added “yea, we love you just the way you are.”

It was a marvelous way to end the night.

They both snuggled against me: Ri laid her head on my leg and Mario cozied against my chest and under my right arm.

The ballerina twirled. I kissed Mario’s head. I held Ri’s hand. Yes indeed. This is way better than being a ballerina.

"MOM!"

Adventures in the Life of a Working Mama

Category: Family