Heaven = A Full Night’s Sleep

September 13, 2013Leave a comment

I remember when Maria was born and didn’t sleep for more than an hour and a half at a time. Jon and I were so sleep deprived we could barely muster a “hello” in the morning (I’d walk past him with a grunt and a scowl to hand off Ri so I could sleep for two hours and then the reverse would happen when it became Jon’s turn to sleep). I remember looking in the mirror at 3 pm and swearing I was looking at a ninety year old version of me. I experienced every single effect noted in this sleep deprivation article.

My mom came up from Cincy one evening about three weeks after Ri’s birth. She didn’t bring food, toys, diapers or blankets for us like other visitors had done. She brought something much more valuable – sleep. She allowed Jon and I to go up in our room, close the door, and sleep for seven hours straight. At that moment, I would have paid 1 million dollars for such a gift (sorry mom, too late now). We woke the next morning and were actually pleasant with one another. We gave each other a morning kiss and skipped downstairs. Our moods were massively changed after just one full night of sleep.

Fast forward to present. Both kids sleep through the night. They don’t wake to be nursed or held or walked. It’s beautiful. What we’ve been waiting for after years of sleep deprivation torture. So what do our smart selves do? Get a puppy and start the process all over again!

I was seriously sporting all of those sleep deprived “effects” on Tuesday after a weekend of crate training and whining. Jon was out of town for work and it was going to be me and the kids and Rocco for the week. But my sis pulled through and told me she’d come to Columbus for a few days. She arrived Tuesday afternoon and left Thursday afternoon and it was the same renewed and refreshed feeling I had when my mom came up to watch Ri. I went to bed at 10 pm on Tuesday and slept until 6:30 am. Pure Heaven. Sarah stayed up with the puppy and got him out of his kennel to pee in the middle of the night. I was so close to making out with her when I walked downstairs the next morning.

Energy had flowed back into my body and I could actually process a thought. I was ecstatic! Sarah whooped that puppy into shape walking it and playing with it and getting it to stop chewing its leash. She is a born puppy master. I was so sad to see her depart on Thursday afternoon (as was Ri who begged her to stay so they could keep going to Stauf’s and making cookies). But she left me in a much better place – awake and alert, pleasant, beautiful and loving this little butterball of a dog.

Back at it again

September 8, 2013September 8, 2013Leave a comment

We got our new puppy Friday night! Jon decided on a breeder six hours away in Bad Axe, Michigan. We’ve spent the last month trying to determine whether we want a female or male. We opted for a male because we had good luck with Cy and the majority of the last twenty sights I viewed opined that male labs were better than females. Then we spent days trying to decide whether to get a light one or darker one. Pathetic. By the time Jon went to get him on Friday afternoon, I gladly turned the choice over to him.

He Face Timed me for a few minutes when he got there so I saw the yellow one and the white one. They were both adorable, of course. Jon spent an hour running around with them before he chose our honey boy.

He was the most mellow of the group; he didn’t bark a lot and was just playful enough. He whimpered just a tiny bit on the way home for Jon. The kids and I waited anxiously on the front lawn waiting for the newest member of our clan. We rushed the truck when Jon pulled up. He opened the back door and there was this little chunk-a-lunk pumpkin seed boy curled up in his kennel. I did not expect him to be so small but I also didn’t realize he was only 7 weeks old. He flopped around in the grass and allowed all of us to pet his belly and rub him all over. His eyes are little almonds and his puppy fur slightly hangs over them. He’s got a honey waxy coat with patches of light streaked throughout his tiny body. He’s got the shiniest black pads on his paws and when he lays down on his belly and spreads out his legs, we all melt. In sum, he’s gorgeous….
And he’s tiring. I stayed up with him all night just like I did with the kids when they were newborns. I went to sleep at midnight. He whined a bit and I of course stayed up to surf the net about crate training. I fell asleep only to be awoken at 1:30 to more whining. I waited until he stopped and then I got him out of his crate to go outside. He peed and I was ecstatic (just like I used to get when Ri and Mario burped – what a life!). I crated him immediately and heard nothing. Alleluia. I went upstairs and checked on the crew who were all sleeping soundly. I woke Jon and he told me to just go to bed. But I was awake because I heard him whimpering. I went downstairs and laid on the couch waiting for him to stop. He finally stopped about fifteen minutes later. I woke him at 4 am and took him out again and he pooped. And pooped. And dragged his butt on the ground. And dragged it again. I’ve had too many dogs to not know that’s a sign for the dreaded worms. Sure enough, I walked back in with him at 4:15 and lifted up his tail and a little white worm was waving at me. I was at once disgusted and validated.
I went upstairs to tell Jon who was anything but caring at 4:15 am, and laid in bed beside him hoping worms weren’t lethal (knowing very well they weren’t but having nothing more to fret about).

The kids woke at 6:15 ready to see their pup. We took him outside as the sun was slowly rising and watched him do his business. The kids tumbled around with him and held him like a baby. They are already seriously hooked. Jon and I met eyes and didn’t have to speak. It’s happening all over again. Interrupted nights, early mornings, constant pee breaks… just when we had the kids potty trained and fairly independent we turn back the clock. But it’s all worth it.

Mario continues to party

September 5, 2013September 5, 20131 Comment

I started Mario’s birthday off right yesterday. I brought him home a chocolate long john donut after my run (of course, I brought me one home, too, which defeats the purpose of the run but how can one resist?!). He was on the living room floor in his boxers playing on the iPad. I serenaded “happy birthday” to him and got a big ol’ Mario grin from him.

I took cupcakes into school for him. The night before, three moms asked if I was making homemade cupcakes as if buying Kroger brand ones was a sin. Sure enough, as soon as we walked in the room, a mom of a little girl in Mario’s class held a box full of homemade goodies with colorful stickers pronouncing “Harriet is 6!” I shot her a look and continued on with my synthetic neon-colored iced cupcakes with my chin up high.

I returned to Mario’s school at 1:30 to help pass out the cupcakes. I juggled three calls and document drafting from 12:30-1:15 to get to the school on time. I swore a while back that when I made a commitment to my kids it would take a major catastrophe for me to not show up. And it was worth the juggling. Mario beamed when I showed up and took me all over the playground.

He even let me get a picture of him with Harriet. It took all my might to explain to him I had to leave and come back to get him but he finally let me go. I ran home to mow the grass so my folks and Patty would not see a jungle, and went straight back to pick him and Quinn and Maria up. Ri ran up to me and asked “did Mario get his name called on the announcements for his birthday?” I told her I didn’t know. Her flippant response:
“No, he didn’t. Do you know who did? Ms. Harriet. That is who. She has the nerve to have the same birthday as Mario and she took all the credit. I marched down to Ms. Bauer’s (the office assistant) office and told her they forgot my brother’s birthday.”

“Will they announce him tomorrow?”

“They better” she replied. Then she added “Harriet may not make it to school on Friday….” My mouth dropped and I started cracking up. She is her father’s child. He is Mr. Protective over his family and she is just like him. Of course, she started laughing too and meant no harm towards sweet Harriet but if you didn’t know her, you might think…!

Mario hugged Quinn like it had been years they were apart and we headed home. I went back into work for a couple hours while Ri and Sophie decked out the house with birthday decorations. Grandma Ionno came to help. We met up with Mama Meg and Peepaw and Sarah and Jorge at Barleys for dinner. We reminisced about the time Mario was in his crib and Jon went in to get him. He asked if I was home and Jon said no. Then he pulled out his binkie and said “well then I want Grandma (Ionno)”. Gotta love him. And the times that Sarah would come in town and Ri would cry “No Sarah” whenever she got near me. Ahh, fun times.
After dinner, Maria had a game “for people age 18 and older” when we got home. It did not involve alcohol unfortunately. But it was precious. She had paper slips in little wine glasses and each couple had to fill out the paper based on the question she gave us. Each question related to Mario’s future. Jon and I got “how many kids will Mario have?” I wrote 5 (Jon wanted 0). Sarah and Jorge got “what kind of pets would Mario have?” They wrote a “guinea pig named Spike, mini pig named Porky, fish named Fluffy, and dog named Pirate.” Pirate is now a leading choice in pup names for us. Meg and dad got “what will Mario do when he gets older?” They wrote “be an acrobat in Circue de Soleil.” Love it, and weirdly perceptive.
Patty got “where will Mario live?” She wrote “in Rome Italy with me.”

After the game wrapped up, Ri quipped “This boy of ours is going to have an interesting life.” Indeed.

Ri asked Mario the same questions we answered and he said he’d have 1 kid, 3 dogs, be an acrobat, and live in Marion with Grandma Ionno. Meg and dad won with Patty a close second!
We ate sheet cake and laughed at these crazy little beings we call our kids. Mario opened his presents and fainted when he got Skylanders from Ri (she used her gift card from Christmas to buy them).

He got a Ninjago t-shirt to go with the Lego set Grandma Ionno got him on Sunday. She spoils him rotten. He about fell over again when he opened Grandma Meg’s and Peepaw’s gift – a Mario Bros. wii game. Sarah and Jorge brought him coins from all over the world (he will appreciate those when he’s a world traveling acrobat) and a bullseye and stand for his target shooting! We got him shoes and undies (definitely a parent gift) and a new bike. He certainly is loved.

The party had to close down at 9 since school was happening in the morning. Jon left with everyone else to pick up a kennel from Sherry. Nothing like stepping from one party to another – Jon brings home our new pup tomorrow night.

Labor Day Chaos

September 3, 2013September 3, 2013Leave a comment

I am feeling this past weekend as I turn off my watch alarm clock that I purposefully set even later this morning with the hopes I’d climb out of bed and take a run. But the magnetic power of Ri on my right side and Mario on my left and Jon on the far right (thank god for king sized beds) drew me closer to the sheets and farther from my running shoes.

In my twenties, this would have happened because of a night of partying: shots devoured, beer guzzled, and feet moving to the beat. Now this happens because of traveling all over the state with kids in tow visiting relatives, swimming, playing, and stopping at McDonald’s for rest room breaks every thirty minutes. It’s exhausting. But we’ll worth it.

Mario rocked out his football game on Saturday with two touchdowns and two pulled flags. He was a superstar. Jon and I were so charged up for him because he had been getting so mad at practice about not getting the ball. I was like a crazed woman out on the field screaming like a lunatic for him. I can’t imagine what I will be like when he’s older.

We left for Cincy later in the day with the hopes of heading to my old grade school’s festival and seeing some friends. Unfortunately, as soon as we hit the outskirts of Cincy a sheet of grey covered us and lightning and thunder came clammoring down on us. I hate driving in that weather and proceeded to white knuckle it to my mom’s house. Mario was fascinated with the lightning letting me know every time he saw a flash. Ri kept me in line: when I whispered “shit” under my breath after a car jerked in front of me, she scolded “listen lady, you need to replace that “i” with an “o” so you say shoot and not the bad word.

Lou and mom and Rod greeted us at the door with a tasty sheet cake awaiting us. We couldn’t wait to dig into it so we had Gracie and Liz over and sang happy birthday to Mario. He took forever to think of a wish but eventually blew out the candles so we could eat the world’s best food: sheet cake.

The cousins played downstairs together for a while so mom and I could catch up on her new third shift schedule. I’m amazed at how well Grace and Ri and Mario get along. They played barbies and watched Spongebob (tv always bonds, heh?). At about 8:30, mom and I decided to head over to Nativity festival with the hopes it wasn’t canceled even though it was still raining. No luck. But we did get to go inside and see where I used to have lunch and music class. I was more excited to see it than the kids.

We made up for the disappointment of the festival by heading to Skyline at 9:15 at night. Nothing like 4-ways and coney dogs right before bed.

One thing about my mom’s house is that she has really dark shades so you can’t tell when the sun has risen. On the other hand, she has Lou who inevitably pushes the bedroom door with his nose and let’s the light in that way. He performed that trick at 6:45 am on Sunday morning. I rose to go downstairs with the kids and had that feeling I typically get on weekend mornings when we rise that early: “how am I gonna get through this whole day??”

But we started it out well walking with the pups through the Timbers. Mario got to pet other dogs and Ri got to walk Willie. And our reward was home-made goetta and pancakes from Aunt Julie. Ri is such the Cincy girl – she loves goetta more than any other meat. After breakfast, we walked to the park with Grace. The kids performed shows for us at the amphitheater and swung on the swings. Mario helped me push Grace and Ri tried to morph into a two year old by squeezing herself into a baby swing. I was so irritated trying to get her out but had to laugh when she exclaimed “I’m making progress mom – I almost have one cheek out!” The girl is a trip. We eventually got her freed and she stayed away from the swings the rest of the time. Mario loved the creek. He must have thrown ten different sized sticks in the water to see if they would all go down the waterfall. The heavier ones didn’t and he noted that by sticking his finger in the air and calling himself a “great scientist!”

After the park, we got treated to some Aunt Jane and Julie time…and we got treated to round two of cake and ice cream. Ri and Mario don’t know how lucky they are to have such a supportive and loving family. It warms my heart to see the aunts who helped raise me help me raise my kiddos.

Next up, swimming! Thankfully, the kids wanted to go to the Timbers pool rather than Blue Ash so we threw on our suits and crossed the street. Mario showed off his dives and Ri and Gracie made a huge contraption with noodles.

Our last dip in the pool until next year. We dropped ourselves in the bath after the pool and finally got the stink off Mario’s feet. He doesn’t wear socks with his shoes (“they don’t feel good with socks”) so his feet and shoes are disgusting. After baths, we reluctantly left the Timbers to head home. My mom was rightfully exhausted after our tornados came through but she always misses us as soon as we leave. Meg and Patty feel the same. You can’t wait for some peace and quiet but then you can’t wait for some chaos again.

I was a few hundred feet from the highway home when I made a brash call to head to Nativity’s festival. I had to let Mario play Big Six. It was my favorite game as a kid and he was so excited about winning money. He loved it just as much as I did. Ri was ready to stop gambling after she won some quarters but Mario got bit by the bug and it took all my night to pull him away. They both ended up pocketing quarters in the end, and I lost $20. Never fails.

The kids and I and Jon met back at the house at 10 pm and we all crashed hard. 5 am came way too early but I did my sisterly duty and picked up Sarah at the Mega Bus station at 5:30 am. And what did we do at 5:45 am when we got home? Went for a five mile run. Why not? It was actually a wonderful run with the moon shining over us. It almost makes me want to get up at that time every morning… but then it doesn’t.
We hit Stauf’s at 8 am with Jorge and dogs in tow. Again, I looked at my watch and thought “I’ve been going since 5 am and I have an entire day left to go. Ahhhh!” But it only got better from there.

We drove up to Marion to have a family celebration at Patty’s house with all of Jon’s brothers and some of their kids. We also visited Jon’s dad in the rehab center. The kids love seeing their cousins. It never ceases to amaze me how close they are even when we don’t see each other for months. They fished on the bridge into the pond, swam at the country club, and played in the basement. Maria cried and cried when we had to leave. I got to chat with Jon’s brothers and wives and Sherry and Micah and reminisce about old times and laugh about new ones (Micah and Sherry and Mario comparing biceps size (Sherry won)). Patty and I got to experience Mario holding her hand as we walked through the rehab center and saying “this is a nice place for grandpa to be.” It broke her heart. And Maria giving a gentle peck on Joe’s cheek when we left for the night. We have some sensitive, empathetic kids.

And here I am on Tuesday night forgetting about the lethargy I felt this morning and grateful for all of my family and the joy they contribute to this one amazing life.

Mr. Mom

August 29, 2013August 29, 20131 Comment

A few days ago, Jon took Mario to his eye doctor appointment at 8:30 am and then took Maria to her dentist appointment at 3:20 in the afternoon because I got caught up in work. When we both had a chance to sit on the bed and talk for two minutes (while the kids showered), he chuckled “I was Mr. Mom today.” I immediately hurled that comment back at him. “Really? Mr. Mom? I do this all the time when you are gone!”

It was a knee-jerk reaction. Something I’m used to laughing/lamenting about with my girlfriends (“he does the dishes and its a big deal”; “he gives the kids a bath and he’s a savior”). After all, who hasn’t read studies in ten different articles on how much more housework and kid-work women typically do over men?

And Jon would completely agree that our situation confirms those studies.
But we make it work. I love running around outdoors with the kids, and would much prefer that over taking the cars in for oil changes, which Jon gladly does. I love mowing the grass and washing the floors over paying the bills on-line and heading to the bank, which Jon would much prefer. Are there times I am annoyed at him for not folding laundry? Yep. But are there times he has no desire to drive to the library to return the videos? Yep. We know each others’ strengths and preferred activities and have an unwritten rule as to who typically does what.

Jon’s reaction that night was not so much one of anger and defensiveness as it was hurt. He simply wanted me to acknowledge what he had done – moved meetings all around in order to take Mario to the doctor for an hour and a half, drive him to school for an always less-than-pleasant drop off, drive to work, drive to Ri’s school and take her to the dentist, and head back to work. Not so much to ask. I’d be looking for the same acknowledgment if I was him.

And, he would have given it to me. He’s the first one to tell me and anyone else in the room that I’m a rock star and that I’m the best mom and wife ever. He tells it to me all the time. So put away the studies and the stereotypes for a minute and stick with the basic human need to feel appreciated. That goes a long way in a marriage… and friendship.

Yesterday morning, I had to be at a 7:30 am meeting so Jon had to take the kids to school. He did not complain about it even though I know he was stressed with work and other issues.

So tonight, when we finally get a chance to sit down together and talk about our day, I will definitely make sure to address him as “Mr. Mom.”

Keeping us laughin’

August 26, 2013August 26, 2013Leave a comment

Our girl. She is a rock. While Mario is having a hard time in kindergarten, she remains stoic and independent, heading into class by herself and trying to toughen up Mario. “Buck it up!” she continues to tell him.

When we were at Bob Evans on Saturday night,our waitress spilled a glass of water all over the table. Jon looked a bit annoyed because it almost got all over him and Maria bitingly said “we’ll, she has got to be new since she can’t even balance the water.” Little sass girl. Sure enough, two minutes later the waitress returned with napkins and said “I’m sorry, I’m in training.” Ri smiled at all of us.

When Jon explained to the kids that he was just tired from a long week, Maria scolded him. “You need to learn to meditate, dad. You just put your palms together and hummmmm.”

She surely keeps us laughing, which is exactly what we need right now. Love ya girlie.

Kindergarten woes

August 24, 2013August 24, 20131 Comment

Ri took this picture earlier this week at drop off to kindergarten. I was trying to console Mario who was completely distressed at the thought of going to school. Jon and I were taken aback with this behavior because Mario has been so excited to start at Maria’s school.

Every single day was awful. He cried and pled to leave with me. He asked to be “disqualified from Kindergarten.” He begged to stay home “just one more day.” It was heart-wrenching to look in his tear-filled eyes and see that baby boy pout. The worst was Friday. The guidance counselor came in to be with him while I left. She asked him if he wanted to draw. He shook his his head no. Then she said;

“Let’s go see Mr. Hopper, the bunny rabbit.”

Mario shook his head no again.

The counselor said: “Come on, it will be fun. You can even take a friend with you.”

Mario’s response: “Ok, I will take my mom.”

My heart crumbled. I’m his friend. I so can’t wait to use that when he is a teenager.

In my mind, I know that he is going to be just fine and we will look back at this transition and find humor in it. After all, he runs down the steps after school in a great mood. But in my heart, I am sick to my stomach as I walk out the doors every morning. I just want to start my day with a smiling child. So, I am dedicating my free time to researching every website about how to deal with a child that hates kindergarten. I know it will likely be a task of futility because every kid is different and I need to just figure out what Mario needs… but it makes me feel better. Probably by the time I have researched every site, Mario will have acclimated to Kindergarten and all the techniques I read about will be useless. Let’s hope….

Mario’s first lost tooth

August 21, 2013August 21, 2013Leave a comment

After a week of tugging and pulling, Mario lost his first tooth last night while eating a chicken nugget in the back seat of Jon’s truck.

“I felt something hard in my chicken nugget and it was my tooth!”

He had made it bleed earlier in the day with me and I had told him to stop pulling at it and let it come out naturally. So much for listening to mom. It was welcome excitement after spending most of the day at Children’s Hospital getting his left eye examined due to a cut that his best friend Quinn gave him while dancing.

He has high expectations for the Tooth Fairy. He woke up this morning and found five single dollar bills under his pillow. He counted them out one by one and when he got to the last one, he sighed and said in an exasperated tone:

“I got five dollars.”

“Five dollars! I only got 25 cents when I was a kid.” (I have to add my “I walked ten miles uphill and barefoot” stories in as much as possible).

He looked at me with an understanding expression but then quickly added “Dad still owes me $5 for allowance so at least I will have $10.”

I’m worried he is going to start yanking at all of his teeth in order to get up to $25.

Rocco Awesome goes to school

August 15, 2013August 15, 2013Leave a comment

Dear Mario:

Mom and dad love you to the moon and stars and sun and back. How many times have I said “Hey Mario, guess what?” And how many times have you replied “I know, you love me to the moon and stars and sun and back.”

As I walked out of your classroom this morning feeling a little nervous about how your first day in kindergarten would go but also really excited for you to experience school and all that it entails, I thought about all the times we had mouthed those precious words to one another: “I love you to the moon and stars and sun and back….”

I hope that when you start to feel a little lonely or scared, you will reach for those words and they will lift you up and bring you the confidence to get through the day. Because you are an incredible little being full of imagination and curiosity, and dad and I have no doubt you will take that kindergarten class by storm!

You have been so excited to start school – counting down the number of days since the end of Spring. We could tell you were a little nervous this morning but you got dressed and packed your lunch and put on your book bag like a pro. And when we talked about walking in with you, you demanded to walk in alone. Eventually, you let down your guard somewhat and let us walk in behind you.

You did exactly as Ri instructed – placed your book bag on your pre-selected hook, deposited your lunch box in the bin and stuck your magnet on “Packing.”

Then you sat at your desk and began to complete your first kindergarten task: draw flowers in a vase. Other kids ran around and held onto parents but you got to work. After all, you’ve been anxiously awaiting homework since watching your sis do it all last year!

And then we said goodbye.

And you shyly looked up with those melting eyes and that perfect face and I wanted to sweep you out of the chair and take you with me. But instead I smiled , hugged you, told you you’d be great and walked towards the door. Dad hugged you, too, and gave you a fist pump. You waved at us with a bit of hesitancy but also a bit of pride. You were officially in kindergarten, and you had completed your first task as instructed by your teacher.

You are going to be a superstar; we have no doubt about it. After all, you did name yourself “Rocco Awesome” when you were only four years old. We can’t wait to see what’s next.

Love,
Mom and Dad

Can and can’t

August 14, 2013August 14, 2013Leave a comment

We have decided this is it.
You can’t go any farther than third grade.
You can’t get any taller or lose any more teeth.
You can’t need a bra.
You can’t keep getting bigger feet.
You can’t grow out of stuffed animals.
You can’t giggle about cute boys.
You can’t put on deodorant.
You can’t want to walk home by yourself.
You can’t want me to stop at your classroom door.

Ok, we know all of those are impossible but can you at least fulfill some of the “can’s” below…

You can stay our baby.
You can keep hugging us.
You can kiss us a thousand times a day.
You can snuggle with us.
You can laugh so hard with us and Mario that you fall off your chair.
You can draw us pictures.
You can ask us to rub your back.
You can sit on our laps.
You can talk to us about anything.

We know you are gonna have an incredible third grade year, Ri Grace, and we love you so very much! Always stay curious and open to new possibilities!

Love, Mom and Dad

"MOM!"

Adventures in the Life of a Working Mama

Category: life