Behave as if tomorrow is your last day.
So that has been my motto the last few days. I had to figure out something that would make me pay attention to all of the wonders before me: my hubby and kids, my family, my home, warm socks, Lucky Charms cereal. I had such a maddening couple of weeks at work that I lost balance and found myself on the low end of the see-saw that was stuck in the mud on the ground. I’d come home to kids who yelled “Mom!” and I would put on a smile for them but as they ran away to get a game to play or show me a cool toy, my smile vanished and I stood in the room all funked out. It didn’t help that I got my hair cut in those same maddening work weeks. I went to a new gal and told her I wanted bangs.
“Just make me blond and give me bangs – what the hell,” I told her one night after work.
Usually stylists are hesitant to make that move, especially if you are a new client. But this gal had bright red hair, tattoos everywhere, and quite a few piercings so if I told her to go for it, she was going for it – no questions asked. She completed her work and I wanted to sob. Yellow canary hair and straight, straw-like bangs. I couldn’t have looked less attractive. We took another hour and a half to tone down the yellow but I still walked away feeling like a mix between a monster and an 80’s punk rocker. It didn’t help that when I walked in the house, Jon’s mouth dropped and all he could say was “Oh My God.” Actually, he said one more word after that. “Thor.” Yeah, he called me “Thor.” I couldn’t really remember what Thor looked like but I knew he was making fun of me. A few minutes, he called me into his office with the kids. He had a picture of “Thor” on his computer screen, and pointed to it. The kids felt my pain and responded “that does not look like mom, dad! Only his hair looks like mom!” I wanted to crawl into bed and not return to society.
But alas, within a couple of hours, I was laughing with them about my hair and putting it all into perspective. It’s just a haircut, heh? Really, so I look like a male warrior, it could be worse. Not sure how, but it could be.
And so I decided this weekend that I would turn myself around – change my negative thinking and get on with it. I am now back on balance somewhat. Riding close to the middle of the see-saw. I even managed to handle a trip out to Dover on Saturday with Jon, the kids and Patty and Joe. I was a little frantic about the trip on Friday night because I wanted that day to prepare for Jon and I’s Cancun trip. I had also found out from Vicki a few nights earlier that the baby shower we were heading to (hence the trip to Dover) was going to have 100 people and be three hours long. Baby showers are those necessary evils that you must attend because a baby is going to be born! When you are the mother-to-be, it is the greatest ever. When you are a guest, it can be taxing at times, especially when there are 60+ gifts to open. But the visit went much better than anticipated. I got to spend time with Patty, and the kids got to torture her in the backseat by making her watch Homer Simpson iPad games and color rulers. We got to eat cupcakes and talk to Vicki and look at all the sute baby clothes that Stacy got. Maria got to sit next to Bianca and listen to her and her friend talk about random things like make-up, hair and boys. She was mesmerized. There were a few other little girls 
there ranging from ages 3 to 10. Maria was ok playing with the three-year old because she just held her around the lobby but she was completely awkward around the 10 year old girls. I had to stand out in the hall with her for 20 minutes making conversation with the other girls (who were just sweet as can be). When I finally told Ri I had to go back ot the party, she stood out there a few more minutes but then came back inside. She eventually went back out in the hall after some prodding and had a good time with the girls but she is not the chatty-kathys like Patty and me. She has got her dad in her in that area. She has always been one to choose to hang with the adults – even when she was three years old. It is that old soul in her.
We went back to Big Mario’s and Vicki’s house for some wine and some trampoline jumping (yeah, be careful mixing the two). After an hour or so talking with them, we drove home in near white-out conditions at times. Luckily, Jon drove. Patty and I kept the kids busy (she read an entire Aesop’s Fables book to Mario and I made up stories with Ri) until we got home. Then we ate more cookies and cupcakes and went to sleep at 9:30.
We woke up on a frigid Sunday morning and made chocolate chip-peanut-butter pancakes and eggs. It was heaven. I read them a few facts from the newspaper as we ate (the Pope is resigning; the economy is looking better; the Underground Railroad Freedom Center is in Cincy and we need to go soon). At one point Mario looked up at me with chocloate chips caked around his mouth and all over his hands. I almost let out an exasperated sigh but some other force came over me and I laughed. I laughed hysterically, which caused the kids to laugh hysterically. We couldn’t stop. It was marvelous. And awakening.
The moment took me to the high end of the see-saw.
Last night, we were drawing pictures, and Mario asked Maria how to spell “I’m Going Somewhere.” He then walked over to me and gave me the picture. I couldn’t read it at first and then I got it. I asked “you are going somewhere? Where?” Mario’s response: “Don’t know yet but I will figure it out. I will wait until tomorrow.” 
Tonight, he asked Maria to go upstairs with him. Ri ran back downstairs and breezed past me. I asked her what she was doing and she quickly replied “Getting some cool shoes for Mario.” They both came back down ten minutes later and Mario looked too cool for school with his double layered oxford shirts, new jeans and sweet man-watch on his wrist. Maria grabbed the body crayons and drew tattoos on his arms.
Jon told him that he was free to go (the mom in me could not let him leave even though I knew Jon would sneak out and watch over him). Mario put on his coat and hat and gloves and he said goodbye to Ri. Ri bawled and begged him not to go because he could be stolen by someone in the night. He told her he’d be fine.
The kids had a marvelous Christmas holiday – how couldn’t they with all of their family around and all of the gifts to open. They got little gifts in their stockings on Sunday morning, including a Justin Bieber poster and an Avengers poster. On Christmas Eve, they got loaded down with presents at my mom’s house, including two Razor scooters that they jumped on and rode like pros (I couldn’t balance on one to save my life). They ran around with all of the cousins at the Heile’s get-together and got another load of presents from their great aunts. Maria even scored a Justin Bieber notebook and frame from the white elephant exchange (she also begged Susie to give her the Barbie doll head that Susie nabbed out of the exchange; Susie finally gave in and gave it to her in exchange for wearing Ri’s headband for five minutes).
Maria woke up first on Christmas morning. She kept clearing her throat in her room to try and wake us up. Finally, she sauntered into our room and gave me a big hug along with a “Merry Christmas, Mom!” Precious. Mario ran in five minutes later all glassy-eyed and disheveled. When he saw Ri’s face and heard her excitement, he woke up and yelled “It’s Christmas! Lets go downstairs people!” We headed down the steps, turned the corner and witnessed a ton of gifts left by Santa. He even left some cookie crumbs which Maria happily picked up and threw into her mouth. “Santa left some crumbs for me, mom!”
Grandma Meg, Peepaw, Sarah, Jorge and Jackson (yes, even party animal Jackson) arrived at 10 am. The kids pulled all of their arms up the stairs to show off their presents from Santa and spoke in lightening speed about their mornings. Peepaw tried to sneak downstairs to assemble Mario’s trampoline but Mario smelled him out like a bloodhound and quickly descended to the basement. Mario ended up assembling his present with Peepaw and Jorge. When they finished, Mario dashed up the steps and begged us all to see the creation he helped make. We don’t think he quite understood that was his present. Nonetheless, he loved it and bounced from the chair to the trampoline over and over.
We ate some yummy quiche with the eggs from Meg-pie’s chickens and cinnamon rolls, and then we opened presents. The kids kept with their routine and ripped open their presents with a fury. Ri got a horsey comforter and sheets and some awesome books and puzzle. I keep hoping some book series will entice her. Sarah and I are hoping Judy Blume books will do the trick. Mario got his trampoline and a puzzle and a Spanish/English kids book filled with photographs that Jorge took. After they tore through their presents, the adults opened their presents one-by-one. The Menkedick tradition – to hum and hem over each present that one receives. I scored big with a new coat, a collection of CDs with music selected by Jack, two books from Sarah, and two incredible framed photos of Ri and Mario. Sitting around a circle together and watching each other open gifts is one of my favorite traditions of the holiday. It brings back memories of Christmas pre-parenthood when I watched Sar and Jack squeal in delight over a truck or a doll from Santa.
After present opening, we greeted the Ionno crew. Patty brought her signature delicious homemade treats – peanut brittle, chocolate cashews, pretzel rolos, and other fine concoctions. She also slipped in some Iced Cake Vodka that she enjoys lately over ice. Between her and Meg, I have a feeling my day is coming to become a Vodka drinker! Patrick and Carrie and Alana and Gio arrived and all of the adults were kicked to the curb – the kids had each other and had no more need for “old people” as Maria endearingly refers to us. Connie and Chris brought more cookies and treats. Why do we even have a dinner on Christmas? We should just go to town on sugar all day and then fall asleep at 7 pm.
Jon’s prime rib was fantastic. Meg made a beautiful fruit salad with pomegranate seeds and kiwi. Bill and Patty baked yummy corn casseroles. I had laid out a lottery ticket on each person’s plate and it ended up being an Ionno versus Menkedick battle to see which family won the most money. The Ionno’s ended up with $9 and the Menkedick’s with $1. We not only lost the money competition but had to do the dishes because someone quickly made a rule that the family who won the least amount of money had to do dishes. My family, minus my Uncle Bill, suddenly had to hit the road to take care of their horses and dogs. Likely story…. So Bill and I put on our gloves and grabbed the kitchen towels and began to work. We are good sports. Patty felt bad and jumped in to help. All other Ionno’s sat around the dining room table and smirked! The Menkedick’s will prevail next year.
Then came the fifth round of present opening for Ri and Mario. Patty brought her big red bags full of toys for each kid. They did a good job taking turns reaching in their bags and looking at their gifts. Patty got the girls a photo Barbie and the boys a spy phone among many other things. After they ripped through the packages, they wolfed down some cookies and headed upstairs to get in some more play. Ri and Alana came up with a plan to have Patty take them back to her house. Of course, she agreed. They packed up clothes and went straight to Patty’s car without even saying goodbye to me or Carrie. Yea, Jon and I have no doubt that we will be fighting with the teenage Ri about curfews. Everyone took off around 6 pm, and Jon and I and Mario sat in the family room together feeling like it was midnight.
"MOM!" 