Tag: Maria

127 Hours

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Maria and Mario post-mulching (Mario was proud of his dirty face and hands!

I had both kids in bed by 9:50 on Thursday night.  Amazing, and quite early for Mr. Mario who typically refuses to go to bed unless I lay down with him (especially when Jon is out of town).  I had to shower in the evening due to fingernails filled with dirt and mulch in my hair.  The kids and I hit up the flower store earlier and bought 10 bags of mulch – we got through 4 of them before the kids were ready to move on to better things, namely, dinner for Maria and basketball for Mario.  While I was soaking in the shower, Mario fell asleep in my bed (and Maria hit the hay as soon as her head fell on her pillow).  What a gift of time! 

Maria biking and Mario running

I think the mulching and the run up the street to the pizza store helped wear the boy out. Lately, Maria has been all about her bike and Mario has been all about walking/running.  He can make it a mile without stopping to take a breath or rest.  He has got his mom’s lungs.  Maria keeps us truckin’ because she zooms on her bike – the same bike she has had since she was three with training wheels wobbling, rust growing and princess stickers falling off.  I think a new bike may be in order for her 6th b-day.

Back to my evening.  I got downstairs at 10:15, cleaned up the living room and kitchen, and flipped through the movies on pay-per-view.  One of my favorite past times is hitting up the movie theatre with popcorn and pop in tow (and usually a box of whoopers or goobers).  Since I could not leave the children alone (oh, how tempting!), I had to be content with the tv, chips and dip, and a diet 7Up.  I flipped through the new releases and it came down to Black Swan and 127 Hours.   My brother gave 127 Hours rave reviews and it was only one and a half hours long.  It won. 

I’d give it a 5 out of 10.  It kept my interest for the most part but there were times in it that I grew impatient watching James Franco make videos of himself.  I know the director wanted the audience to get as accurate and real a picture of this climber being stuck in this crevice – his arm wedged into the rock by another rock – but I thought it dragged out a little too long.  However, Franco did an excellent job recreating the absolute horror and intensity of cutting off his arm.  The detail of that scene itself sticks to my bones.  The ending failed to meet my expectations, too.  I didn’t feel an ultimate connection with Franco at the end, which is something I look forward to in watching a movie (Annette Benning wowed me in The Kids Are Alright).  

There was one scene right before Franco cut off his arm where Franco was beginning to give up and he had a vision of himself with his future son.  That part struck me because I remembered back when I had a minor health scare.  There were about two weeks where I waited to hear back from my doctor.  Maria and Mario were both born, and the only thing that kept me up at night was the thought of leaving them at such a young age and not being able to watch them grow.  When I was pregnant with Maria, I still remember thinking that I could never love her as much as I loved our pup, Cy.  Sad but true (and it did take about 3 months to love her as much because she was such a fussy baby)!  But now I cannot imagine not being a part of their lives and the amount of love that I have for them feels limitless.

Maria and Mario in a loving state before school!

The next morning I paid for my “crazy movie night” when Maria and Mario woke me up at 6:45 am.  I felt like I had slept 2 hours.  It reaffirmed the fact that I need to go to bed by 10:30.  The kids knew I was tired and took care of me by getting dressed in a reasonable amount of time and walking the entire way to school.  When we arrived, Maria began to pout and complain that she did not want to be in school.  She did not want me to leave.  She has been getting like this lately, especially on the weeks that Jon is gone.  I hugged her and told her that she would have a great day, and without prompting, Mario also hugged and her and said “Don’t worry, Ri, school will be fun and I will play with you this afternoon.”  She planted a long, hard smooch on his cheek, and we walked home. 

I told Mario I was proud of him for helping out his sister, and he looked at me and replied “I love my sissy.”  Watching their relationship continue to grow is a gift for Jon and I.  Jon returned that night, and the kids were ecstatic to see him walk through the door. Echos of “DADDY” still ring through my head.  Later that evening, Jon and I relaxed in our normal fashion – Jon with some tv and me with my computer, and I was fast asleep by 10:30.

Entering Steeler Country

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It was a simple choice for Spring Break.  No, not Miami, not Charleston, not Disney but rather – Pittsburgh, PA!  Not that anyone would be wondering why Pittsburgh but just in case….

Aunt Sarah lives there!  And Uncle Jorge.  And Stella and Mona – their dogs. 

Pittsburgh also is home to a few hotels with pools and hot tubs. 

Combine Sarah, Jorge, the dogs and a hotel pool and you have a fantasy Spring Break for me and the kiddies. 

Mario playing Wii and taking forever to get ready for the road!

Mario and I headed out of Columbus at 9:30 am on Thursday morning after I took a morning run (knowing that would be my last free hour without kids by my side), got Mario to stop playing Wii basketball and get dressed, and made a bag of snacks for the road (always a must).  I had loaded the stroller in the car the night before.  And Grandma Meg’s present. I had gotten our duffel bag packed full of clothes, barbies, blankies, and swimsuits and placed it on the couch.  I had packed the camera, money, and stuffed animals in my backpack.  Ready, set, go.  Mario grabbed his book bag filled with the most random items: plastic superhero figurines, socks, bathing suit, and small beach ball.  We gave Cy a big doggie hug and took everything outside to the garage.  Mario, my wild child who cannot simply open the car door and sit in his seat, twirled around in circles and hit his head against the side of the car as I put my book bag in the front seat.  I reached back to pick him up and console him.  When he finally calmed down, I sat him in his seat with his backpack and his pillow pet.  I went around to my side and climbed in the front.  We were off!

Mario provided commentary to me about his power rangers movie on the way out to the farm.  He also kept asking when we would be in “Mexico.”  I think he correlates Mexico with Aunt Sarah since she was there the majority of Mario’s life and he cannot seem to grasp the fact that she has now moved to Pittsburgh.  As we travelled through the countryside looking at cows and horses, my mind suddenly fixated on our duffel bag.  I looked in my rear view mirror and could see everything behind me.  That would be impossible with a big red duffel bag on top of the stroller.  I pulled the car over and opened the back of the car.  No duffel. I left it in the garage as i consoled Mario.

“Sh–, da–…” 

Mario consoling me.

After a slew of inappropriate words outside of the car, I plunked back in my seat.  Mario immediately sensed my frustration.  I told him we forgot our bag with clothes in it and he replied “Mom, don’t worry, I packed my swim trunks in my book bag.” His words touched me, and I realized in the big scheme of this crazy life, there could be many worse situations to be in at that moment.  I laughed and reached my hand back to his hand giving him a kiss in the air.  We continued down the country road to Grandma Meg’s house.  I walked in the door and divulged my forgetfulness to Meg and Maria.  Maria’s reaction was diametrically opposed to Mario’s.  She wailed and then stuttered between sobs, “But, mom, my new bathing suit was in that bag!”  We played with Grandma Meg’s dog and cats, gave her some sweet birthday presents, and hit the road with a full bag of chocolate chip cookies (very dangerous). 

Maria hugging Mona after her good trick.

On to Pittsburgh.  Through Wheeling and past Cabela’s (Jon’s favorite).  When we hit Pittsburgh, we went through the Pitt Tunnel and over the bridge.  The kids interrupted their tv show to admire the sights for three seconds.  Finally, we found ourselves parking at Sarah’s apartment.  We hurried out of the car and into her place before our fingers and faces froze in the Pittsburgh air.  As soon as the door opened, big ol’ Stella and little darling Mona greeted us.  They jumped and yelped and flipped all over the hard wood floors.  Maria and Mario lapped it up.  Mario joined right in with the nonsense running all around and letting Stella jump on her even though Stella is nearly as tall as Mario.  Mario got an ear and eye cleaning 5 times over from Stella who thoroughly enjoyed licking all over his little head after she cornered him.  Maria, on the other hand, earned the nickname “Enforcer” by constantly issuing commands to the dogs and withholding love until they obeyed.  She attempted to teach them tricks (that Aunt Sarah has already taught them, thank god) and put on shows for us, the audience.  Poor Jorge – he is not at all used to this chaos and I am sure that our presence for even a half hour jettisoned the thought of kids far out of his mind!

Mario loving on Stella

After Aunt Sarah’s house, we ate lunch at Pamela\’s Diner.  Yum.  Absolutely delicious banana and granola pancakes with whipped cream and syrup.  Spinach and feta omelette. Onion rings.  Perfect vacation food.  After Pamela’s, we hit the local Target to get some clothes for Mario and me and a bathing suit for Maria Grace.  She chose a black two-piece.  Mario chose some striped overalls in a size too little because he likes to see his socks when he looks down.  After Target, Sarah and Jorge were ready for a little break so we dropped them off and headed to the hotel.  I love the enthusiasm that Maria and Mario bring to simply walking into a hotel.  They bounced all around the lobby while I checked in and ran to the elevator to push the button.  They spotted the pool. 

The Crew at Pamela's

“Mom, look at the pool.  It is right by the elevators so it is so convenient!”  Maria boasted.

Mario merely screeched “The pool! The pool!”

The disgruntled models posing in their suits.

We headed up to floor 6 after Maria let Mario hit the button in the elevator.  This action became a huge source of bargaining and compromise for the next two days as I guess in little kids’ worlds, pushing the button in the elevator is much more cool than pushing it outside of the elevator.  Overall, they did pretty good (with Maria giving into Mario a majority of the times). We stepped in our room (after Maria used the key card in it which Mario found no interest in until the last day) and both kids gasped with excitement.  It had a huge tv, a huge bed, a sofa and a coffee maker (Maria’s favorite).  We threw off our clothes and got in our suits.  

The hotel pool.  AKA, super chlorine-ridden pool.  It wasn’t until Saturday afternoon driving home that I realized how the amount of chlorine in that pool.  Red blotches grew all over my skin and I itched and hurt at the same time.  Maria and Mario did not have it quite as bad but we all still smelled like chlorine after 4 showers.  Nonetheless, it was worth it for the fun we had in the pool and the hot tub.  Maria actually jumped in the pool by herself for the first time and swam over to me at the other end of the pool.  Mario jumped in by himself with his swimmies on his arms and rose up from under the water with a half-scared, half-amazed look on his face that quickly turned to a huge smile.  Aunt Sarah came and played with us that first night acting like a shark with Mario on her back and allowing Mario to push her in the water while she stood “bored” on the side of the pool.  The kids adore her.

Loving the pool.

Sarah hit the road after the swim and we went down to the hotel restaurant for a quick bite.  Maria wanted both chicken fingers and nachos.  I promptly said “no” and the waiter looked at her sullen face and suggested that she could have chicken fingers with just a “few” nachos on the side.  Fifteen minutes later, he brought out four large chicken fingers and an entire plate of nachos with cheese.  Maria said “thank you” without me even having to prompt her!  We ate quickly because Mario was whining and complaining and took the remainder of our meals upstairs.  Maria loved eating in the room while watching tv (she is my child) – she got the roll away desk out and her chair and set up shop.  We fell asleep around 10:30 and woke at 7:30 – not bad for these two poor sleepers. 

Heading up the cathedral steps.

Friday consisted of  jam-packed, action-filled events with Aunt Sarah and Uncle Jorge.  We picked Sarah up at 9:15 and headed to the Cathedral of Learning where she teaches her undergrad course.  She had high hopes for us – to climb up 36 flights of stairs to the top of the cathedral.  Maria and Mario wanted to do it so badly but after 14, their little legs were stinging.  We agreed to make it to floor 15 and take the elevator.  We got to the 36th floor and it treated up to a sight of all of Pittsburgh.  The kids stared down and basked in their glory of climbing half way up the stairs.

Looking out at Pittsburgh

We got to wait outside of the cafe for a half hour while Sarah met with a student.  We people-watched and talked about what it would be like to be in college.  A lot of questions posed to me from Maria about what I did in college (I fibbed a bit about studying hard and never partying).  Finally, it was time to go to Aunt Sarah’s class.  We got there a few minutes early and Sarah was not there yet.  Here students were, however, and we introduced ourselves.  Maria got shy.  Mario stood on the chair in the front of the room and talked about how he loved basketball. 

Mario next to the T Rex

The Carnegie Museum of Natural History is across the street so we headed over there to see the big dinosaur outside.  It wears a different scarf every other day (so I hear).  We decided to go see the dinosaur exhibit.   Four hours later, we left.  The museum housed a plethora of exhibits and kids’ activities.  They got to act like archeologists and dig for bones.  They got to see big mammals and little birds and dinosaur bones.  They got to learn facts about trees and stones in the Discovery Room and they touched fossilized dinosaur dung.  Yeah!

Maria during her archaeological dig

We left the museum for a long walk in Schenley Park with Sarah, Jorge and the pups.  What an incredible park to have so close to their disposal.  I felt like I had entered a state park.  A stream, rock bridge, trail, huge trees.  Maria walked the dogs through the entire park only getting help once in a while from Sarah or Jorge.  I carried Mario the entire way who had collapsed at the entrance from exhaustion.  My hips and shoulders felt like someone had stabbed them a million times at the end of the trip.  But so worth it.  We grabbed our suits after the park because we just needed a little more action and we headed to the pool with Sarah and Jorge.  Jorge became Maria’s servant shortly after we jumped in the water.  “Jorge, come now.” “Jorge, over here!”  And, Jorge earned his “uncle” title that afternoon by divulging Maria’s demands and playing with her incessantly until we all called it quits.  Sarah earned her title as well by sword fighting with Mario in the hot tub and submerging her head under when he won.  

The crew in the hot tub

To top off the day, we headed to The Church Brew Works, a restaurant housed in an old church.  We got there at 7 pm – way too late for the kids we would find out.  I knew it was a long shot that they would be good based on all of the hoopla from the day and no nappage but I was hopeful.  Within ten minutes of sitting down, Mario whined about his stomach hurting.  He sat on my lap the rest of the dinner intermittently crying or getting mad that we were still sitting there.  Maria turned on us, too, after her pasta and salad arrived and the salad had vinaigrette on it rather than ranch and her pasta was “yucky.”  She broke down.  We got her chicken fingers but by that time, it was too late.  Sarah, Jorge and I conversed to the extent possible and called it a night.  Again, I think we jettisoned Jorge’s desire for kids out another 10 years.

Maria lovin' the pool

The kids and I headed back to the hotel.  Mario was hurting from refusing to go to the bathroom and had diaper rash (his one ailment he is constantly prone to).  Maria begged to go to the pool.  I was hoping that the front desk had some type of diaper creme.  We went down and had no luck.  However, the girl at the front desk offered to go buy some for me.  What a godsend.  She has no clue what a wonderful gesture that was for me.  We watched Maria swim while we waited.  Maria did a good job playing on her own in the water – a good sign for this summer.

We headed to the room to apply the creme, and poor Mario cradled himself in my arms.  We sat there watching tv until we all fell asleep.  Mario awoke at midnight screaming hysterically.  It’s bad enough to be awakened at midnight by a screaming kid but even worse when you are in a hotel and know that people around you are shaking their heads and cussing at you under their breath.  I consoled him to the point where his crying became muffled, and then I made him pee in the toilet.  As I stood behind him trying to keep him quiet and asking him to try to go to the bathroom, he farted.  And that is when the fun began.  Poor moms.  How many of us have a similar story of getting crapped on, literally?!  Rancid, disgusting, putrid – the only words that can begin to describe what I had to clean off of me and the bathroom floor.  An hour later, I climbed into bed with Mario sleeping soundly.  At least he slept the rest of the night. 

Mario with his water wings

Mario woke before Maria so I took advantage of the Cartoon Channel so I could rest my eyes a little longer.  Maria woke at 8:15 am, which is the latest she has ever slept (thanks to that dog walking  the day before).  We went straight to the pool for our last vacation swim – I knew better than to mention breakfast with the hopes that we would swim for a mere half hour and then they’d be too hungry to continue.  The plan failed.  One and a half hours later, I finally got them to go and that was only because a maintenance man came in to check the chlorine and he went along with my act when I asked him if the pool was closing.  I should have slipped him a $20 on my way out. 

Hanging with the pups

We headed back to our room, got changed, and headed out to Aunt Sarah’s for one last jaunt with the crazy pups.  When we arrived, books and papers covered the kitchen table with a cup of coffee and glass of water amidst them.  Joan Didion. The Best of Nonfiction Writing.  The New Yorker magazine.  I admire their passion for writing and reading.  Sarah told me they got up and immediately began reading and writing.  A foreign life to me at this stage of my life, but one that always inspires me to continue to ask questions and express myself and access my goals.  And I have learned that one of my goals at this stage of my life is to enjoy and cherish this time with my kids, and to provide them with experiences that will help them see the world outside of our home and neighborhood.  As hard as these “vacations” can be, I feel exhilerated at the end of them because of the experience of it all. 

Giving Stella one more treat

Mario saying goodbye to Mona

And back to Sarah’s and Jorge’s lives, Maria and Mario interrupted their lives that morning as they bombarded Sarah with a ton of questions about the pups, ran around the apartment with them, and fed them enough treats for a week.  Nonetheless, Sarah and Jorge welcomed the two tornadoes with open arms and wide smiles, and provided them with much love before our departure.  We said our goodbyes with the dogs a’ barkin’ and headed back to Columbus, Ohio.  The West Va. gas station (West Va. is Mama Ionno’s birthplace) greeted us and provided us with Cheetos for Mario, Chex Mix for Maria and CornNuts for me to get us home.  We had a brief layover with Pee-paw at the farm (long enough for Maria and I to take a hike and find deer bones that Maria wants to take to school and for Mario to see the horses). 

Mario passed out

Maria watching Berenstein Bears with her pillow pet

Mario fell asleep within ten minutes of hitting the road to Columbus.  He slept until we were ten minutes from home, which is when Maria knocked off.  We walked in the back door and experienced that mixed feeling of relief in being home and sadness in knowing that vacation was over.  We all sat on the couch and relived the trip with dad.  Later that evening, Maria laid in her bed looking distraught.  “I want to be back in Pittsburgh” she sulked.  And folks laughed when we told them Pittsburgh for Spring Break.

Alone with the Mario-man

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Maria spent the weekend with her cousin, Alana and her Grandma Ionno and Papa Ionno.  Grandma Ionno (Patty) is a powerhouse of a lady – able to take these grandkids for days at a time.  Her energy amazes everyone along with her positive attitude and dedication to family.  She takes Mario for days at a time: a three-year old “spazo” kid who wants to wrestle and fight and play b-ball, and she handles him for five days straight.  Incredible.  She weighs all of 100 pounds wet and still has that cheerleader smile and pep to her from high school.  She has been dealing with the “Bickerson Twins” as she calls Maria and Alana when they are together.  They tend to whine and bicker often when they are together (with me, too) and Patty simply tells them that they will head home if they don’t shape up.  They shape up – because who would want to leave Grandma Ionno’s house? 

Mario ready to play b-ball on his 2nd b-day!

Meanwhile, Jon and I are dealing with only one child.  We recalled when we had only Maria and we would complain about how hard it was and how we wished we had more alone time.  Then Mario came and we thought “man, we had it easy with one – what were we complaining about?”  Mario played basketball a good part of the day.  he woke up this morning begging to play but we made him wait until it got in the 40s.  He went on errands with Jon (got donuts) and then came home to play b-ball.  He played for almost  an hour and a half before Blake, the neighborhood boy (age 6) called from his yard over to Mario “Do you want to play soccer with me?”  At first Mario declined because he wanted to continue playing b-ball with his cool mom but then Blake asked again.  Mario looked at me and chirped “Mom, Blake wants to have a playdate with me!”   His dialogue with Blake was precious “Blake, do you want me to bring my basketball” and “you can come to my house for a playdate, too.”  He walked back home a half hour later with Blake holding his one hand and a chocolate milk in his other. Mario ready to play b-ball on his second b-day!”Mom, I had a fun playdate with Blake. Can he come to our house for a play date sometime?” 

Precious. 

We took a walk later.  Since the stroller has been out of commission, we tried the backpack.  We have not used the backpack in at least four months.  However, as soon as I slipped it on with him snug on my back, I remembered all of the rides we took when he was an infant and a toddler.  His perfectly shaped head resting on the mid of my back as I walked gently throughout the neighborhood so I would not jar him.  Holding his tiny feel in my hands as I walked down the streets with him.  Feeding him raisins as we looked for birds and squirrels.  It all came back to me as soon as I swung him on my back. 

We headed up to the second-hand store to try to find some “basketball pants” for him.  He liked jeans for one day over the last four months – sweats are just where it is for him at this stage of his life.  But all of his sweats are way too short for him (he thinks they look cool though because you can see his socks well).  I told him that we would get him some basketball sweats like the ones the college players wear and that was all it took.  He was game.  We stopped at DQ and got an ice cream cone to eat along the way.  When we got to the second-hand store, Mario helped me find four pairs of b-ball sweats – two with stripes down the side and one with snaps at the bottom.  He also picked out a basketball hat and a new black belt which he promptly clasped around his middle (with sweatpants on!). 

Mario in his backpack

We started home together and I found myself yawning and exhausted.  Mario’s head cold had finally gotten me.  So, I made up a story about an elephant named George who loved to go to the park.  I asked Mario to continue the story and he added that George had a man as a friend names Steve Sign.  A monster came to the park one day and killed George and Steve Sign.  Ok, my turn.  I added Henrietta, the best friend of George, who loved him dearly and cried a river when she found out he died.  I turned it over to Mario.  Mario added the following: 

“The river turned out to have sharks in it.  The sharks found Henrietta and ate her.”

Exasperated with constant death, I added “Henrietta’s parents came and saw the sharks hurting her and…”

I waited to hear Mario say that they got killed, too but instead he said the following:

“And Henrietta’s dad fought with the sharks and Henrietta and her mom became alive.” 

Alright!  No death; fighting still, but no death.  That is a start. 

Maria, Alana and Mario posing at Polaris

We woke up this morning to 35 degrees.  Within five minutes of rubbing my eyes awake, Mario begged to go outside to play b-ball.  I made him eat a fiber bar before we went out (a new bribe – eat something good for breakfast and we’ll play b-ball).  The boy could play b-ball for hours.  We were out there 45 minutes before dad made us come inside because it was so cold.  We traveled up to Polaris Mall at noon to meet Grandma and Grandpa Ionno and Maria and Alana.  They played at the play land for a while.  Alana and Mario ran after each other and tackled each other.  Maria felt left out.  She sulked over in the corner.  I told her to go and play with them but she didn’t feel like it.  My girl – she has a lot of loner in her (is that a Menkedick trait?) so I told her to do her own thing.  She walked around and climbed some animals in a sort of melancholy fashion but with quiet purpose.  After a while, Alana ran up to her and hugged her and that got her in the mood to play again. 

We came home after Polaris and Mario and Alana played while Maria got escorted to Zanesville to go to the farm.  Mario and I headed to the library after Alana left and got some Hulk book and Superman books.  On the way home, I saw his eyes getting heavy.  I knew I was in trouble since it was 4:15 and we had to leave for the hockey game at 5.  By the time we hit the house, he was knocked out cold.  When I take him out of the stroller, he usually always wakes up (when we want him to sleep).  Today, he was limp and out.  I put him on the couch.  Jon and I made noise, Cy barked, but he would not wake up.  At 5 pm, I finally jostled him awake and asked if he wanted to go to the game.  At first he tossed around pissed at the world but then he realized it was the hockey game and he agreed to go.  We got there a little late and it took him a while to open up to the people in the suite but after the first quarter, he came alive (probably from the 3 chocolate chip cookies he devoured).  He acted goofy, ran around, gave hugs, flirted with a “cute girl” and loved the hockey game.  He watched it intently commentating on the players, the refs and the ice.  He loved the experience.  When we left, he asked me when we could go to a basketball game.

Maria and Pee-paw scoping out the farm before the house was built!

We got home and watched his new favorite show: Power Rangers.  He stood up and aped what the actors did in the show.  He reminds me of my little brother when he does that; Jackson used to not only mimic what they did physically but he used to have killer sound effects that he added.  I called Maria to see how she was doing at the farm, and she was being her silly self on the phone – happy to be off of school for Spring Break and with Mama Meg and Pee-paw.

Mini me and Spazo

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Mario running with Maria in the stroller shouting commands!

Maria and Mario agreed to a walk two evenings ago but we got in the stroller and remembered that the front tire burst during our library trip last Sunday when we put Maria on the foot rest of the stroller to make room for her friend and Mario to sit in the stroller seats.  The stroller tire lasted almost a half of a mile before it succumbed to the pressure from above.  When I told the kids the stroller was out of commission, Mario went straight for his bike.  Maria went straight to my arms. 

When that idea was shot down, she begged for the one-person stroller. 

“Maria, why don’t you walk?” 

“Because I am tired, mom, and I haven’t been in this stroller in a long time. It will remind you of when I was just a baby.” 

She is smooth.  She knows that I weep and get mushy about places, pictures, things that take me back to her or her brother being tiny.  I helped Mario with clasping his Spiderman helmet (he still remembers the time that Pee-paw accidentally pinched his skin in the helmet and winces each time I put it on him) and gave him an initial push down the sidewalk.  By that time, I looked behind me and there was “take-charge” Maria who had gotten the stroller off the porch and situated herself in it.  She gives me the sly Maria smile and shouts “Let’s go, Mom! Love you!” 

Mario riskin' it by petting a rat.

When we looked up, Mario was almost to the end of our block.  He has not yet learned to make complete stops at intersections so I yelled for him to stop.  He didn’t.  That is when Maria Grace took charge.  She jumped out of the stroller and darted towards the intersection yelling “Mario Joseph, stop!”  When she caught up with him (after the intersection where he did glance back and forth for a millisecond), she ripped him up. 

“Mario Joseph, you need to listen to your mom and your sissy if you are going to be allowed to ride your bike alone.  You scared us and we do not like that. Next time you do that we are going to stop the ride and go home.”

And there you have it.  My girl taking charge.  The scary thing is that she sounded just like me.  She has listened to me too well. Mario listened to her entire speech and followed it up with a sticking out of his tongue and a taunt (similar to what he does to his mama).  Maria galres at him and scolds “that is inappropriate behavior, Mario.”  Words right from her mama’s mouth.  I intercede between the two but basically reiterate everything mini-me has said to him. 

Maria and her loud voice (like her mama!)

When we arrive at Panera, Mario parks his bike perfectly against the bike stand, asks me to help take off his helmet, and rests it on the handlebar.  He smooths down his hair that got messed up by his helmet, and heads towards the door.  He has to open it for us, which he is able to do after two minutes of extraneous pushing and me slipping my hand up top to give it a nudge (if he had seen me, it would have been chaos!).  When we walk in, he turns to us and flexes his arms muscles.  “I am strong and have lots of muscles!”  Maria gives him a shout out: “Yes, Mario, you are the strongest!” 

After retrieving water and saying hi to a few older guests (Maria asks if I am proud of her for saying hi to them since I tell her how good it makes people feel to see a little girl smile at them and say hi), we head back out for the ride home.  There are two girls sitting outside, and Mario walks by, looks at me, and whispers “Look at those hot girls.”  Heaven help me.  Who teaches him these things?  Maria rolls her eyes at me but then eggs Mario on by whispering “say hi to them, Mario”  Yeah, I think I have a clue on who is his teacher….

The twosome waiting for Spring to come...

Mario mounts his bike and takes off past Jeni’s and Stauf’s reciting “I am cool” the entire way.  Maria follows him closely making sure that he is not getting too far from us.  He stops at the light and both of them look down to see a tiny purple flower blossoming from the crack of the sidewalk.

“Mom” they both chime. 

“What?”

“Look at the beautiful flower.  That is a sign of Spring.” Maria states.

Mario adds: “The sun helped it bloom.” 

“Indeed, it did, Mario.”

Happynomics

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Precious babes ready for their stroller ride.

I woke this morning to a compliment: “You are a pretty flower.” Spoken from the lips of my son as we sat in McDonalds eating Timbits and burritos this chilly morning (ignore our diet, please, it really is a Sunday morning treat – and sometimes Monday and Wednesday and Friday treat…).  He had bitten into a timbit and fixed his stare on me.  I tilted my head and looked perplexed.  That is when he softly spoke the words to me.  I pursed my lips and rubbed my eyes and thanked him for saying something so sweet to his mama.  Maria saw this entire scene and quickly chimed in with “Mom, you are a…a… pretty flower.”  She is usually pretty quick with a quip to follow-up on her brother’s so she must believe that Mario summed it up pretty well to simply repeat his compliment.  I swallowed both of their compliments up and stored them away in that place all of us mothers have – the “I need to remember something positive about these kids” storage chest that we can open when all heck is breaking loose and we feel like we need to escape but cannot.  If we can just take ourselves back to one of those memories, hopefully we can stay sane enough to make it through the breakdown.  Kinda like chocolate….

Maria (Ms. Serious) and Mario (Mr. Jolly) playing Wii.

On our stroller ride home, Mario finally admitted he was cold.  Both kids refuse to wear big coats or hats or gloves even though it is only 38 degrees outside.  I bring their coats and accessories because I know eventually they will request them – or I should say, one will request them.  Mario.  Maria is a cold weather machine; a heater; a polar bear.  She has our warm blood streaming through her and it takes a blizzard to make her slightly chilled.  When we got home, Mario went straight to the Wii for a b-ball game.  Maria and I went back out for a stroll and talked about Mario’s birth, her birth, what kind of car I had growing up, what kind of car she wants when she gets older, and boyfriends (she is so inquisitive about the past – I love it).  

When we got back home, Maria and Mario played Wii together while Jon worked and I cleaned.  They went upstairs after five games and took a bath.  Maria loves it when Mario is in a good mood because he will play Barbies with her.  He still uses his Spiderman figurine but he will act like Spiderman is talking to Barbie, they go on dates, talk about their friends, and so on.  It is hilarious to listen to from behind the door.  They played a good half hour before they started to splash the water around the tub and all over the floor.  We politely screamed at them to get out, and before we knew it, there were two naked children in Maria’s room reciting “we are robots” and giggling hysterically. 

Maria and Mario fashion models

Jon and I continued to work and clean and Maria and Mario played together upstairs.  After another half hour, Maria yelled down asking if we were both ready for a fashion show.  “Sure!” we yelled back to her.  She introduced her and Mario while they waltzed down the stairs and stepped off the landing in a beautiful display of velvet green and plaid.  Mario in a button down shirt and Maria in a dazzling dress.  I screamed like they were teen idols, and asked for their photo and autograph, which Maria loved.  I also asked if I could kiss her cheek and she blushed with excitement.  “You are such a superstar, Ri, thanks for saying hi to me!”  She laughed and waved goodbye and went up to help Mario who realized he had a tear in his pants (causing him to bolt up the steps to avoid being seen by any other fans).

I finished cleaning the cabinet in the kitchen.  While I scrubbed spaghetti sauce off the white paint and listening to M&M laughing upstairs and talked to Jon about our week ahead, I felt a surge of happiness through my bones.  Pure, raw happiness.  Life could have stopped right there at that second – my head swirled with happiness about who I was, people I loved, experiences I had, places I traveled, choices I made.  All in that moment.   

This evening I perused the NY Times and happened by Roger Cohen’s post titled The Happynomics of Life.  England’s prime minister has decided to create a happiness index.  Cohen argues that this idea is not outrageous and could be helpful if used wisely.   He notes that when Western industrialized societies started measuring gross domestic product, the issue for many was survival.  But now that most of us have enough to live on — or far more than enough by the standards of human history — the question may want to turn to: “What’s going on inside our heads?”  Trying to make a shift from financial prosperity to emotional prosperity.  Putting value on things that don’t have price tags: open spaces, clear air, security, release from pressure — things of growing importance but also growing scarce.

The kids playing it up before Jeni's

Cohen thought of some recent moments of happiness in his own life. “One came walking across Regent’s Park, my skin tingling at the first brush of spring. Another came kissing my daughter goodnight as she slept and seeing how peaceful she was. A third came in Cairo seeing the powerful dignity of the Egyptian people coalescing to bring peaceful change.  These moments were linked to nature, to finding time, to feeling the transcendent power of the human spirit. Emotional prosperity is not the next e-mail in a relentless life.”

His piece struck me based on my experience earlier in the day, and stayed with me as I took Maria and Mario and Maria’s friend, Jonera to Jeni’s for ice cream.  They all ran ahead of me laughing at Mario making silly faces at them.  They giggled the entire time at Jeni’s about goofy things – Mario’s dancing, Maria’s kissing frenzy, the puppy at the window waving to us.  We walked home with the crisp cusp of Winter at our side but with birds chirping and people on their porches clearing the way for swings and planters.

The kids enjoying Jeni's

Fresh Air – Finally!

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Maria and Mario enjoying the 50 degree weather

The only good aspect of living through such cold, dreary, snowy, rainy, blustery days is that when a mildly sunny 50 degree day pokes through, it is like nirvana.   I had been trying to convince myself all week not to fall deep into the doldrums but it had not worked especially well.  I went to bed at 9:30 last night because I was tired and irritable and sick of the cold – go away old man winter!   

But then Saturday arrived like a bright pink package waiting for you on Christmas morning and I felt sparks of energy zing throughout my body.  The sun was out, and it was above 40 degrees.  I went for a run around the neighborhood.  I felt like I could go for 20 miles.  When I came home, Maria immediately begged to go on a walk – yes ma’am!  She got her homework sheet (find things outside that engage one of your five senses) and went to wait for me on the porch.  Mario, always imitating his sister, grabbed a pad of paper and pen and followed her outside (on a side note, Mario wore jeans today for the first time in probably 4 months – he had sworn off jeans and only donned sweats for all of winter (can we say George Castanza?!)) 

Enjoying their favorite tree

They walked a few houses up noticing the delicate Spring flowers blooming on the hillsides of the neighbors’ yards.  Mario did not like the white ones because they drooped downwards and looked like they were “dead.” He liked the purple ones standing at attention, sturdy, strong.  Mario is all into muscle lately whether on him (“Feel my muscles, everyone”) or on objects.  Maria reminded me that we needed to buy flower seeds and flowers to plant soon so our yard would look pretty for Spring.  She is a task master.  After looking around the street, she chose a car to describe her senses.  She saw the car, touched the car, smelled the car (she observed if it was turned on she would smell gas) and heard the car start its engine ( I tried for a flower or tree but she wanted a car). 

We headed up the street to Stauf’s for a bagel and cream cheese.  We had not hit Stauf’s together for a long time and it was refreshing to sit in the coffeehouse and relax.  And neither of my children ran around like crazy people, which thrilled me most of all.  Mario sat on my lap and Maria sat in her chair.  Is this what it is like to have well-behaved kids?  Love it. We took off down Grandview Avenue – Maria running ahead and hiding behind signs and Mario trailing behind doing the same.  Luckily, Maria is very good about stopping at every crosswalk but I still make her stop every 20 feet or so.  What is it going to be like when she is older and wants to walk alone with her girlfriends?! 

Mario soaking up the pampering

We made it past the post office, past the waterfall in the flower shop, and to the hair cutting place.  Mario stopped dead in his tracks; ran his hand through his hair, and demanded he get a haircut.  “It has been too long, mom.”  So, we headed inside.  Maria and Mario flipped through magazines (Mario’s was ESPN and Maria’s was Vogue – swear!) and Maria got called up to the chair.  She had decided she would “get a trim.”  However, she didn’t make it two minutes before she started crying about how much it hurt to comb her hair.  It went from a slight sniffle to a full-blown sob and we had to stop the hairstylist.  If there is one thing that Maria hates it is getting her hair combed.  I let her brush her own hair for school because she has such a meltdown if I touch it.  It is one of those battles I choose not to have because it isn’t worth it in comparison to getting dressed, getting lunch together, getting homework done.  She certainly does not do the best with it but I don’t have enough energy to waste fighting this one (although there are times that I just want to style her gorgeous thick hair!). Mario is up to the chair next.  He sits straight up, eyes focused in the mirror, sucker in his mouth, and does not move the entire time the stylist cuts, razors and trims up his hair.  He watches intently in the mirror soaking up the adoration and pampering from the staff.  When finished, he agrees to some gel through his hair.  When we get outside, the wind blows hard.  “Mom, does my hair still look good?”  The boy is destined to be the next drop-dead male model – god help us. 

We head to Giant Eagle next to pick up lawn bags and yogurt with candy on top (Mario’s new obsession).  I am concerned about the walk home because I now have bags of groceries and therefore it is inevitable one will be too tired to walk and want me to carry them.  However, much to my amazement, they run with each other down Grandview Avenue, stopping at the waterfall again and the mailboxes.  They continue to think it is so funny to hide from me behind a parking meter.  

We were so close to home when Mario tripped on a hose; hence, the end of the walk for him.  I carried him home with Maria by my side asking if I was proud of her for walking the entire way. “Maria, you are my amazing, strong, adventurous girl – I am so proud of you.”  She continued to look down the street but I saw a little smile form on her face. 

My rough and tough princess

Thank god for this day – we all needed it to raise our spirits and get us back into life again.  Recharge the batteries.  See the light.  Tomorrow is supposed to be back to 40 degrees and cloudy but we can handle it for a few days now that we have had the gorgeousness and splendor of today.  Besides, daylight savings time is tonight so it will be light until 7 or so every evening – another saving grace to keep us away from those doldrums.

Fun Fair 2011

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M&M at the 2010 fun fest!We went to the annual Family Fun Fest today for the second year in a row (the picture to the left is of M&M after getting their face painted like cats last year; despite their looks, they did have a blast!). 

Once again, I left more exhausted than I am after a ten-mile run.  The middle school gym is filled with frantic kids trying to get to every game and activity in the place.  There was the annual toilet paper throw with boarded up toilet seats as the target; the coconut roll; the duck pond; and the basketball free-throw zone. 

The b-ball zone was Mario’s dream come true.  He would not leave it.  Luckily, the male volunteer in charge of that game took a liking to little Mario and let him take a few shots in between other contestants taking their shots.   He stayed in that one area even though there was a bouncey house, a football toss and the almighty toilet paper toss nearby.  Maria and I were cracking up. 

Maria did not surprise me with her actions at the fair.  She is like clockwork.  She walked in and immediately bolted over to the sand art (putting colored sand in a plastic figurine necklace).  Next, she moved to the painting exercise but it had a line so she quickly moved on (she has her mother’s patience).  She headed over to the cupcake and cookie table and checked out the goods.  I had my eye on her knowing what was to come. 

Mario at the fun fair with the green octopus he chose!

“Mom, can I get two snacks; I am so hungry.” Of course I give in justifying that it is a festival after all.  She chooses the purple cupcake and iced cookie.  Mario nabs a brownie, and heads back to the b-ball game.  Maria shuffles to and from a few games for about ten minutes, and then asks for another snack.  “No way, you have to wait a little longer.  We’ll get a hot dog in a bit.”  She finds a friend soon thereafter and they go in the bounce house together and run around the gym.   I am finally able to drag Mario from the b-ball game by having the volunteer pretend that they are closing up the game up for the day.  He helps me put away the balls and holds off the other kids until Mario and I are out of the door.  God love him.

We found the face-painting area on our way out.  Maria chose an ice cream cone and Mario chose an octopus.  Mario spent five minutes after the painting admiring his octopus in the little mirror they gave him.  Maria told me she got a chocolate ice cream cone just for me, and then added “Now, can we get a hot dog or a treat?”  She knows how to reel me in…

We went to the food table and they were sold out of hot dogs.  Maria glared at me with tears forming quickly and shouted “It is all your fault – we should have come over here when I first asked, mom!”  I attributed the outburst to half exhaustion and half a longing for festival food.  As I stood there trying to help Mario put on his shoe, she spotted the cupcake table.  Her anger at me soon ceased.  “Mom, may I please get one more snack since they don’t have a hot dog?” Sweet as can be (she really does know how to work it).  I bought her a small cookie.  Mario refused any more sweets because “they have a lot of sugar which won’t make me grow.”  Jon and I have been telling him this so that he will eat more veggies and fruits and every once in a while it works.  Rather than worry about food, Mario beamed at the sweat that he had built up from playing basketball.  “I look like you mom after you come home from a run!” 

Maria with her ice cream painting.

 We strolled home in the light drizzle without saying a word – the excitement of the fun fair blowing us away for a second year in a row.

A much needed get-away

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Looking out to the waves.

Jon and I took off for Cancun on Wednesday a couple of weeks ago.  It was a nail-biter prior to Wednesday morning at 5:30 am when we took off for the airport.  I got a leg infection on Sunday afternoon – thought it may be a hernia since my left thigh and groin were swollen and red.  I went to the ER on Sunday morning to ensure it was not a hernia and discovered it was an infection.  Luckily, antibiotics kicked in quickly and I felt better by Tuesday morning.  Then it was Jon’s turn to give us a scare.  He came home on Tuesday night feeling nasty with a headache, stomach ache and slight fever.  He never got his flu shot this year, and he felt like it was the flu coming on strong.  We packed our bags up on Tuesday night but in the back of both of our heads we were thinking that the trip would likely be cancelled. 

Jon and I braving the zip-line - we were pros!

Wednesday morning came and Jon got up from the bed to get his alarm at 4:45 am.  He still felt achey and his stomach hurt but no fever.  It was quite the dilemma at that time of the morning – my body had no desire to get out of bed and the fatigue overwhelmed the senses, which were screaming to get out of the 9 degree weather to sunny Cancun!  Jon and I waited until the last-minute to decide to go; called Maggie to come over and get Maria to school, and headed out to the airport.  Seven hours later we were in 79 degree weather staring out at the ocean. 

We had a marvelous time between playing in the ocean, zip-lining through the “jungle” , driving ATVs through dirt paths and ankle-high puddles (got my brand new gym-shoes dirty though – ugh!), and swimming in a cavernous pool of fresh water.  The ocean was our favorite – we both love diving into the waves and getting thrown around.  We agreed that Spring Break should be at the beach if it is warm enough.  Meanwhile, the kiddies were with our beloved parents. 

Maria enjoying a tractor ride (altough her face says differently!)

Maria stayed with her Pee-paw and Mama Meg.  She got treated to her Uncle Jack’s concert on Friday night and the farm on Saturday and Sunday.  She went on two hikes with her Pee-paw, both lasting over two hours.  That kills me!  I ask her to walk to school a half mile away and she whines the entire way.  Something about that gorgeous farm….  It helped that there was ice coating the creek – Maria loves cracking it.  Mama Meg played barbies with her (what a saint!) and cooked up some yummy food.  Meg is the only relative I know that actually vetoes certain barbies going out to the farm!  It seems that she refuses all the sluts and bimbos so I gotta give her a shout out – way to keep Ri real!  Mario stayed with Grandma Ionno and Papa Ionno.   They spoiled him like mad (as they always do) and he was in heaven.  It is his second home up there.  He sat on Papa Ionno’s lap one night and ate mini Nutter Butters while they watched basketball.  Mama Ionno cooks him whatever he wants, scratches his back softly (Mario scolds me everytime he comes home from Mama

Mario and his Grandma Ionno

Ionno’s house that I don’t scratch his back as good as Mama Ionno!), rocks him to sleep, and lets him wrestle her.  He is the king of the roost in that house, for sure. 

I treated Maria and Mario to COSI when we returned from Cancun.  We spent 6 hours at that place!  They saw geckos, entered a submarine, played in the kids area, changed the weather, and got shocked by electricity (supervised by a real scientist – not a torture device for being bad!).  I was pooped, as always, when I got home with them but the kind of pooped that intertwines accomplishment with exhaustion, gulping down life with drop-dead fatigue.

The Tooth Fairy is Coming Tonight….

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Maria lost her tooth!  Maria lost her tooth!

Maria showing that missing tooth!

There was much excitement in the house this afternoon when my first-born, my little girl, lost her bottom center tooth.  It only started wiggling and jiggling yesterday.  I received a text at work from our babysitter informing me that Maria had a loose tooth.  Maria had told me this in the past but when I went to wiggle the tooth, it was never loose.  The fact that our babysitter had informed me of the loose tooth, however, made me believe that this one was not a joke.  I called the house and Maria screamed in the phone, “my tooth is loose, mom!”  I screamed with her and told her I could not wait to wiggle it with her. 

We met down at Mario’s school to pick him up, and I got to see it.  Precious little tooth standing at half mast with its buddies.  It freaked me out, quite frankly.  Watching her wiggle it with her tongue or her hand made me cringe.  We went to Chipotle for dinner and she had quite a time digging into her soft taco.  She was concerned about her tooth breaking off in the taco.  However, like the good eater she is, she refused to let her taco go to waste and she somehow found the courage to eat it. 

Maria giving me that toothless smile!

We woke up this morning and it was much looser.  For some reason I had in my head that it took weeks and weeks for my teeth to fall out when they first became loose (or it could merely be that I am unbelievably inpatient so 4 hours seemed like a week).  She continued to feel it every five minutes until around 11:30 am, while sitting at my computer and watching Barbie.com “Fashionistas”, she  shrieked “It’s out, Mom!”  I came running into the dining room from the kitchen, Mario blasted into the dining room from the living room, and we stood in awe at this little white tooth sitting in the palm of a 5 and a half-year old hand. 

We took the obligatory pictures, talked about the Tooth Fairy, and called around to our family.  We even visited Doris and Kim up the street to show the missing tooth off to them.  The simple joys of life.  Maria keeps telling Mario and I how strange it feels to not have a tooth when she is talking or eating (we know that she secretly loves to simply talk about this new adventure of losing a tooth).  Mario keeps responding to us that he is going to lose his tooth soon because he is “almost five.”  

Tonight, Maria wrapped her tooth in a ziplock bag to keep it from getting lost by the Tooth Fairy.  Now, we just need to see if the Tooth Fairy makes it and what she brings….  Gotta go!

Family Ritual

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The Adventure Team with the addition of M&M!

Last night, I read a book that included a section about the importance of family rites and rituals.  The author asked the question “why do we need rites and rituals?” and answered it with the following: “Because we fall into forgetfulness.  The speed Demon captures our souls. We are too busy…. The demands of modern life are so many that we easily become distracted and neglect to pause and consider what is really important.” 

When I read this passage last night, I immediately thought about some of the past rituals that I share with my family.  My dad, stepmom, brother and sister and I used to take summer vacations to areas where we could hike, find rocks, swim and camp.  It was an outdoor adventure and not surprisingly, we dubbed ourselves “The Adventure Team.”  I look back on those trips with such fond memories (even though for a few of my teenage years, I remember dreading the thought of leaving my friends and the city to go to the lonesome woods!) and an appreciation for Dad and Meg’s persistence in making such vacations happen.  A high appreciation now that I have kids and know the effort and time necessary to prepare for such events and the lack of “leisure” that can often occur on such vacations!  

Mario enjoying his donuts!

Today, Maria, Mario, Jon, and I woke up to a balmy 32 degrees outside and the sight of a cardinal and robin perched in a bare magnolia tree in the back yard.  We looked out the back door at the two birds debating which one was a male and female; the babies they may have in the Spring; and the magnificent color of red the cardinal wore against the ashen tree.  After the birds flew away, we headed back into the living room, and decided that it was warm enough to take a stroller ride to the donut shop.  It has been a while since we did this on a Sunday morning.  The kids bundled up with their nighties under their clothes, and we jumped in the stroller for a wintry, snowy ride to Tim Horton’s.  

During the ride, Maria noticed how beautiful the morning was with the sun shining (the first time in days!) and the snow glistening.  Mario noticed the huge nests that were still present in the bare trees. Ahh, it is these mornings that I breathe in my children and my life and everything beams around me….

Maria and her sultry pose at the donut shoppe.

Once at Tim Horton’s, we claimed our regular seats near the window and ate our donuts and bagel.  We talked about Mama Ionno’s house and what they would play there when they went for dinner.  We talked about Daisies and how many cookies Maria has sold to family.  We talked about summer and how great it will be to stroll to the donut shop in a t-shirt and shorts!  After the donuts, Maria begged to go to the river to find rocks.  I was not sure Mario would agree because he gets so cold even wrapped up in three layers but he ended up being game.  It was an adventure getting there since the bike path was still covered in snow.  I got my arm workout in for the week!   

Maria found her stash of cool rocks, as always.  The girl has an eye for unique rocks.  She found one with fossils and another shiny onyx one.  Mario threw small, medium and large rocks into the water listening for the different sounds they produced upon impact.  We found an “iceberg” jutting off the edge of the bank and took turns throwing rocks on it and watching the ice break off and float down the river.  I told them that if anyone ever told them that they were not strong, they could tell them that they destroyed an iceberg!  They liked that. 

Maria and Mario at the river

We headed back to the house about a half hour later.  I trudged back through the snow along the path and took a deep sigh upon seeing the road.  We headed up Grandview Avenue taking in the immense sunlight and “warm” temperatures.  While I pushed the kids up the hill, I thought about family rituals and it dawned on me that going to the river is our family ritual.  Spending the morning at the river engaging in the simple acts of gathering rocks and making huge splashes in the water.  It is strange to think about creating new rituals for my children; my focus in the past has always been on retaining the rituals from my childhood – Christmas dinners at Grandmas’ houses; Easter egg hunts at Grandma’s house; birthday parties with big sheet cakes.  

But now I found myself creating a new ritual with Maria and Mario that, although right in line with the activites of my childhood summer vacations. was different and special to us.  And best of all, the trips allowed all of us to “pause and consider what is really important.”