Trudging through with love

I finally walk among the living today. It has been three weeks of coughing, fevers, headaches, stomachaches, nausea, fatigue, and grouchiness and I am so ready for my world to revert back to healthy bodies and laughter and positive spirits!
First, Mario got sick before Thanksgiving. If I don’t get the sickness he carries, I still get run down because I end up staying up with him half the night. Even if he’s not calling out for me, I lay awake because I can’t stand to hear him coughing. It was that hoarse, gagging cough he had and it sent chills up my spine to hear him. I’d go into his room and make him blow his nose and give him water and then rub his back to settle him down. I’d reach a time when he wasn’t hacking and think “yes, he’s asleep and well.” Then I’d climb back into bed and within 30 seconds he’d start hacking again. I’d toss and turn as Jon snored away beside me. How can he sleep so soundly?! I’d sit in bed both worried about Mario and pissed at Jon for being able to sleep (to give Jon credit, as soon as I nudged him and told him to get Mario water, he would). The mother gene kicks in full throttle when our babies are sick. I can’t rest peacefully unless they are. And when I don’t get 7 hours of sleep, I go downhill. And so I did. The day after Thanksgiving, I began to feel crappy. And just when I began to feel a bit better, Rocco got sick. He had the same hoarse cough as Mario but with one difference. He had gotten into the bag of turkey bones. So, at 2 am when he was wrenching in his crate, and Jon was snoring away, I awoke. Those mama genes in high alert even for my non-human baby. Poor pup had thrown up everywhere and continuously gagged. I found no turkey bones in his puke (what a life) so became increasingly concerned that one was stuck in his throat. Jon came down and we agreed I should take him to the ER (I’m better at hospitals is Jon’s reasoning for not going). So at 3:15 am, me and my pup drove to OSU Vet Hospital. At least it wasn’t too busy. Lots of dollars later, they diagnosed him with kennel cough and pneumonia and told me I could keep him at the hospital for a boat load of money or take him home and watch over him all day. By this time (7:30 am), I was exhausted, sick, and distressed. I decided if stay home to rest and watch over Rocco. But Monday was the day that all hell broke out at work and I was on phone calls all morning and afternoon. As I left to go to Ri’s geography bee, Rocco threw up blood. Are you kidding?!
So, I ran to her bee, watched her kill it, and then ran home to take Rocco back to OSU. Another chunk of cash later, they confirmed no turkey bone. Still just the kennel cough and pneumonia. The blood must have been from all the coughing. I got a handful of different meds and headed home at 8:30 pm. Jon could see how tired I was and told me to go to bed with the kids. He stayed downstairs with Rocco. I fell asleep before the kids and slept until 4:30 am when Rocco came upstairs to heave beside my pillow. At least I got 7 hours of sleep. It’s all I needed to feel somewhat revived and at least be able to make it through most of the day before wanting to crash.
But then Ri got sick. She was at a concert at Mershon Auditorium when I got the text from a mom friend. She reported she was hot and pale and miserable. Ugh.
Jon was in a meeting so didn’t answer my call. I had a meeting at 1 that I couldn’t miss and it was 11:30. I called the doctor and got her in at 12:15. Tried Jon again.
Voicemail.
I scooped up my coat and keys and drove to Mershon. My girlfriend brought her outside and she laid in the back moaning about her head.
Jon called.
He would meet me at the doctor so I could get back for my 1 pm meeting. This constant juggling and meeting and exchanging and dropping off is the sign of a true partnership and of true love. Jon and I may not see rainbows and stars every time we look into each others’ eyes but we do see deep devotion and love. We see perseverance and dedication and mutual struggle and joy. I watched him and Ri talking as I left the doctor’s office and felt such affection for him. I also wanted to pass out from exhaustion.
Ri was sick all weekend and therefore, Jon and I and the kids just chilled around the house all day Saturday and Sunday playing board games and watching football. It was wonderful and much needed for the body and mind.
Here’s to this upcoming holiday season being free of bacteria and viruses and full of the warmth and love that, thankfully, so beautifully fills our home and keeps us among the living – even when we are completely exhausted.

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My caretaker

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I took Rocco for a run yesterday morning. Our regular Sunday trot together. The kids will allow me to do that on Sundays but no additional running or working out because it is our day to chill together. I got a call as I approached home. Ri chirped “when will you be home mom?”
I told her I was five minutes away and she hung up the phone on me. I came home to the spread pictured above.
“Mom, I know how you like to eat healthy so I made you eggs and your toast you love with just a little jelly and pineapple and yogurt. And guess what I put in your coffee?!”
Yep, she added my milk and cinnamon and sugar just the way I like it.” She is proving to be quite the caretaker, and gives me hope for when I’m 95 and finally in need of assistance.
In furtherance of her care taking duties, she also got on me this morning because she came downstairs and found an empty ice cream container that had not been opened when she went to bed last night.
“Mom! This is wrong! You ate the entire container of ice cream?!”
What could I say? I fessed up to her and admitted I did it.
“That is ridiculous,” she responded throwing the container away.
Who takes care of who in this family?! (I did make her dinner last night, though – so BAM!).
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Wing kids

The kids have returned from a weekend with Grandma Ionno. At age 75, this lady takes her 4 grand kids for more than 48 hours and complains not one bit. God love her – more than I can say about me after 24 entire hours.
We took Grandma to Matt the Miller’s for brunch. All Mario likes these days are ritz crackers and chicken legs. Yea, don’t ask me. He is an enigma. He ate an entire sleeve of crackers when he stepped into the house; and when we went to brunch he asked for chicken legs. They had chicken leg wings, thank goodness, and Mario was pleased. Ri couldn’t pass up the wings either because the waiter confirmed they had ranch dressing to which she could dip her wings. That girl knows how to live.

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Mario isn’t quite as seasoned as Ri on the wing front. He doesn’t dip them in anything and only ate two before he was full (may have had to do a bit with the sleeve of Ritz crackers…).
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Wings have never tempted me and never will. They look and feel gross. I stuck with a turkey club and sweet potato fries – yum. But as always, the best part of the meal was the dessert – Greater’s buckeye blitz and chocolate chip ice cream. If only I could live on that for every meal. The kids have inherited my love for Greater’s as well taking down scoops of chocolate chip with me. Needless to say, I can’t take a picture of us all post-feast because we are sprawled out on the couch with our pants’ buttons undone. Happy post T-Day!>

Thanksgiving 2014

And so another Thanksgiving holiday has passed. We hosted the Heile clan this year so it was a raucous good time with Aunt Julie and I taking turns lifting each other off the ground in wild embraces and the cousins ribbin’ each other over any sort of thing.
Ri was wonderful helping me with the centerpiece and place holders. We spent two days making turkeys for each guest. Maria designed them after the one I tried to design looked like a buckeye nut glued on a circle. I cut out the body and head and beak and gizzard and feathers, and Ri wrote on each body: “We are grateful for NAME because…”. She wrote each family member’s name creatively and then wrote two adjectives on each of the feathers of the turkey to describe the person. She even got her thesaurus out to come up with unique words. Precious girl.

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Poor Mario sat in the family room watching tv the entire time because he was sick as a dog. He sported a nasty virus that reared it’s ugly head through a non-stop cough for nearly seven days. He was up all night coughing and I swore in my sleep-deprived state that he had to have pneumonia. But two Urgent Care trips later, it was confirmed to simply be a virus. I was so glad to see some life in him on Wednesday morning. He was able to crank out five games of Crazy Eights with me and win everyone.
We woke early on Thanksgiving Day – Jon to prep the turkey and me to take Rocco on a long run to tire him out. When I got home, the kids and I played some more Crazy Eights and they drew cards for the Markles telling them how grateful they were for them in their lives. But the thought of getting out of their pjs to deliver their cards was too much for them so we saved the cards for a post-Thanksgiving present. Mario played on his iPad while Ri waited anxiously for the guests to arrive. Finally, Grandma Lolo arrived. She and I tried to figure out how to make the stuffing and gravy (I get more rudimentary cooking skills honestly; but she gave me so many other talents). Ri quizzed Papa Rod on geography. Then others began to arrive. Ri became the official greeter and coat taker thanks to Laura designating her. These cousins of mine have quite the influence on Maria Grace. She listens to their every word and watches their every move. She grew up with these gals and surely gets all of her sassiness from them.
I loved the hustle and bustle in the house; the laughter; the poking; the frivolity. I grew up with this craziness and I’m glad to see that none of us have settled down. Heck, look at us former Perkins’ waitresses posing for the camera – we still got it.
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While Jon was outside grilling a mean turkey, Julie, my mom and I were trying to brew up some equally mean gravy. You would think mixing broth, flour and water would not be so scary, but again, you are talking to three women that have never made it. But ta-da! We killed it!
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Everyone brought lots of sides – broccoli casserole, sweet potatoes, cranberries, green bean casserole, rolls, fruit salad, and mashed potatoes. The cousins got caught up on the latest in their lives while Ri and Mario sabotaged the boy cousins. Sweet Konnor and Stewart let the kids wrestle them and show them every room in the house. Cy played football with Mario in the freezing cold. Mag and Liz and Tiff and Laura grilled Ri about school. The uncles watched some football and the aunts chatted around the kitchen. Kinda traditional setting for T-Day but I’d have it no other way. This crazy bunch has been with me since I was a little pea pod and being able to give them thanks and break bread with them on this day made me giddy happy.
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Laura gave a lovely prayer before our meal and we were off to the races. Jon’s turkey was to die for – moist and honey-basted. The sides were yummy. The wine was rich. The company superb. And dinner was over in 25 minutes!
All the aunts got to washing the dishes within seconds of the end of the first person finishing their plate – true Grandma Heile style! We broke open the Frisch’s pecan and pumpkin pies and Rice Krispy treats and dove in without hesitation. In sticking with Columbus Thanksgiving tradition, I announced a walk after we gorged ourselves. A few brave souls decided to come with me, including Ms. Grace and Ri. Grace got the delight of climbing a tree!
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When we arrived home, I got a few more minutes with my Heile clan before they started to hit the road. But Susie and I did manage to wrangle the clan for a family photo before departures began. We started with the normal sweet photo…
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But then I got my goofy pose one.
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And then they were gone leaving behind two dozen deviled eggs (we forgot to put them out at dinner much to Jon’s glee), a pecan pie and another year of wonderful memories.
But before we knew it, we had more visitors. Grandma Meg and Peepaw arrived from their Thanksgiving in Cincy. Grandma Meg dropped off Peepaw for a sleepover since he left for Oaxaca on Friday morning to take an intense Spanish course and see Elena. Lucky dog.
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We ended the night with a long game of Quirkle (Ri beat us all as usual) and a few leftovers (including two pieces of sheetcake, yes sheetcake, a new Thanksgiving tradition started by Aunt Julie in honor of my sweet tooth).
I went to bed completely whooped but so grateful for having such an amazing clan to call family.
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Rejoice

With the freezing cold temperatures this past week, it was all you could do to run to your car, run inside, run back to your car and head home. I managed to take Rocco for daily walks but did not fathom asking the kids to come with me. He loves the weather and the snow.
I could not believe the three inches of snow on the ground when I woke up this past week. I was all irritated because I couldn’t go for a run. Those morning runs get my endorphins pumping and when I don’t get to start my day with them, it’s always tough revving up my energy.
I moseyed downstairs and made the kids breakfast. Ri had made her lunch and was ready to go with a ham and cheese and ketchup sandwich in hand. She might as well be in college. I kissed her goodbye and reluctantly went back upstairs to get ready for work. I yelled for Mario to put his shoes on. I heard nothing. After getting ready, I briskly walked down the stairs ready to scold Mario for not listening. Instead I heard a joyful scream.
“Mom, look at this!”
I walked out the back door and Mario was building a snowman.

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The night was full of wrestling and slamming and playfully punching. Oh, and that trophy-thing. Mario loves getting him a trophy.
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“I’m only 7, mom, and I have three trophies. I’m going to have so many by high school.” That’s our competitor.
Meanwhile, Ri came home from school to inform me that she was 1 of 4 fourth graders who made it to the school geography bee! The entire class took a test and the four top scorers get to move on to the school bee. The winners of the school bee go to the state bee and then the national bee. It’s sponsored by National Geographic. The questions are not easy either. It’s not like “what’s the capital of Ohio.” It’s like “in what country would you find a large number of Siberian tigers.” I was so excited for her. She was the only girl out of the four. That is my girl!
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How the heck Jon and I managed to have such warm, smart, hilarious children, I do not know. But I rejoice over their presence in our lives every day I wake up. ;

I could handle five

There are times when I wish Jon and I would have kept making children. After all, our kids are quite gorgeous…!

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And wouldn’t it be great to have five kids running around the house, and huge holiday celebrations, and a security net when Jon and I got older – if two or three of them refuse to take care of us at least the other two or three will….
But then reality hits as it did Wednesday night. I agreed to have the neighbors’ three kids over for dinner. So there’s my five kid wish. Within 40 minutes, I was thanking Jon for his adamant refusal to have more children. Just feeding them was a task. I’d need two jobs to pay for the food. I made macaroni-n-cheese in a giant pot and felt like I was a cook in the army, or back in college after a night of partying.
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But then there they all sat – so sweet – like little toy soldiers eating their meals and laughing at Mario’s silly faces. Ok, I could handle five.
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But it wasn’t two minutes after the macaroni dinner that I heard crashing in the family room, and then wails of pain. Someone was hurt. Yelling ensued. While I cleaned up the hurt kid, the others continued to scream at one another. My kids always stand up for one another and the neighbors’ kids stand up for one another so it’s like the Hatfields and McCoys. Then Rocco entered the mix barking like a mad dog because of the commotion and I was ready to head to the attic and jump off the roof.
I needed a plan. What would calm them down? Drawing. No, too boring. Playing a game? No, to much potential for a fight.
How about acorn crafts?
We’ve had a bowl of acorns for a month thinking we’d color them and put glue inside to watch them turn into “gems” but we still hadn’t done it. Well, that did it. The girls and Pax engaged in the activity while Mario and Quinn played Wii. Then Mario and Quinn and Pax did it while the girls played Wii.
Score.
Quiet and art in the house.
I could handle five. Easily.
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Dreaming of first

Mario is a competitor. He wants to win. Always has. His grade school, Robert Louis Stevenson (RLS) is hosting a Yearbook contest. Kids from kindergarten through third grade are able to draw a picture and enter it into a contest to try to win the prize – having their picture grace the front cover of the 2014-15 yearbook.
Now, if this was the extent of the prize, he would likely have blown off the contest. But I believe you also win $25 (I told him this without verifying so $25 may be coming out of my pocket). Any contest where money is the prize automatically sucks Mario in.
He sat at the table and thought about what to draw. He wanted silence. He looked up Bobcat images on the computer (the school mascot). He began to draw. Frustration set in. Then muffled yells. Then tears. He gets so upset with himself when he doesn’t do something exactly as he sees it being done. He’s gotten a lot better at calming himself down and I find if I just talk in a soft voice to him, he starts to mellow. I had to do this a lot last night. He went to bed with half of the drawing done. I told him I was proud of him for trying his best. He told me he wanted to win the contest. I rubbed his head and told him to have sweet dreams.
I got up early this morning and slowly walked down the hall towards the steps to go for a run.
“Mom?”
“Yeah, dude-man. What’s up?”
“Kiki is really good at drawing. I think she’s gonna win the contest.”
Seriously? He’s thinking about this when he first gets up? A sign of perseverance and determination or obsession with winning?! I told him that all he could do was give his all and just let things fall as they may.
When I got home tonight, he finished his drawing.

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Not without some tears and screams. At one point, I was helping Ri with her multiplication exercise and I heard a muffled cry. I walked in the kitchen and he showed me where he drew with pen on his paper. He had tried to draw a bobcat and he did not like it.
“I can’t believe I used pen!”
“It’s ok, we can use white-out.” A glimmer of hope came over his face.
“I used it all”, shouted Maria from the other room. Mario plopped his head into his hands.
“We will buy some after we vote, dude-man. Why don’t you practice drawing the bobcat on another sheet and then you can feel comfortable drawing it on your paper.”
He drew an amazing bobcat on a separate sheet of paper. Then I had a great idea, which I usually never have when it comes to art. We cut out his bobcat and taped it over the one he messed up so that it almost looked 3-D. He loved it, and smiled as he stared at the finished product.
A win no matter what. Now we have to talk about winning … and possibly losing – gracefully. That could be a little tougher than the bobcat art.
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Blessed

There are days I feel so incredibly blessed to have my children in my life. And days, well, I really can’t fathom why I have been cursed with my hellions.
Yesterday was a day of blessing.
Jon and Mario headed out early for the Bengals game in Cincy. They went with one of Mario’s football team mates and his dad. Jon was excited to take him to his first pro game, and Mario was excited to hang with his dad all day.

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We saw the boys off and then we headed around the streets of Grandview – Ri on her bike and me on my feet – to try to find a friend’s blue parrot who had escaped during the night out an open bedroom window.
We yelled “NoDo” throughout the neighborhood streets and squinted up at the old regal oaks trying to spot the bird among the colorful leaves. The baby blue of the sky contrasting with the deep brown branches and primary colored leaves left me in awe. I stopped Ri on her bike and pointed upwards.
“Isn’t it gorgeous?”
“NoDo!” She yelled for the twentieth time. Give this girl a task involving helping someone, and she is on it.
We thought we heard the parrot on a few occasions. We’d stop in our tracks. Ri would quietly dismount from her bike. We’d walk under the tree where the noises were heard and wait. We saw a blue jay, a chickadee, a bright red robin, but no parrot. We walked past the friend’s house and saw the empty bird cage on the porch – metal door swung open – food lying all around in a valiant effort to entice the lost bird back to its home.
We sighed.
Ri had soccer at 12:45 and Mama Meg and Peepaw were coming to watch so we had to hurry home to get Rocco for our Stauf’s trip. I love Stauf’s trips with my girl. Always laughter and darling comments. I told her to get her bike while I got Rocco and meet me out front. When I walked out the door, she was standing on the step with no bike.
“Whatcha doing?”
“I thought I’d walk with you, mom.”
I pretended to faint.
This girl does not like to walk anywhere. She will get on her scooter or her bike even if we are going around the block (she later told me that she wanted to make my day do she sucked up the walk).
We held hands as we walked up the street. I talked for Rocco half the time because she thinks it’s hilarious. She kept me entertained by adding her two cents.
She wanted to order our food and my coffee. She even brought me out a side of milk to add to my coffee and some cinnamon to sprinkle on too. She is a doll baby girl.
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Rocco loves her to death, too because she gives him pieces of her bagel. He pushes his wet nose against her thigh and licks her hand constantly until he gets another nibble. Spoiled completely.
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She wanted to hold Rocco’s leash on the way home. Don’t you know he stayed by her side and never pulled her once? She’s got him wrapped around her cream cheese finger.
Grandma Meg and Peepaw were at the house when we got home and we piled in the car to take Ri to her soccer game. They got to see my girl running the field and me screaming commands and encouragement to Ri and her team the entire game. I’m born to coach.
Afterwards, we went to Jason’s Deli for some lunch and free soft serve. Ri got her meatballa sub, which was yummy. Peepaw got two rounds of chocolate soft serve and that affirmed my close relation to him. We can’t resist our chocolate.
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We worked on homework after Mama Meg and Peepaw left. That was even enjoyable as we worked on definitions together. Then we took Henley to Giant Eagle to grocery shop and get a gelato. Those two are hilarious together.
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We ended the evening playing States of America and drinking hot chocolate. The boys sauntered in at 8 pm after having an awesome time at the Bengals game. Mario scored a football player’s glove as he and Jon took a picture after the game. That kid is just plain lucky. He gave Jon a huge hug before bed and told him sweetly “I love you dad!” I tucked Ri in and she gave me a hug I could not escape. She, too, whispered that she loved me. I held on tight around her torso and whispered “I love you too, doll baby” right in her precious ear.
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Another Fall weekend

Another gorgeous Fall weekend. I can’t keep myself indoors – the pup is well-exercised these days.
Saturday was a bit rainy in the afternoon but I had errands to run anyway. I dropped Ri off at her birthday party way out in Canal Winchester (anywhere not within five miles of the house is far away to me). Ri took a very excited Alana to the party, too. Lots of gymnastics and lots of snacks.

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I bought a huge flower pot while I waited on the girls to plant my elephant ear plant in this winter. I think I got one that is way too big because it is drooping big time and looks close to death after only one day. I couldn’t get a green thumb if some planted it in green dye. I am pathetic when it comes to tending to plants.
I picked up Ri and Alana and took them to Alana’s house to spend another night with Grandma Ionno. Thank god for that woman – gave me and Jon a bit of alone time this weekend. We treated ourselves to lobster and crab dip at the Fish Market. It’s been a while and we needed it. Don’t we look relaxed and happy?!
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I went and saw the Judge starring Robert Downey Jr. and Robert Duvall. That movie could have been the dumbest movie on Earth and it still would have been worthwhile to see because of Robert Downy, Jr. Lordy, Lordy. But it ended up being a pretty good movie, absent him. And I cried my eyes out through the ending credits, on my way home and for 20 minutes at home. That’s what movies about family and perseverance and loss do to me. But Milk Duds and popcorn made it better.
My Sunday could not have been more joyous. I woke up to a four mile run while listening to NPR and then came home to take Rocco on a six mile run through the woods and around some of the Columbus Marathon route. The woods were magical with the multi-colored leaves strewn everywhere and the light streaming in through the branches of the trees. Hallelujah.
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I arrived home to my man trimming the bushes and I grabbed my rake to help in the yard. Strangely, I love doing yard work together.
The kids arrived home at 11 in time for Patty to hit church. I bundled them up and we headed up to First Avenue to watch the Marathon. The music blared and the runners sweated it out. I loved the vibe. The kids loved the face painting and ballon maker. Mario got his sword, of course. The rest of them got crazy hats. And they all got face paint – Ri went with an OSU theme and Mario went with a tiger. Alana got a cheetah and Gio got a scary skeleton.
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After 45 minutes playing around at those stations, we finally arrived at Stauf’s for a much-needed coffee. Mario had a dollar on him and asked me how much a chocolate chip scone cost. I knew what he wanted to do – treat me to a scone. He knows how much I love them. I told him I thought they were $1 and then motioned to the cashier that I’d pay for the rest. He ordered a scone. She bagged it up and gave it to him. He tapped me as I made my coffee and handed me the bag.
“I got this for you, mom.”
I loved all over him and told him what a sweet son he was and he ate all my words up. He loves being generous as long as the person acknowledges his generosity fully…!
We sat down at a table and played chess. He wanted to teach me all he has learned from his chess club at school. The girls played War and Gio played Dominoes.
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Patty met us at Stauf’s and we all walked home while cheering on the last of the runners (Mario’s take on the last runners: “they need to work harder so they aren’t last.”). Patty resolved to doing the Marathon next year so I’m doing the same (if I will ever let my leg heal).
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We went to Ri’s soccer game and I was loud and cheering her on as usual. I get so excited and can’t keep quiet. I was born to coach, I think.
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After the game, we finished up the yard and sat down to a family meal of chicken and twice baked potatoes (Patty is the queen of those babies!).
We ended the night with an epic jump in the leaf pile created throughout the day. Sophie and Pax joined in the fun.
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One more walk for Rocco, a bed time story about Danny the Diamondback, and a Klondlike bar, and the night was over. Goodnight.
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Give me the Ribs!

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Pure joy on Maria’s face. Ya know why? Three words…
Baby back ribs.
The girl is her father’s child. She adores ribs. They’ve never enticed me but Jon loves them.
We went down to Barley’s for kids eat free night with the Markle clan. I knew I’d have trouble getting Ri to eat off the kids menu – she’s been trying for those adult meals for the last few months. And Barley’s has nothing much she likes on the kids menu. That fact combined with the fact that Barley’s has ribs led to her non-stop pleading to me.
“Why don’t you get pulled chicken? That sounds good.”
“I don’t like that mom.”
“How about corn dogs. Mario’s getting those.”
“That’s all Mario ever gets, mom. I just want ribs.”
The waitress came over to get our order and I asked about the ribs. She told us that they come in half and full orders and there’s two kinds: those pulled from the side of the pig or those from the back of the pig. Just the thought made me cringe and I thought for sure Ri would shutter in disgust, after all, I had to stop reading Charlotte’s Web to her the other night because she was so sad the farmer was going to kill the little pig.

“I want the ribs from the side, mom.”

And I swear those ribs were devoured within fifteen minutes of being served. Along with a side of baked beans.

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